Work: Today, my boss yelled at me for being 3 hours late. I was late...

By MoonStarShine3 - United Kingdom - Chorley

Today, my boss yelled at me for being 3 hours late. I was late because I fell down the stairs and broke my arm. Apparently, breaking my arm is not a good enough excuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29335

You deserved it

2052

Favorite

Work

Family values

Headache

Sister of the year

By WhyMe

Today, at work, a customer was staring at me for a long time. Hoping to break the awkwardness, I asked him what brought him to the store today. He complimented me on my friendly demeanor and then followed up with: "Since you're so friendly, how about coming in the bathroom with me and giving me a hand?" FML

I agree, your life sucks

6080

You deserved it

349

Favorite

By Anonymous

Today, I had a full on "conversation" with my cat about her laying off the catnip. I really need to get out more. FML

I agree, your life sucks

13981

You deserved it

27709

Favorite

By notacreeper

Today, I told my mother I have a girlfriend. Her first answer was "Does she know?" FML

I agree, your life sucks

42138

You deserved it

5286

Favorite

By Well... fuck me sideways and call me Eustace - United States - Riverside

Today, on my way to work, I hit a pothole about the size of Alabama, bending my wheel and flattening my tire. After changing it and having to explain myself to my furious boss, I went back on that road in my other car to take a picture of the pothole. While looking for it, I hit it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks

17473

You deserved it

42167

Favorite

By T___T - United States - Cleveland

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that no, my period arriving several days late doesn't mean I have AIDS. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27287

You deserved it

2279

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I noticed that someone smeared "wash me" into the grime of my car. I decided to take it to get a wash. I pulled up, put my vehicle in neutral, and kicked back as it slowly started to move. You never realize how long it takes a sun roof to close until water is dumping on your head. FML

I agree, your life sucks

15748

You deserved it

60851

Favorite

By GoneLimp - United States - Havelock

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend doggy-style and noticed a piece of toilet paper had been "left behind". I had such a bad internal conflict about whether to tell her or to remove it myself, I went limp. She started crying and accused me of not being attracted to her anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks

8074

You deserved it

1397

Favorite

By Anonymous - 5/11/2020 10:57

Great first impression

Today, I finally spoke to a counsellor about my depression. As soon as the session started, I became so anxious that I could barely speak. Once the Zoom call was finished, I got the distinct impression that she thought I was mentally disabled. FML

I agree, your life sucks

679

You deserved it

Favorite

By Mortified - Australia

Today, I was in the living room with my brother and his two older, hot friends when my mother walks out from the toilet and tells me, "Honey, if you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie wipe the seatie." Need I say more? FML

I agree, your life sucks

51928

You deserved it

17325

Favorite

By Anonymous

Today, I was woken up by an overly sappy good morning text from my boyfriend, complete with kissy-face images. Before I could text him back, he sent a follow-up. "Oops. Wrong person." Wait, what? FML

I agree, your life sucks

3884

You deserved it

305

Favorite

By Gomer - United States - New York

Today, I went to a veterans' reunion party with my grandpa. While there, a guy started yelling at me for having an unapproved haircut. It was my grandpa's old drill sergeant, and he thought I was in the army too. Everyone just smirked as he forced me to drop and do push-ups. FML

I agree, your life sucks

38356

You deserved it

5845

Favorite

By hungry - United States - Waverly

Today, my husband offered to do the weekly grocery shopping. Because he has never done the shopping before, I made him a list of what we needed and other optional foods to give him an idea of what to get. He came back with a week's worth of ramen noodles and 2 litres of soda. FML

I agree, your life sucks

14913

You deserved it

2178

Favorite

By mandiballz - United States

Nice

Today, I was saying goodbye to my 5 year-old son before dropping him at my mom's, as I was leaving for two days, and told him I would miss him. He said, "l won't miss you, I never miss you when you are gone." FML

I agree, your life sucks

36683

You deserved it

4429

Favorite

By "Noelle Diane Irwin"

Today, I just found out that my sister slept with the guy that I have had a crush on for years and that she may or may not be pregnant with his child. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2228

You deserved it

258

Favorite

By alek - United States

Today, I was the waiter for my family at the village inn. This wasn't so bad until I found out they left me no tip, only a napkin that said, "Get a haircut." FML

