Today, I was getting a pedicure to cheer myself up. I've been so lonely, I got overly excited when someone sat next to me, because I got to pretend I had a friend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I didn't mind paying a little bit extra for my manicure because I forgot how nice it was to have someone hold your hand. Even if it was an old Asian lady. FML
Today, I felt so affection-deprived that I gave myself pep talks in order to feel less lonely. FML
Today, I felt so lonely that I went on an online chat website and pretended to be a girl just so someone would talk to me. FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure, and they used some sort of scrubby thing that really tickled my feet. When I couldn't take it any more, I accidentally kicked the lady who was doing my nails in the face. FML
Today, I was so lonely, I dragged out a conversation with a lady who called to get me to make an appointment to give blood. FML
Today, I went to get a pedicure for the first time. My feet are VERY ticklish. I reflexively kicked the poor lady in the face, as I wet my pants. FML
Today, feeling bored and lonely, I drove into town to wander around the shops and go to Subway for lunch. While there, I picked up two trays and put one on the opposite side of the table, along with some of my rubbish, to make it look like I was with someone. FML
Today, I decided to treat myself to a pedicure ahead of my cousin's wedding. The woman doing my nails asked if I wanted my toe hairs trimmed. I was so taken aback and embarrassed that I said yes. They charged me extra. FML
Today, I went to get my nails done for the first time in a while. I don't like to go that much because two of my toes are connected, and I'm very self-conscious about it. The man painting my toes started laughing when he saw them and called all the other employees over to look. FML
Today, I was so lonely that I pretended I wanted to buy something from a telemarketer so that they would keep talking to me. FML
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Top comments
drayloon 50
Have a conversation with them, maybe you can make a friend. Can't hurt to try
EvilTurtle 35
You've got a friend in me
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Comments (74)
jeanyrios 10
I understand. I'd like to say that I have been there but the reality is that I am still there.
chrisxja 8
We can all be your friends!
EvilLittleMan 23
Hell... we are all friends here on FML. Some just may be plain bat shit crazy but those are the ones that create the funniest friendship memories.
worldclassrager 41
Don't pretend make a friend... Hey that rhymed....
WasabiMars 21
I'll be your friend OP. :)
rayman173 2
That sucks I'm sorry what wrong to make you feel so lonely? I hope your able to find friends soon a life without them is miserable.
tongueblisters 1
i was so excited to see that you were in OHIO cause i moved to OHIO and don't have any friends here either. let's be friends please
interesting33 37
Hey try 7 cups of tea - it's a website :) for people who want to chat to someone Take care OP. there's also Arches
interesting33 37
Sorry scrap the arches bit but try campaign to end loneliness
iAisu 7
Strike a conversation OP! You'll have friends in no time. ^^
WattledParsley 11
Well, it sounds like you nailed it.