Kids: Today, my daughter decided to draw me a heart for my birthday.... - FML

By Whywhywhy - 20/08/2017 13:01

Today, my daughter decided to draw me a heart for my birthday. Unfortunately, she drew it on the side of my car. With a rock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 345

You deserved it 377

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Same thing different taste

By llozano715 - 13/09/2010 05:41 - France

Today, I got the car of my dreams. My daughter also learned how to write her name. Now I have "LAUREN" across the side of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 177

You deserved it 4 819

By nicchick411 - 27/03/2011 15:17 - United States

Today, it's my birthday and my kids made me a card. Unfortunately, my kids used the wall for paper. Now I have red and blue crayon all over my bedroom wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 195

You deserved it 8 107

Picasso in training

By Anonymous - 18/05/2024 14:00 - United Kingdom - Newcastle

Today, I discovered my 3-year-old daughter's artistic skills. She managed to draw an elaborate mural on our living room wall. The masterpiece? A stick figure family, including our dog, but instead of a tail, he has a second head. She of course used permanent markers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 378

You deserved it 158

By Anonymous - 14/04/2012 04:57 - United States - Paducah

Today, it was my 16th birthday. My surprise was a new car, that is now in the side of the garage because my mom lost control while driving it around front. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 032

You deserved it 4 329

By nick - 24/07/2012 00:52 - United States - Palm Desert

Today, it was my daughter's birthday. I didn't know I had a daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 499

You deserved it 12 605

By Anonymous - 04/12/2010 23:31 - Canada

Today, I got a birthday card from my parents. It was my sister's from earlier in the year. They scratched out her name and wrote mine underneath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 567

You deserved it 2 628

By Noname - 15/03/2009 05:39 - United States

Today, I went to a birthday party for my friend's daughter. I picked up a gift for the girl and another for her parents. I got the mother a cute little garden stone that read "What our children see in the world depends on what we show them." Later, I found out her daughter is blind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 559

You deserved it 17 220

Throw the bill at the kid. Do it.

By Deadmeat - 12/09/2017 04:29

Today, I was really excited that I'd made it the two weeks I'd borrowed my mother-in-law's new car without putting a scratch on it. I got off work to discover a customer's child throwing rocks in the parking lot. They cracked the windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 047

You deserved it 271

By time to lawyer up - 20/02/2014 21:20 - United States - Forney

Today, I saw a photo on my mother-in-law's Facebook, proudly showing off the horrible job she'd done of painting her car. I sarcastically commented that I wouldn't inflict that on my worst enemy's ride. An hour later, she came by and emptied a bucket of paint over my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 398

You deserved it 52 951

By NooOOooOO - 11/10/2017 23:15

Today, I learned how artistically talented my daughter is. Unfortunately, her favorite medium to work in is poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 041

You deserved it 341

Next

Top comments

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 20 August 2017 14:36

It’s because you rock, Dad! Plot twist: the daughter is 34 years old.

sumocj 14

Sunday 20 August 2017 15:39

How nice for your daughter to get you something so expensive!

Comments

Dave_Davington 33

Sunday 20 August 2017 14:24

That's a rocky situation. I regret nothing.

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 20 August 2017 14:36

It’s because you rock, Dad! Plot twist: the daughter is 34 years old.

RetireEngland 24

Sunday 20 August 2017 14:49

Shouldn't smoke during pregnancy and this doesn't happen

sumocj 14

Sunday 20 August 2017 15:39

How nice for your daughter to get you something so expensive!

Lobby_Bee 17

Sunday 20 August 2017 17:21

Do what most proud fathers would do. Frame it up, hang it on your refrigerator door, and smile at it every morning while you sip your coffee before heading off to work.

Dave_Davington 33

Sunday 20 August 2017 18:01

What, the entire car?

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 20 August 2017 20:03

No, silly, just the door, hood, trunk or quarter panel where she did her artwork.

martucha854 11

Monday 21 August 2017 1:07

Or maybe he could just take a picture of it? I think it would be slightly easier to hang it up.

Lee Elliott 4

Monday 21 August 2017 3:08

eh, think of it like this: its just how it looks, its not like suddenly the car doesn't work anymore, and you absolutely NEED to get an expensive repair.

Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20

Monday 21 August 2017 8:09

exactly. Except if the heart was f*ckin huge. What I don't think happened. Because if your daugther was big enough to reach on top of the car, then she should be old enough to know better...

Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20

Monday 21 August 2017 8:06

Aww It could be worse yknow... All my little sister will do on my dads bday is trun around in bed and say "I don't f*cking care..." Yes, you may call her ungrateful.

Meala Skobeleva 5

Saturday 14 October 2017 20:23

must be a really old car and heart mean, we died soon

VeryAnnoyed481549 11

Tuesday 24 July 2018 20:28

aww how sweet...?

Keywords

Love Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Romantic Christmas Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Bosses Capitalism Work Cars You're fired Covid Health Cheating Jealousy Kids Parenting

The Top

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 551

You deserved it 49 635

Today, my boyfriend "proposed" to me. When we first started dating, he told me that he hated the concept of marriage and absolutely never wanted to go through with it. So I laughed and turned him down, obviously thinking it was just a joke. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 237

The Top

Today, a lady I know gave my 3 year-old daughter a little coin purse, saying, "Your mum can put some money in that for you." My daughter responded, "But mummy has no money." I would have laughed, had it not been spot on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 770

You deserved it 129

Today, I was feeling really stressed so I bought some nice stress relieving lotion. When I got home, I took it out of the bag and accidentally dropped it (not realizing it was made of glass). The bottle shattered into pieces and I even cut my finger on one piece. So much for relieving stress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 283

You deserved it 4 535

Today, is the blizzard. I have to go into work, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't show up. I sent him a picture of the snow completely covering my car. He said I moved the snow there and could move it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 397

You deserved it 2 278

Today, my fiancé and I were having dinner with my parents. My mom asked when we were thinking of having kids. My fiancé cheerfully said, “When pigs fly and Hell freezes over!” He’s right, but I was hoping to break the news a little more gently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 508

You deserved it 212

Today, in the bus, my Gatorade bottle's badly screwed cap resulted in my Jello being ruined and yellow Gatorade poured all over myself, the seat, and the floor. It looks like I pissed myself, and I still have to go through a whole building where several of my colleagues live before making it home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 597

You deserved it 257

Today, at work, a midget came in to buy beer. Not only was he almost as tall as me, he got offended when I had to card him and explain that the manager told me to card everyone, and that it wasn't because he was short. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 406

You deserved it 3 279