Today, I was at my best friend's house, listening to him complain about his mother remembering all the bad stuff he did when he was in high school. I jokingly said, "An elephant never forgets." Guess who was behind me. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I accidentally let slip to my mom that I hardly remember the graduation party she threw me four years ago. She proceeded to verbally assault me for forgetting the special occasion. I had a brain complication two years ago which resulted in some memory loss. Apparently, it's my fault. FML
Today, I was in the car with my mom. We were discussing my brother, how he's been screwing up majorly lately and she blamed it on his friends. Then she turned to me and said, "It's a good thing you've never had any friends." FML
Today, my dad had fun embarrassing me as much as possible in my parent-teacher conference by moaning whenever the teacher talked. FML
Today, an old friend of my mom's yelled at me for "ignoring" her. I wasn't responding because she was getting my name wrong, so I assumed she was referring to someone else. FML
Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML
Today, I posted a meme which said "I don't know where some people learned their inside voices, but it must have been in a helicopter with running chainsaws." My mom laughed at it. I didn't have the strength nor the bravery to tell her that it was meant for her. Then my dad laughed at it. It was also meant for him. FML
Today, my best friend promised me that she'd be there after a rough night the night before. Hours later, I did some digging and found out that she went ahead and called another group of friends behind my back, and then told me to stop being a baby when I figured it out. FML
Today, I was talking to my best friend about how much of an asshole my ex-boyfriend is. After about 2 hours of non-stop bitching, it turns out she's actually dating him. FML
Today, I accidently accepted a lunch invitation from an old friend, because I forgot what they're like. Here comes another hour and a half monologue about how great they are. FML
Today, my coworker was talking to me about how there's always that one person in a group of friends that everyone secretly dislikes and laughs at. I realized that that person is me. FML
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Top comments
gearhead369 20
And she will never forget you said that either
James_is_Mexican 25
Well I'd say you'd have to talk about the elephant in the room but sounds like you already did...
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Comments (34)
sarcasmwins 24
Your ass is marked by that elephant for life now.
Carebeareatu 23
Careful or big mama is gonna stampede on you!
cheshireau 26
Not the best choice of phrase but how could you know she was near by?
xluciferx666 21
Crikey now as you can see the momma elephant is quite agitated and may very well charge
katydid91 31
I just read that in an Australian accent.
xsydneyx123 28
You deserve whatever happened. Honestly? That was rude. How would you feel if your friend spoke of your mother like that?
midnightm16 24
I don't know why you're being down voted. I agree with you. My friends and I know better than to say things like that about each other's parents. It's just rude and disrespectful. Regardless if they are complaining.
xsydneyx123 28
#25 Thank you so much! I'm not sure why I'm being down voted either. That's okay. I posted my opinion. People can agree with it or not. But I appreciate your defense. (: #23 and other down voters, I'm not fishing for up votes. Whether OP's friend was talking about his mom or not, what OP said was rude. They were welcomed into their friend's mother's home and then they were both very disrespectful. So I've stated my opinion. YDI and I'm standing by that.
iiTzNeeNerz 26
I'm guessing the elephant in the room finally made a sound, huh?
rockwrench 18
Best to lay low for a while, cause when mama ain't happy, nobody's happy.
tonedef456 8
You could say that you were talking about the elephant in the room.
trickster91420 21
to kill....
worldclassrager 41
They have an elephant as a pet? That's neat...wait...sorry mom