By failingdaily - New Zealand - Paraparaumu Today, I went on Facebook, only to see my grandpa had posted "feeling horny" with my grandma. FML I agree, your life sucks 40828 You deserved it 3999 70 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ice4eva Today, I was eating pizza and I started bitching about how our campus doesn't have any healthy food choices, and that I was forced to eat this disgusting, greasy pizza. My friend then pointed out that I was standing next to the salad bar. FML I agree, your life sucks 478 You deserved it 3309 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Deerfield Beach Today, I woke up with a splitting headache. I have no idea what happened the night before, except for the fact that I'd tucked two uncapped vodka bottles into bed beside me, and now my room reeks of a Russian sorority house. FML I agree, your life sucks 7415 You deserved it 26120 83 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By payne - United States Today, I found my daughter's brand new ipod touch. At the bottom of the washing machine. FML I agree, your life sucks 32633 You deserved it 6188 146 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By nightmare ass Today, I let out the most vile, nose-melting dairy curdling fart of my life. The sound didn’t wake me up. But the nightmare I had from how rank smelling it was sure did. My own fart ruined my sleep. FML I agree, your life sucks 1446 You deserved it 382 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 3/12/2020 02:02 Heartbreaking Today, I ran into a childhood friend for the first time in years. It turned out her mother died of COVID a few days ago. It was heartbreaking to see her close to tears all the time we talked, but due to distancing I couldn't even hug her to make her feel better. FML I agree, your life sucks 1222 You deserved it 103 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By grossed out - United States - Mount Prospect Today, I was at my aunt and uncle's house. I went to the bathroom and after I washed my hands, I took a Q-tip out of the carton to clean my ears. When I reached for a second one, I noticed that every Q-tip in the carton was actually already used. FML I agree, your life sucks 50153 You deserved it 8224 73 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By footstuck - United States - Winterville Today, I superglued the sole back into my shoe. Unfortunately, the glue didn't dry as quickly as it said it would on the bottle. The glue seeped through the sole and my foot got superglued to my shoe. FML I agree, your life sucks 43439 You deserved it 12564 91 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada - Oshawa Today, I caught my sister eating crayons. She's 19. FML I agree, your life sucks 43674 You deserved it 3134 106 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I was forced to spend New Years Eve with my strict/conservative parents in the middle of nowhere in Illinois. If I had nothing else, I looked forward to watching the ball drop in NYC. As the seconds counted down the T.V. shut off. Parental controls shut down cable at midnight. FML I agree, your life sucks 38186 You deserved it 2853 93 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By wtfkasey - Canada - Dundas Today, I walked in on a raccoon viciously tearing apart a giant bag of dog food, not five feet away from my sleeping dog. FML I agree, your life sucks 26090 You deserved it 1972 44 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By anonymous - United States - Waxhaw Today, my son became convinced that his father cheated and we put the fertilized egg inside me to cover the whole thing up. He won't stop calling me "host mother". FML I agree, your life sucks 23983 You deserved it 2020 99 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By sadguy - Czech Republic Today, I decided to propose to my girlfriend on the Charles Bridge in Prague. A little boy thought it would be fun to chase a flock of pigeons towards me. I freaked out and dropped the 2 carat diamond ring. Into the river. FML I agree, your life sucks 60617 You deserved it 10939 130 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Bathroom Problems - France Today, while at work I went to use the public restroom because I had a severe case of diarrhea. All went well until the timed sensor lights went off and I couldn't leave my stall to get them back on. I sat there for thirty minutes in pure darkness. FML I agree, your life sucks 27638 You deserved it 3917 71 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FriutlessApple - United Kingdom Today, feeling bored and lonely, I drove into town to wander around the shops and go to Subway for lunch. While there, I picked up two trays and put one on the opposite side of the table, along with some of my rubbish, to make it look like I was with someone. FML I agree, your life sucks 37465 You deserved it 11036 53 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By notsoskinny - United States Today, I told my boyfriend that I gained a few pounds and thought I looked fat. He replied that I looked the same and that I shouldn't worry because he likes fat girls. I never thought I was fat before this. FML I agree, your life sucks 48847 You deserved it 18573 142 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By parishiltonsbff - United States Today, I realized that I know more about Paris Hilton's cervix than how my government is run. FML I agree, your life sucks 8457 You deserved it 40545 60 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I went on a third date with this guy, hoping I'd finally get some action. I got a high five. FML I agree, your life sucks 39931 You deserved it 10568 147 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By gemma - United Kingdom - Belfast Today, I figured out how serious my weight problem really is when my boyfriend had to lift a fat roll before he could enter me. FML I agree, your life sucks 15752 You deserved it 59192 268 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By sexyconvo - United States Today, I tried to convince my boyfriend to come over, telling him it would be "worth his time." He asked, "How?" I said, "Dazzling conversation of course. Just kidding, you'll probably get laid." He replied, "Oh. Well I would if it