Miscellaneous: Today, my father told me he hasn't brushed his teeth for 30 years:...

By Mewsmash - 01/01/2016 16:23 - United States - Dublin

Today, my father told me he hasn't brushed his teeth for 30 years: he just wipes them with paper towels. I don't know whether to be horribly disgusted, or horribly jealous that he has never gotten a cavity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 275

You deserved it 1 546

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 06/09/2013 11:55 - United States - Louisville

Today, I saw my dad pick his teeth with a toothpick from a new box. He ate the food he got out of his teeth and put the toothpick back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 599

You deserved it 2 891

By Anonymous - 08/06/2015 14:11 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad told me he had a present for me. It was his tooth, which he had pulled out a few minutes before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 011

You deserved it 2 227

By Simon Cowell - 08/09/2018 20:30

Today, I realised my teeth are so stained that they look cleaner when I've not brushed them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 250

You deserved it 866

Digging it

By blech - 08/12/2014 23:08 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I witnessed my dad rummage through his nostrils, thoughtfully examine the contents, and flick them nonchalantly onto the carpet. All of this he did with the biggest demented grin on his face. Sadly, this has become a regular occurrence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 760

You deserved it 2 559

By clean - 16/09/2013 07:51 - Australia - Ashfield

Today, I walked in the bathroom to find my son cleaning his penis. It wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't cleaning it with a toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 159

You deserved it 4 279

Crooked

By Anonymous - 08/11/2009 04:04 - United States

Today, I taught my younger cousins a more effective way to brush their teeth. Tonight when I was getting them ready for bed, I asked them why they weren't brushing their teeth like I taught them to. The littlest one replied, "Daddy said if we do then we'll have ugly teeth like yours." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 494

You deserved it 7 138

Jaws 2: A Pig in the City

By Anonymous - 18/06/2020 02:03

Today, after a childhood of battling bad teeth and cavities, I'm an overzealous brusher. I found out that I have cavities in all quadrants of my mouth from over-brushing, which will need multiple appointments to fill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 506

You deserved it 223

Worst life hack ever

By 1meme129 - 24/02/2016 14:12 - United States - Denver

Today, my little cousin told me about how he never wipes his ass, because if he doesn't, he doesn't need to wash his hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 298

You deserved it 1 599

By aggghghgh - 14/05/2016 08:51

Today, I found out my whole family has been mistakenly using the same toothbrush for over a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 532

You deserved it 2 120

By bananayellowteeth - 03/05/2009 08:37 - United States

Today, I went to the dentist. After drilling my teeth for what seemed like hours, he gave me a long speech about how if I continue to smoke, the yellowing of my teeth won't be the only problem. I don't smoke. I never have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 854

You deserved it 9 073

LadyKayDee 23

Saturday 2 January 2016 15:38

I would be horribly disgusted. That's gross

CODplayer4lyfe 24

Saturday 2 January 2016 15:53

Maybe it's just me, but wouldn't wiping your teeth down with paper towels be more involving and possibly time consuming than a quick brush?

Comments

taylorbrown97 23

Saturday 2 January 2016 16:07

Even though he does not have any cavities, he could very well have gum disease, etc.

schreibergx93 19

Saturday 2 January 2016 16:23

Always be horribly disgusted, that is actually relay gross lol.

TheLadyOpal 30

Saturday 2 January 2016 16:24

I don't really swallow the notion that he's never gotten a cavity. When was his last dentist appointment? I bet that wasn't exactly recent either.

BlockOfRedStone 25

Saturday 2 January 2016 19:51

Some people don't get cavities as easily. My little bro goes months at a time without brushing his teeth. His breath smells fine and at 16 y/o he has never had a cavity at each semi-annual dentist appointment.