Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the very first time in three years. Apparently, all it took was anal. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. He followed it with, "Want to try anal?" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML
Nice try, chief
Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML
The best method!
Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML
Today, my boyfriend of over a year finally told me he loved me. This revelation was quickly followed by "at least, I think this is how people feel when they say that." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML
Non sequitur
Today, while at dinner, I told my boyfriend that I wished he liked sushi. He replied, "I wish you liked anal." FML
Bad timing
Today, while having sex, I told my boyfriend that I loved him. I could feel him go soft inside me. FML
Today, the only thing I got for my birthday was my boyfriend's offer to give me "the gift of anal". FML
Top comments
perdix 29
It used to be "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach," but now it is apparently "the way to a man's heart is through your asshole." On the other hand, I wouldn't trust an "I love you" that is said right after anal -- he's probably talking shit.
thegooseisloose 0
38 I see what you did there.
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Comments (218)
Insomniasenemy 6
Anal eww never in my life will I do that!
MeggieManiacal 0
@197, why want to? It is a gross place to put something...not to mention painful! (Personal experience. My bf was texting and missed once.)
sugarbear0727 19
I love anal. Of course it hurts at first, but after a minute or two, you should be fine. My boyfriend does want me to get a strap-on and do him anally. He's got quite a few unique things he likes. He is a very open minded person, and has 5 more years experience than I do, so I usually try things he likes to see if I'll like it. He likes feet, he wants me to pee on him, he wants me to do him anally. Everyone is different. Don't fault people for what they do in the bedroom because you've never tried it, or simply because you don't like it. If it feels good to them, leave your damn opinions to yourself.
andiboo 12
I would hate to tell you all this... But the anus is easily loosened. The ****** bounces right back. The anus, however, does not. It can actually need stitches and/or a surgery to tighten it so that you can be able to "hold it in" after having sex with it so much. The anus is a thin membrane, since it really is just the end of your bowels, and it's only able to stretch to a certain point. The ****** also self lubricates, and is made for sex, so it DOESNT contain deadly bacteria and, well, crap. It's not safe to have anal sex for many reasons.
cryfavreau 10
You seriouly stayed with him for 3 years without him saying he loved you?
swedeNix 13
Id say he is gay
drew60 11
I wish every women understood this
iceberg 10
An I love you during sex doesn't count