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By gunnar - / Thursday 20 September 2018 17:30 /
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By  Dave_Davington  |  30

I guess the question now is what exactly is this tic, precisely? If it's something minor like the occasional wink or eye twitch, then your mother is a tad over the line. If, on the other hand, it's something a little more noticeable like rubbing your nipples while barking like a dog, then her reaction is far more understandable.

By  interesting33  |  35

wow that is SO not ok of her to do that! it is natural and a classic response on your part. I hope she deals with her anger and realised this. An Autism for parents course might be good. It is hard when it is your own child I think to take a step back when looking at behaviour and realise it is. natural response.

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By  interesting33  |  35

wow that is SO not ok of her to do that! it is natural and a classic response on your part. I hope she deals with her anger and realised this. An Autism for parents course might be good. It is hard when it is your own child I think to take a step back when looking at behaviour and realise it is. natural response.

By  Dave_Davington  |  30

I guess the question now is what exactly is this tic, precisely? If it's something minor like the occasional wink or eye twitch, then your mother is a tad over the line. If, on the other hand, it's something a little more noticeable like rubbing your nipples while barking like a dog, then her reaction is far more understandable.

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No, it's not understandable.
An autistic person does not control their tics and screaming at them is only going to cause distress and make the tics even worse.
His mother must know that and therefore is a complete bitch for acting that way.

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  Dave_Davington  |  30

For all you self-righteous dullards who can't tell the difference, that was humour, not armchair psychiatry. I recommend you all see a proctologist about getting that stick removed from your rectal cavity.

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  SneezyBear  |  27

For argument's sake, if his "tic" was to rub his *mother's* nipples instead of his own, you still wouldn't find the mum's yelling understandable?

Everyone has limits.

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  KittyMack  |  11

All the more reason to NOT yell at OP in public. A nervous tic will only get worse after stress like yelling (any loud noises are stressors but hostility AND noise is super stressing), and being made the center of attention through a public scene. The mother's freakout would make the tic worsen. So the more uncomfortable the tic, the more reason to keep as calm and comfortable an environment as possible to help give OP the best odds of suppressing it.
What on earth do you think the freakout accomplishes? OP gonna be all "Wow thanks mum, that public humiliation made my anxiety totally vanish! I'm totes chill now. Well done!"
ugh

By  PenguinPal3017  |  15

I would have just walked out. I don't put up with stuff like that anymore. If you're going to treat me poorly I'm gone.

By  Chazzster  |  19

And now we know why OP’s family almost never goes out to eat in a restaurant...

Frankly I can see some of both sides. Must the parents of autistic or other developmentally challenged children give up the ordinary niceties of going out as a family? And is it fair to shout at a child or young adult who acts out in potentially embarrassing ways if they cannot help it? I think the answer to both of these questions is no, but with a footnote.

One of the problems autistic individuals face is an apparent inability to read social clues or always act in “socially acceptable” ways. We do not know the true extent of the “tic” that OP was expressing or if the other diners in the restaurant were giving social cues to OP’s family that the particular behavior was bothering them. While OP’s Mom was obviously wrong to scream at their autistic offspring, that does not mean that there was not a problem of some sort. And only OP knows for sure if they were truly unable to control their expressions of the “tic” or if they were unwilling to do so - There are degrees of every condition.

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