Miscellaneous: Today, I went to my grandmom's house for an hour or so. When...

By anonymous - 23/04/2013 21:07 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I went to my grandmom's house for an hour or so. When I came home, my boyfriend was on the bed, covered in the sheets and about to cry. Turns out he taped his ballsack to his leg and couldn't get it off because it "hurts too much." I'm 24 and he's 26. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 411

You deserved it 5 514

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Same thing different taste

Stuck

By Miki13 - 11/11/2012 20:27 - Canada - Whitby

Today, I had dinner with my grandparents. At the table, my grandfather openly complained about how hard it is for him to get out of their hot tub. Not because of his prosthetic leg, but because his balls somehow "get stuck". I really didn't need to know that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 968

You deserved it 1 727

Do ya think I'm sexy?

By wifelyduties - 17/04/2020 14:00

Today, my husband called me to our bedroom, saying he needed help with something. I found him sitting on the bed with his pants down, so I smiled and asked if he was angling for sex, which was fine with me. Nope. He needed me to pop a pimple under his ballsack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 207

You deserved it 346

By love4cheese1197 - 02/08/2019 20:00

Today, I had to listen to my best friend explain how to properly unstick one's balls from one's leg. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 429

You deserved it 243

By todaddy - 23/05/2014 19:32 - United Kingdom

Today, my 5-year-old son woke up early and ran into my bedroom to wake me up. Unfortunately, he did this by jumping onto my bed, slamming his knee into my balls in the process. I had to explain my tears of agony away by claiming I was just so happy to see him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 197

You deserved it 4 736

By JessBaby - 04/05/2009 20:44 - United States

Today, I found out my grandmother passed away. When I told my boyfriend I began to cry. Instead of caring, he said "you're getting my bed wet," rolled over, and fell asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 981

You deserved it 6 566

By Anonymous - 04/01/2014 23:13 - Canada - Hamilton

Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 684

You deserved it 5 695

Pissed

By Matt - 13/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 160

You deserved it 464

By b.fritz - 24/09/2016 10:02 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, I'm sitting in the emergency room because my girlfriend thought it would be funny to superglue my penis to my thigh while I was sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 748

You deserved it 1 181

Bigmouth strikes again

By Anonymous - 19/09/2020 08:01 - United States

Today, my boyfriend came over. My mom told him the story about the time she caught me having sex with my ex-boyfriend. My ex is his best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 751

You deserved it 1 180

By EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - 17/08/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 285

You deserved it 7 523

EvilUndead 9

Wednesday 24 April 2013 9:01

Well, if he took a hot bath, warm water would make it easier to peel off.

flockz 19

Wednesday 24 April 2013 9:04

i once heard from a monk that female saliva will just take the tape adhesive right off. trust him, he's a monk.

Comments

dinosxxrawr 22

Wednesday 24 April 2013 9:05

before we think about ways to get the tap off I must ask, why is the tap there in the first place?

Bakarra 22

Wednesday 24 April 2013 10:19

Maybe he was trying to listen for secret conversations going on within his balls? I dunno...

Bakarra 22

Wednesday 24 April 2013 20:55

Tap(n)- a device used for secretly listening to a conversation ex. Wiretap

Alihb 16

Wednesday 24 April 2013 21:32

I think he just typoed tape makes a world of sense

StarThrower 17

Wednesday 24 April 2013 9:06

Well...you just need to channel his curiosity and desire for experimentation in a different direction. IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN ;D

Alihb 16

Wednesday 24 April 2013 21:31

CAT CAT CAT CAT CAT CAT CAT CAT...... I like cats.....

Tim2415 16

Wednesday 24 April 2013 9:09

That's why you don't let a guy play with tape and have time on his hands....

PenguinBitch 43

Wednesday 24 April 2013 9:10

"Sorry, but the directions on how to clean the house weren't simple. I got my balls taped to my leg."

bandofsand 10

Wednesday 24 April 2013 9:21

Has he lost his marBALLS?

Leprekhaun 14

Wednesday 24 April 2013 9:37

He's a keeper!

karlcolt45 19

Wednesday 24 April 2013 9:42

seems about the right age for it

BlackBlazeCobra 16

Wednesday 24 April 2013 9:55

I hope it wasn't duct tape

SMHsohard 22

Wednesday 24 April 2013 10:11

I moderated this one, hoping it would get in, simply because I wanted the opportunity to say... Wait for it... "Guess he made a real ******** of himself."