Happy Birthday!

Pee on him to let him know who's boss.

Yes, because that's a great idea.

well.. surprise!!!

dogs are the best

At least you got something.....

I guess crap is a nice birthday present for your standards.

Atleast you got something...

Ow! You got beat to punch

It seems you and #2 were thinking the exact same dumb thing!

I would prefer nothing, rather than shit.

Cleveland voice: Oh thats nasty....

Did he poop on your bed OP?

No shit.

#8 Out of all the crappy puns here yours is the best

Yes shit!

No, the dog bought him a PS4.

"Except my dog who left me a present on my bed."
"left me a present on my bed"
"a present on my bed"
"on my bed"
NO IT WAS IN HER CEREAL BOWL

Happy birthday!!

Well, at least you got something, your dog will be there all day with you regardless of whether or not he knows it's your birthday

Judging by the way OP regarded this "present," it was something unpleasant. Poop or vomit or something dead, probably.

I know this is a bad situation, OP. But it's not the end of the world! Tell everyone that they forgot; do not worry about making them feel bad. They deserve it. Treat yourself! Relax today, if you can. Or go out on a drive. I don't know, spend your birthday doing something you enjoy. Never let the incompetence of others ruin your mood.

Make them feel like the shit your dog left for you

Did you happen to buy an ice cream cake from the store by any chance?

poor thing :( make them clean it up

Yeah because OP is totally going to leave that mess fermenting on their bed just to make them clean it up.