Today, it was my friend's birthday. She's been having problems with most of her friends besides me lately, so I wanted to do something special. I brought her a cake. Me and her were the only ones to have any. It gave us both food poisoning. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I celebrated my birthday with my friend who has the same birthday by going out to dinner with a bunch of our friends. The waiter brought out a cake for my friend but not for me. No one noticed my exclusion. I sang happy birthday on my birthday. FML
Today, it was my co-worker's birthday but she told me not to mention it. Feeling bad for her, I went out to buy her a card, a present, and even a small cake. It turns out that there was actually a party during our lunch break, and I was the only one in our office not invited. FML
Today, it was my best friend's birthday party. Her boyfriend and I agreed to organize a dinner date to surprise her and celebrate. They celebrated, but forgot me until they arrived at the restaurant and saw the dinner reservation under my name. FML
Today, I found out that my best friend was having a birthday party and I wasn't invited. I had just finished planning a surprise party for her. FML
Today, it was my birthday. Two of my best friends forgot it, and so did my grandparents. All of my friends were busy, so I spent it alone in my car. FML
Today, we held a funeral for a friend who'd died of food poisoning that he contracted at the funeral for another friend. FML
Today, I celebrated my birthday with a few friends at home. As I bent down over my cake, my friend pushed my face into it. The baker should've told me she put a stick in it to support the cake. FML
Today, I showed up to my friend’s birthday party with a huge cake... on what turned out to be the wrong day. The actual party is tomorrow. Her family laughed and thought if was cute, but I just wanted the floor to open up and let me disappear. FML
Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the first to tell her happy birthday. When I awoke in the morning, I decided to bake her a cake. Little did I know my whole family was going out to lunch to celebrate. I wasn't invited. FML
Today, at the supermarket, I bought a cake and had my friend's name put on it. It wasn't anyone's birthday, I just wanted to feel less ashamed about buying a whole cake for myself. FML
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Top comments
Holly_GoLightly 0
Shitty. thats why you need to buy icecream cake
minidonut54 0
she DID buy something storemade D:
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Comments (122)
drummer1031 0
well just be happy that you didnt make it. just tell her that you bought it and u seriously didnt make it. =P i think itll be ok!
BaldOuting 0
maybe she did make it. she just said she brought it, not bought it.
BaldOuting 0
maybe its a sign
amazons 0
You said "me and her" instead of "she and I." You deserve food poisoning, you idiot.
ThisIsTaboo 0
Nothing says "best friends forever" like puking your guts out together...
jSOPURE 3
Poison cake bomb! :(
cazzy_33 0
ITS PRETTY HARD TO GET FOOD POISENING FROM A CAKE. unless the eggs are off or milk but u would have smelt that...so YDI
shorty_64 0
her and I... come on people
darkelf06 0
71: yeah well your comment is also the most hilarious thing i've read in my life! REALLY?! not... c'mon no one does that anymore... and bout the cake incident... that really sucks for you. i'd blame the store for not checking their cakes before they're sold, or checking if their ingredients were expired.
garmachi 0
You deserve it for being the sort of person who says "me and her" instead of "she and I". Enjoy your food poisoning you classless trollop.