Today, I woke up to find a tick stuck to my eyelashes. The only way I know of to get it off is with fire. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Ticked off
Today, I woke up to a pain on my eyelid. I stumbled into the bathroom to find a huge tick attached to the edge of my eyelid. My dad used tweezers to pull it off, only the head stuck. I had to go to the doctor and sit there for 15 minutes so she could pull the rest out. FML
New, from Goop
Today, after a nap, I went to scratch my eye and felt what I presumed to be a clump of mascara on my eyelash. I didn't wear mascara today. It was a tick. FML
Today, I found a tick half-buried in my nipple. FML
Where did you come from?
Today, I was about to get in the shower, when I felt an odd itch in my navel. I saw what I thought was bellybutton lint, so I pulled on it, and quickly realized what I had between my fingers was a still-squirming, headless tick. FML
Today, I was at a fire roasting marshmallows. When mine caught on fire, I pulled it back so I could blow out the flames. It flew off the stick, and, still flaming, landed on my face. FML
Yucky!
Today, I picked my dog up and nibbled her ear. On the tip of her ear was a large tick, which burst, sending blood into my mouth. FML
A visitor
Today, I had a walk-in: a tiny tick, crawling through my bathroom window, looking down at me in the shower, wondering whether I might be tasty. The window was closed, by the way. FML
Today, I was camping out under the stars on my trampoline. I was just about asleep when I felt a tickle on my arm. Figuring it was an ant, I brushed it off. The rest of the red ants crawling up my arm didn't like that. FML
Today, I woke up to my cat slowly dragging her paw across my face. I opened my eyes to see a bloody mouse dangling an inch from my face. It was still twitching. FML
Today, I woke up with a burning sensation on my butt. Remembering that yesterday I was bit by a fire ant, I decided to reinspect the bite. I found ten more which itch and burn. My parents' new nickname for me is "Firebutt". FML
Top comments
Richisme 0
fire wins all the time
MusicXisXii 0
Fire is how you kill them. You can get them off with tweezers. Just make sure you don't leave ANY part of the tick inside of your skin or on your eyelash or whatever.
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Comments (239)
PotatoBlankey39 2
DUDE If you're from Minnesota then you would know how to get rid of tick safely! Use tweezers or go to the hospital and have a trained medical professional get it off your face... I swear if I turn on the news and see "Idiot hick burns face off in attempt to get rid of tick," I won't feel bad. Don't give Minnesotans a bad name... Remove it with a tweezers and THEN burn it.
anaisnin 0
Also being from MN I would have to say just pluck it off and go about your day. nbd. That's what I would do anyway...
brenanafish 18
Having lived in MN.. Agreed.
BringTheHeat 0
wtf?
riverrat82 0
ydi for not getting plastic knife and cutting of the eyelid.
rileykins 0
noo, light it on fire AFTER you remove it. who's actually stupid enough to light it on fire while it's still on them. damn haha.
Ashle1gh 14
Light a match, let the match go out, then while the end is still hot, place it on the tick. The tick should let go, but I'm not promising anything. The only other alternative I can think of would be to cover the tick with alcohol. You could also try the Vaseline thing mentioned above.
Co0kieLovexx 0
Aw!Id hate if i were in youur situation.honestly. But seriously fire?Uh,what about tweezers?
xStiina 0
ouch! fyl.
Noyes654 0
very no! fire makes them vomit inside of you, cover them completely with petroleum jelly and they suffocate and detach
nerdsgetmehot 23
Or peanut butter if you don't have petroleum jelly. (Really, it works just as well...As weird as that sounds!)
polkadot3155 6
woow. really? you just pull it off with a tweezer then burn it to kill it
capnbzarr 43
You clearly need to learn more about ticks before you try anything stupid... And when you post your next FML, "Today, I blinded myself in one eye while trying to remove a tick. FML": I'll be LMAO while I click YDI.