Today, my friend excitedly told me about the number of guys who are romantically interested in her. I realized how pathetic my life is when all I could talk about in turn was the number of coupons I got to use today at the store. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I felt fairly depressed about being single for the holidays during work. This cute girl came to my register asking about our sales ad. After telling her we had no copies, she asked for my number. I shouted: "Finally, someone wants to go out with me." She wanted the store's number to call. FML
Today, my friends and I were walking past a bar. There were a few cute guys "rating" every girl that walked by with number cards. My friend, who is a guy, got an 8. I got a 2. FML
Today, I was having a chuckle at the girl who used to torment me since she’s on her fourth marriage. Then I realized she’s gotten four handsome, rich men to marry her, while I’m still hopelessly single and haven’t had a boyfriend since high school. FML
Today, I was talking with some of my friends who are girls. They were all complaining about how there was no good boys left to ask to the Sadie Hawkins Dance. Hoping for an invite I mentioned I was still available. They just laughed at me and invited me to come dress shopping with them. FML
Today, my love life is so pathetic that when I got a sample of cologne in the mail, I kept sniffing it just to remind myself what a guy smells like. FML
Today, my crush, who has turned me down in the past, actually gave me the “Why can’t I find a decent guy like you?” speech. That’s it, I’m officially THAT guy, I’m just that pathetic. I’d happily never see her again after this, except we live on the same street and work in the same building. FML
Today, I realized I have two guys interested in me. One is a boring lump who has a good job and takes me to nice places, and the other is a hilarious hot sexy goofball who can't hold down a job and shamelessly mooches off me. FML
Today, I was feeling bitter about the ballyhoo surrounding Valentine’s Day. I made a status on Facebook saying the holiday was stupid. Someone commented, “You’re only saying that because you can’t get a boyfriend to save your life and haven’t been laid in years because you’re obese.” They’re right. I cried. FML
Today, my best friend, who reckons I'm doing a terrible job at finding a boyfriend, has started giving out my number to all the men she thinks "look trustworthy" in the subway. FML
Today, I hung out with a friend who has been too busy to hang out with me in a few months. I decided to make the day super special with fun plans and spent a lot of money doing so. When I got home, her Facebook status said, "Pointless day, gone to bed." FML
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Top comments
teentee401 37
Wouldn't you rather curl up on the couch alone, binge eating discounted snacks and binge watching Netflix, instead of wasting time with a boyfriend? I know I would.
JesusOfNazareth 16
Keep your head up. There's somebody for you.
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Comments (108)
SpongeTheBrain 0
I'd rather collect coupons than date though.I really am not meant for the relationship stuff plus coupons don't need emotional attachment like you need to have in a relationship.
nikitol 8
But u can have hundreds of coupons so you're obviously the real winner
91hayek 31
And each coupon is probably for a value over twice as much the value of those guys.
Adri3025 9
Hey, if it makes you happy, stick with it. You'll find your guy :)
kuwar 7
it does not matter if she is lying or she may jealous from you
mattmsk005 8
Her wallet is jealous of you.
rachangie 19
Who cares about having multiple men!?! Teach me your extreme coupon secrets! Why would she brag about dragging men on anyways? That's just a little too heartless sounding to me.
Siettadulce 21
Keep your head up OP, you'll find someone (: But as of right now, be proud of those coupons! Saving money is always a good thing.
Chibi_Kitten 24
Ten years from now, you'll be hearing from your friend how much married life sucks and you will be happy to be free.
limabeans101029 21
Not necessarily. Obviously it's not for everyone, but a lot of people love married life. I don't like how so many people assume that marriage is such a terrible thing for everyone. I know absolutely loads of very happily married couples.
wuellmar 18
Well at least you stay life relevant. At least you are being smart and using your time to find and use coupons.
Baileybro21 4
I get excited about the ability to use more than three coupons, you've got no problem at all!