Today, I was talking to my guy friend on the phone. He said, "You sound depressed, I should cheer you up and give you a big hug." Jokingly, I responded, "You wouldn't hug something as gross as me." His response? "You'd be surprised." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I jokingly went over to a an attractive female co-worker and said, "You look like you need a hug". She told me she wasn't feeling well and didn't want to be touched. No more than 30 seconds after our encounter, she ran to give one of our more attractive male co-workers a hug. FML
Today, I was cuddling with the guy I'm dating and said, "You smell good." His response, "You don't." FML
Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. Everything seemed to be going well, when all of a sudden he turned to look at me with a pensive and thoughtful expression. I expected him to say something important, but instead he just said, "I was wondering, how does it feel to be fat?" FML
Today, my boyfriend grabbed my love handles. It tickled, so I giggled and squirmed out of his grip. He looked at me quizzically and said, "I'm surprised you still have feeling there with all that fat." FML
Today, I ended up talking to a homeless man and bought him a meal. In return, he hugged me and groped my ass. FML
Today, I was talking to this guy that I like a lot and I think he likes me back. When he told me I was beautiful I laughed so hard that I farted. Loudly. FML
Today, a guy started complimenting me and calling me beautiful. Halfway through, he burst out laughing and said he couldn't do it. Who needs self confidence, anyway? FML
Today, I weighed myself for the first time in a while and confirmed that I have put on a few pounds. I was feeling a bit down about it. I went to work and on arriving a workmate I hadn't seen in a while gave me a hug. She said, "I love hugging you, you're so nice and squishy." FML
Today, I went over to my friend's house. After knocking on the door, I was greeted by her hairy, 300+ pound father in his underwear. He then hugged me. FML
Today, my friend was complaining about how fat she was. To make her feel better I said, "Psh, you're not fat! In fact we're about the same weight!" She looked at me for a second, then burst into tears sobbing, "I'm fat! I'm fat!" FML
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Top comments
d_hoffryn 0
That's what you get for fishing I'm afraid.
reset_button 0
YDI for fishing for compliments
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Comments (96)
jonnymohio 2
Self-pity is a turnoff. Stop it or he'll remain just a "friend".
Weil 0
At least you like Pokémon.
doggylover27 0
That's nice, he sounds worried about you, and you put yourself out there to get hurt by saying something like that, so you deserve it when you get that kind of response.
corporalusmc 0
that's what you get for bein gross.
HurriKaty 4
1. He was probably just joking. 2. WTF did you expect, you're the one that said it in the first place. 3. How the hell is this an FML?
didi666_fml 0
"1- You deserved what you THOUGHT was a diss, when you were fishing for compliments. 2- You also deserve what you THOUGHT was a diss, because you don't work out and are ugly/fat probably. 3- Most importantly: This actually was NOT a bad thing! YES he meant for you to take it as a joking diss, but in reality he is shy and is trying to get this message across to you (listen up good, ok?): Him: "I am sort of desperate. Even though you're not that cute and everybody knows it, I like your personality and yes I'm clearly desperate. I hope that this hug can turn into something more, as in maybe a relationship." ============== Yes thats sharpshooting, but its the most likely option" Thanks for putting everything I thought in simple words I could not find!!! Best post Ive seen in a long time on any type of forum/blog
flyingpan8 0
that's what you get for being self depricating! jeez, you really piss me off. why do you say something bad about yourself, and then expect people to wipe your snot off for you? as much as i sadly understand your illogical psyche of wanting others to negate all the bad things you say about yourself so that you will feel better about yourself....i would strongly urge adopting a more positive view on life! it will help you and those who make up your life!
memyselfand 0
Ydi for lowering your confidence Y would u make fun of ur self ????????
ithedarkknight 0
Damn way to have no self esteem. Lol for dudes thats not really attractive for a girl to have no self esteem. Its like saying hey walk all over me like a door mat everyone. And speaking from a dudes stand point they will. So even if you are ugly stop whining about it and try some ways to make your self look good. Dont do it for me or for your friend do it for your damn self. Im a dude and i make sure everymorning and night i wash and masturize my face take showers get a haircut press my clothes and try to look good everywhere i go why cus i care about my self not what other people think.
dynamics_xx 0
You masturize your face? LOL. Not trying to be a douche people spell shit wrong all the time but I read this and saw ********** your face. I was like wtf dude. But seriously not being a bitch I just lol'ed.. :P Oh, and good for you for taking care of yourself! All men should try and look their best :)
ktwithcurls 0
Ugh! This fml bothered me so much I had to join. While it may sound to you, a person with devastatingly low self esteem, that he was insulting you he actually was not imo. It's not that he's saying that you're ugly. rather, he's confirming that he would like to hug you to make you feel better! "you'd be surprised" as in he still wants to hug you. While I see your point of view I really don't feel like it's the case AT ALL. Honestly, he may even have a thing for you..or he may have just been trying to just cheer you up with a joke. Guys aren't your girlfriends and they're not going to react the way that you expect and sometimes even want them to. It it the way of being in a relationship with a male.