I agree, your life sucks

27688

You deserved it

3650

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, it was my birthday. The only person that remembered was my creepy stalker. FML

I agree, your life sucks

33095

You deserved it

3276

Favorite

By dexter - United States

Today, I had lunch with a couple of my friends and a guy I like. Another guy I have a crush on came and ate with us too. After lunch, one of the guys I have a crush on told me the other guy I like is sexy. FML

I agree, your life sucks

24591

You deserved it

4918

Favorite

By nobodywasthere

Today, I rushed onto the metro to get to work. I found there were no seats left and asked a perfectly healthy guy to let me sit in the handicap spot. He refused to because "being tired" was a handicap characteristic. I have one leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4592

You deserved it

269

Favorite

By smashleighfig - France

Today, I found out my husband of 10 years has a online blog. Excited to read about myself, I began skimming, only to find out that every entry is him explaining how he let his "soulmate" walk away 9 years ago because of his "previous commitment" and how he regrets it every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks

39962

You deserved it

3594

Favorite

By fionnathehuman - United States

Today, my 6-year-old son pooped in the back yard and used a stick to throw it over the fence into my neighbor's yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25227

You deserved it

3802

Favorite

By disturbed - United States

Today, I got rear-ended at a stoplight by a woman who had been doing her make-up while driving. She didn't get out to see if I was okay until she had finished perfectly applying both lipliner and gloss. FML

I agree, your life sucks

58752

You deserved it

2720

Favorite

By Danielle Heichelbech - 15/11/2020 20:01

Messy

Today my 28-year-old husband got bored while cleaning the car. So he decided to stage a "crumb sacrifice to the vacuum gods" to "ensure a bountiful harvest." FML

I agree, your life sucks

632

You deserved it

257

Favorite

By Rich - United States

Today, my parents gave me a shirt from Banana Republic for my birthday. It looked like one I had bought for myself a couple of days earlier but I thanked them and went to hang it in my closet. An empty hanger hung where I placed the shirt I had purchased. They gave me my shirt for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks

116870

You deserved it

5541

Favorite

By Pfff - France

Today, I argued with a boy from school over a girl. I didn't know he was a black belt judoka. I'm still in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23342

You deserved it

8062

Favorite

By oops - Canada - Okotoks

Today, while packing for a trip, my mom bumped my bag and it started to vibrate. She flew into a huge rage calling me all sorts of colourful names, thinking it was a sex toy. It was my tooth brush. FML

I agree, your life sucks

76395

You deserved it

5665

Favorite

By FUCK THE PIGS - United States - Oakland

Today, during lunch, my coworker offered me her food, claiming she was full. I was still quite hungry, so I accepted it. Halfway through eating the sandwiches, my boss walked in and started interrogating people over who took his lunch. I quickly realized I was the one eating it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

37352

You deserved it

4146

Favorite

By lover21 - United States

Today, while working at my tanning salon, a woman came in and I put her in a booth, which are all stand up. After she comes out, I go in to clean it and realize that floor is all wet. I questioned her about it and she replies, "Oh, I peed, that's not a drain?". FML

I agree, your life sucks

66568

You deserved it

2844

Favorite

By sexyfreak2510 - South Africa

Today, at my bachelorette party, I got so wasted, I ended up giving my stripper a lap dance because he "wasn't doing it properly". There's photos. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11260

You deserved it

51730

Favorite

By SoupCanoe - United Kingdom

Today, my mum gave me half-raw chicken for dinner. After she refused to cook it again, I threw it away saying that I didn't want to get salmonella. She told to be more grateful, and that I was an idiot for trying to use salmonella as an excuse because 'it's chicken, not salmon'. FML

I agree, your life sucks

42999

You deserved it

3840

Favorite

By annoyedwithkids - Canada

Today, I was baby sitting ten year old twins. When they first saw me, they ran away screaming and hid in the closet. This isn't the first house where this has happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks

33551

You deserved it

5383

Favorite

By Anonymous - 16/3/2020 23:01

Confinement's gonna be fun

Today, I left the house to get groceries. My parents asked me where I was going and how long I would be gone for. Thinking they were just being inquisitive parents, I ignored them. I got home 20 minutes later to them having sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks

762

You deserved it

2104

Favorite

By Anonymous

Spider-man

Today, I tried to catch a spider in a glass. It was on the paper and I wanted it to fall into the glass, but I moved the paper the wrong way, screeched like a banshee and flung the glass at the floor. I was barefoot. FML

I agree, your life sucks

577

You deserved it

1207

Favorite

By shitface - United States - Arlington

Shared towel

Today, after I took a shower, I was wiping my face with the towel I share with my sister. It smelled peculiar, so I took my face away and looked at it. Turns out, I was wiping my face on a huge shit stain. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1971

You deserved it

1170

Favorite

By badsister - United States

Today, I made a batch of "special" brownies for a party I was going to tonight. I wrapped them up and put them on the counter with a note that said DO NOT EAT. Later on I came home from some errands to find a tray of half eaten brownies and my ten year old sister passed out on the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks

14115

You deserved it

59318

Favorite

By BadKitty - Australia - Invermay

Today, I woke up to a loud bang. Thinking someone had broken in, I grabbed my hunting knife and ran downstairs, only to find my TV on the floor, completely destroyed, and my cat casually sitting next to it without a care in the world. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11761

You deserved it

1236

Favorite

By a hex upon your anus, sir - United Kingdom

Today, I got on the subway with a broken leg. A kind woman stood up and offered me her seat. Before I could sit down, a guy shoved past me and took it for himself. The woman and I pointed out my cast and crutches, and asked him to give up the seat. He responded by flipping us off. FML

I agree, your life sucks

58209

You deserved it

3241

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom asked me if I had any plans to go out tonight. To divert attention, I pretended to be angry and accused her of prying into my social life. Actually, I have no social life and nobody to go out with. My only "big plans" were to finish my Sudoku book. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11110

You deserved it

24088

Favorite

By anonymous - United States

Today, I was driving home from work when I saw the woman in the car in front of me throw something out the window. Only when it landed on my windshield did I realize what it was. A bloody tampon. FML

I agree, your life sucks

48301

You deserved it

2630

Favorite

By ohtheirony - United States - Reno

Today, while trying to explain to my friends what an anxiety attack is like, I had an anxiety attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22960

You deserved it

2138

Favorite

By whatthefuck - United States - Providence

Today, I had a dream where I was having the best sex of my life. With Donald Trump. My boyfriend hasn't stopped laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25421

You deserved it

5638

Favorite

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By cozzyboy1234 | 12

#6315616 - Wednesday 10 June 2015 0:43

Your boss is a dick. Enough said.

By Welshite | 39

#6315621 - Wednesday 10 June 2015 0:43

Break a leg, OP.

COMMENTS

By cozzyboy1234 | 12

#6315616 - Wednesday 10 June 2015 0:43

Your boss is a dick. Enough said.

ScarredVox92 | 16

#6315796 - Wednesday 10 June 2015 4:46

Lol that's the kind of place that wouldn't even give workman's comp.

By Welshite | 39

#6315621 - Wednesday 10 June 2015 0:43

Break a leg, OP.

balboa_2 | 24

#6315727 - Wednesday 10 June 2015 2:45

I've broken my leg in 5 places and it just completely sucked

ThuNDeY | 23

#6315734 - Wednesday 10 June 2015 3:09

Your boss's leg...

slingerslasher | 24

#6316584 - Thursday 11 June 2015 0:02

It sucked, #23? That's odd, when I broke my leg in 5 places it was actually quite pleasant, like a nice massage :)

By MandyO | 15

#6315626 - Wednesday 10 June 2015 0:45

You still went into work three hours after breaking your arm? Your boss should give you an award, not a lecture.

EatUrGreens | 20

#6315896 - Wednesday 10 June 2015 7:39

It sounds like OP didn't call his/her boss to let them know, otherwise s/he would have said so. Maybe that's why s/he got yelled at.

attaboyyy11 | 11

#6315907 - Wednesday 10 June 2015 8:03

Most likely situation.

RoseCrystal | 17

#6316619 - Thursday 11 June 2015 0:31

I could argue the point that maybe due to pain meds, cell phone signal failure, etc. the OP couldn't reach their boss. If I broke my arm, I'd forget most things.