was for the conversation." FML I agree, your life sucks 23369 You deserved it 7339 61 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Lunar-Spice Today, I asked one of the girls at work out on a date. She responded by filing a harassment complaint. Now, I can't speak to her at all without being written up. FML I agree, your life sucks 1410 You deserved it 909 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FuckPollen - United Kingdom - Hartlepool Today, I attended a work interview. My hay fever has been flaring up during the hot weather, causing my throat to swell up and make me short of breath, which I explained. The woman interviewing me told me I was unsuccessful, as customers wouldn't be able to understand someone with my 'disability'. FML I agree, your life sucks 24816 You deserved it 1887 63 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By obviously a scumbag criminal Today, I took a drug test for probation and failed a category called "tricyclic antidepressants". The tablet of Benadryl I took last night for sleep assistance caused me to violate my probation. FML I agree, your life sucks 3912 You deserved it 567 35 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Grounded - United States Today, I told my mom I was going on a date tonight. She laughed and didn't believe me. When I tried to convince her it was real, she got mad and grounded me for lying. I had to cancel the date. FML I agree, your life sucks 41152 You deserved it 3831 91 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By 5minsolder - United States Today, I found out that even though my sister and I are identical twins, I'm known as "The ugly one". FML I agree, your life sucks 41273 You deserved it 3607 125 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Discouraged - Canada - Newmarket Today, my brother admitted that he decides whether he will date a girl or not based on the number of likes she gets on her selfies. We share the same blood. FML I agree, your life sucks 34523 You deserved it 3489 86 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By inheritance - Denmark - Lyngby Delayed Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said, "Sure, but not yet." As we've been together for five years, I was a bit confused, but she cleared that up with, "Not until your dad has died, I don't want him to ruin my wedding with a bad toast." FML I agree, your life sucks 39039 You deserved it 3405 103 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By hopeless-.- - United States Today, my boyfriend came in to kiss me. Being sweaty and nasty, I said "Not now, I'm hot and sweaty." He looked at me blankly and said "So am I, just smell my ball sweat." FML I agree, your life sucks 31075 You deserved it 7449 63 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - New Zealand Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a rubber duck. FML I agree, your life sucks 35111 You deserved it 9742 203 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Kasey Eames - United States - Oceanside Today, I told my husband to tell me his wildest fantasy. He told me it was to put on fake antlers and "do it like deer". FML I agree, your life sucks 40745 You deserved it 8355 116 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By dumbfriend - United States Today, I was talking to a group of friends about the various problems in Africa. One of them interrupts me and asks with a straight face, "If it's so bad over there, why don't they all just leave?" FML I agree, your life sucks 26716 You deserved it 4043 289 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By shaft2112 - Germany - Emsdetten Today, I was walking on my crutches towards the bus through the rain. The bus driver looked into my eyes, punching the button to close the doors while I was still a few meters away. As he drove off, he kept his eyes on me, while I had to wait for another 15 minutes for the next bus in the rain. FML I agree, your life sucks 23340 You deserved it 1435 59 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By creeper-status - United States - Irvine Today, I made a new friend at my college campus, which was great, until I added him on Facebook and he started liking posts from 3 years ago, asking if he could be my "dirty little secret" because he knows that I have a boyfriend. FML I agree, your life sucks 12055 You deserved it 955 23 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By optimist - United States Today, after wondering why I didn't receive a grade for a summer course I took in 2007, I realized that I gave the professor the wrong student ID number. Someone else received credit. I've been waiting on this grade for 8 months in order to graduate. FML I agree, your life sucks 15643 You deserved it 30951 60 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By smellychick - United States - Hesperia Today, my boyfriend dumped me for being a "cheating whore" when he found men’s deodorant in my bathroom cabinet. I just have abnormally strong B.O. and men’s deodorant works better for me. According to him, "No girl sweats that much." FML I agree, your life sucks 5031 You deserved it 282 23 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 11/1/2021 17:00 Mixed results Today, I realized that in the 3 and half month relationship with a wonderful guy I truly like, so far I've masturbated more than the whole year I was single before I met him. FML I agree, your life sucks 754 You deserved it 216 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By nograd4mee - Germany Today, I held a presentation about my masters thesis. Turns out, my professor never ever actually read the drafts I'd given him, but decided to rip me to pieces in front of everyone, saying that the topic isn't worth researching. I've been working on it for six months. FML I agree, your life sucks 37059 You deserved it 2703 103 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Cincinnati Today, I noticed a rash of insect bites on the backs of my thighs and buttocks. Upon further investigation, it appears that the inside of the chair in my work cubicle is infested with bedbugs. I'm too paranoid to sit in any work chair now. There are 12 hours left in my shift. FML I agree, your life sucks 27198 You deserved it 1849 82 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, while at the urinal doing my business, my trousers fell all the way to the ground. As I bent down to pull them back up, my boss walked in the bathroom and thought I was mooning him. FML I agree, your life sucks 27864 You deserved it 3784 60 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, as I was driving in reverse, I hit my boyfriend's mom's car. I met her for the first time while giving her my information. FML I agree, your life sucks 30872 You deserved it 7868 136 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Picaresque - United States Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML I agree, your life sucks 285081 You deserved it 67752 323 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By colton_colton | 49 #6069743 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:14 Thats something you could've lived a nice, long life without ever seeing 213 5 Reply
