Today, my dog had an upset stomach and diarrhea. To avoid a mess on the carpet, I confined her to a gated area in the kitchen with sheets over the floor, so any mess could be cleaned up easily. Instead of going on the sheets, she sprayed shit all up the walls. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I couldn’t tell that my puppy had an upset stomach before I left for work. I came home to her covered in shit inside her crate. After cleaning her up and almost being done with the mess, my husband found where she had tried to lick herself clean and then vomited it up in our bedroom. FML
Today, my dog got his head stuck in a container, panicked, and shat himself all over the living room. FML
Today, I went home for lunch. Upon opening the door, I smelled something horrid. My dog had opened his cage, eaten all the dog treats, and had diarrhea all over my bed and bedroom floor. FML
Today, I have a case of diarrhea. How did I find out? I got startled by my dog jumping up to greet me, and I shat all over the kitchen floor. FML
Today, my dog had REALLY bad diarrhea. I found that out when I woke up to find it all over my bed. FML
Today, my dog figured out she can wipe her butthole on my walls after having squeezed out a turd or two. FML
Today, my dog wanted to go upstairs, but she has stitches and was having trouble. So I carried her to the top, at which point she peed all over my carpet. FML
Today, I caught my dog attempting to shit on the carpet. When I saw him, I screamed. Startled, he ran around the house, continuing to take his shit. Now, I don't have to clean up a nice pile, I get to go on a scavenger hunt and find all of the scattered turds. FML
Today, my dog has very watery diarrhea. I laid down paper towels to soak it up, and went to get sanitary wipes for the rest of it. When I came back, my dog had dragged the paper towels up onto the sand coloured loveseat. Sand coloured no longer. FML
Today, I brought my new puppy home. I saw her sniffing around, so I took her outside to do her business. She simply played in the grass for ten minutes, so I brought her in. She walked in the door, squatted, and shit. She has diarrhea. This is the fourth time today. FML
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Top comments
flea_of_death 23
Why not let her outside? O.o
Keevarou 17
At least the shit did not hot the fan? Now to something less lame, you did what you could, and to try and cover the walls too would not be on everyone's mind. you just had a stroke of bad luck, and hey. Cleaning up the walls are probably better than the carpets, and easier
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Comments (116)
JVIarijke 24
I think you kinda deserved it for confining your dog to a small area and thus upsetting it more, but anyway, it sucks that he hit the walls. Next time, just take it outside or somewhere it truly can't damage anything.
spluver0005 17
Just because a dog is confined to a kitchen doesn't mean it's unhappy. Most of the time when dogs are sick they just lay around and do nothing anyway so it's not like it wanted to be anywhere else
caden_bro 9
The dog wasn't trapped in a cage. It was in a kitchen, which I'm sure it feels safe enough in. When it happened, it was not OP's fault. She had no other options, unlessOP were to let the dog crap all over the house.
Sandsh8rk 36
Dog gets +100 points for long shot.
perdix 31
Sounds like a... *Lowers sunglasses* sheet-y situation.
ComoEsJuan 24
You've confused me. I'm not sure how I feel about this... *raises Perdix's glasses* I accept you.
yahoowizard 16
A triple entendre...impressive
masterof1 7
Time to re-paint! Next time have outside on a place which can be hosed down, or in the tub.
RedPillSucks 33
Once the walls are cleaned up, why repaint?
caden_bro 9
OP may not have wanted to keep the dog in such a small place, and nt have had a backyard.
Retrokitty 9
Make sure to keep the sheets down while you clean the walls! There ought to be some puke then.
AKAR2521 4
shoulda put it outside
perdix 31
Reminds me of that old book, "Spots on the Wall" by Hu Flung Dung. Have you forgotten that series which included "In the Tiger Cage" by Claude Balls and "Yellow Stream" by I. P. Freeley?
ComoEsJuan 24
Along with "Under the Bleachers" by Seymour Buns.
ryanthecheeseguy 18
What about, "How to make quick money" by Robin Banks?
BrotherPhil 35
And "The Rise of the Mini-Skirt" by Seymour Legg.
tjw1616 21
lol nice, cool dog, sucks for you though
EpicJman2828 11
This has happened to me before with two german sheperds how ever, they managed to get shit on the ceiling
Treveyon58 2
I am honestly curious how that's possible, but don't want to know how they did it.
martin8337 36
Adios, perro.