By MzZombicidal | 36 #6069748 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:17 I would just delete Facebook after that. Send a private message 100 8 Reply
By paperman84 | 7 #6069741 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:14 And why is it FML for you? A man is as old as he feels. Send a private message 1 3 Reply
By colton_colton | 49 #6069743 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:14 Thats something you could've lived a nice, long life without ever seeing 213 5 Reply
Reply BigLatchZatch | 14 #6069885 - Saturday 20 September 2014 19:26 I don't know what you were expecting OP. Grandpa + Facebook = bad Send a private message 26 1 Reply
Reply LittleBells | 17 #6069988 - Saturday 20 September 2014 20:23 More like Grandparents+Internet=Bad Send a private message 22 3 Reply
Reply naajster | 14 #6070079 - Saturday 20 September 2014 22:05 FML should seriously consider having an old people category Send a private message 22 1 Reply
By Liamj774 | 36 #6069744 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:14 They get to love too, you know. Send a private message 73 12 Reply
Reply cadillacgal79 | 32 #6069794 - Saturday 20 September 2014 17:02 But they don't need to post it on Facebook. Send a private message 47 4 Reply
Reply Steve95401 | 49 #6069824 - Saturday 20 September 2014 18:07 A lot of things are posted on Facebook that we don't need to see or know about. Send a private message 43 1 Reply
Reply RedPillSucks | 31 #6069984 - Saturday 20 September 2014 20:17 At least they didn't post nude photos Send a private message 17 1 Reply
Reply shay_serendipity | 29 #6069993 - Saturday 20 September 2014 20:26 Yet. Send a private message 24 1 Reply
Reply sayyestothedress | 24 #6070260 - Sunday 21 September 2014 2:37 OP I suggest that you brainwash yourself. Send a private message 4 1 Reply
Reply cheshireau | 26 #6070449 - Sunday 21 September 2014 12:14 Bleach his brain. Send a private message 2 1 Reply
Reply B3thyB3thy | 5 #6072979 - Wednesday 24 September 2014 15:55 # 33 no one should Send a private message 0 1 Reply
Reply B3thyB3thy | 5 #6072985 - Wednesday 24 September 2014 16:01 sorry # 22...damn Send a private message 0 1 Reply
By MzZombicidal | 36 #6069748 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:17 I would just delete Facebook after that. Send a private message 100 8 Reply
Reply MasonDude | 16 #6069750 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:18 OP can just delete the post from his timeline. Send a private message 6 14 Reply
Reply MzZombicidal | 36 #6069752 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:20 I'd still rather not risk seeing something like that again. Lol. I'd say just remove his grandparents but if they're like mine, they'll make you feel guilty. :P Send a private message 18 5 Reply
Reply IndefiniteBeauty | 17 #6069757 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:23 Hide all their post or just unfollow without unfriending them Send a private message 18 3 Reply
Reply Nordrag | 26 #6069783 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:48 Stuff like this makes me glad I don't even have a facebook in the first place. Send a private message 23 4 Reply
By CoGhostRider | 31 #6069751 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:19 Back in my day Facebook was for college kids. Send a private message 47 4 Reply
Reply Tthug | 34 #6069815 - Saturday 20 September 2014 17:45 Yup. But harvesting data is too profitable to only restrict it to a few people. The more people, the more greenbacks. Send a private message 5 11 Reply
Reply Cwilson3388 | 11 #6069817 - Saturday 20 September 2014 17:48 That was on The Chive yesterday! KCCO Send a private message 2 10 Reply
By youngbuck10 | 9 #6069759 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:24 That is just hilarious to me! Bad grandpa! Send a private message 34 4 Reply
By crushcrusher | 33 #6069762 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:26 that's disturbing. Send a private message 8 4 Reply
By QQMorePlox | 18 #6069763 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:26 At least you know they're love is still strong Send a private message 29 4 Reply
Reply EternalRest | 5 #6070426 - Sunday 21 September 2014 9:56 Thei- nevermind, I'm not a jerk. Send a private message 6 2 Reply
By odod777 | 28 #6069765 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:29 Why is your grandpa friends with you on facebook? Send a private message 2 34 Reply
Reply almightyteapot | 8 #6070082 - Saturday 20 September 2014 22:05 Because he is op's grandpa? Why wouldn't he be? Send a private message 9 0 Reply
Reply killerdana | 19 #6071127 - Monday 22 September 2014 7:05 If my grandparents were on facebook I'd be friends with them Send a private message 3 0 Reply
By WCARlover | 34 #6069766 - Saturday 20 September 2014 16:30 Quick, hide him from your newsfeed...that is, if you're ever gonna go on facebook again after that Send a private message 7 13 Reply
Today, I woke up with a sore clitoris. I haven't had sex with my boyfriend for weeks, but I did masturbate yesterday. I guess I can't get horny without... I agree, your life sucks 232 You deserved it 43 3 Comments
Today, my dad asked my mom to flash him. He didn't forget I was in the room, he just couldn't be bothered to wait. My mom obliged. FML I agree, your life sucks 616 You deserved it 82 4 Comments