Today, I was acting as Prince Charming for a 5 year old's birthday...

Today, I was acting as Prince Charming for a 5 year old's birthday party. After my scene at the ball, the narrator asked the kids, "Was the Prince handsome?" and they all replied with a chorus of "Nooooo!" FML

By FML Team - 6/1/2010 18:01

FML (h)ate kids

Not our kids, but we hate kids. For example, today we were in the library, checking out Tinkerbell's biography, when what we thought...

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By prince-charming / Saturday 7 November 2009 10:12 / Kuwait

Work

Rock, hard place

White line fever

Business savvy

By - 12/1/2017 20:00

Today, after 3 years of unemployment and 6 months of hard studying, I found out I hadn't actually registered myself for the public service exam that will happen later this month and could finally get me a job. FML

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5400

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By gonkc - 4/3/2009 07:05 - United States

Today, to remind myself to write a check for my speech and debate team (Lynbrook Speech and Debate), I wrote "LSD money" on the back of my hand. The Vice Principal saw it, dragged me to the office, and called my parents. FML

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53669

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By Anonymous - 4/7/2012 18:01 - United States

Today, I called my mom to see how she was doing. She quickly hijacked the conversation and said that she's signed me up for a dating site, because she feels bad that I can't find a decent man. I've been dating my boyfriend for seven months, and she's seen me with him multiple times. FML

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26389

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By Anonymous - 18/12/2010 21:26 - United States

Today, I finally moved all my boxes into my new apartment. I was settling in when my alarm clock that was stashed in one of the boxes began ringing. Two hours and several boxes later, I still can't find it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26610

You deserved it

5757

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By anonymous - 17/7/2014 02:46 - United States - Romulus

Today, while working as a barista, a customer yelled about her muffins and butter not being ready since she only had a "short time to eat". There were 7 tip giving customers ahead of her, but I rushed her order. She gave no tip and stayed for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks

43853

You deserved it

5197

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By Gary - 16/7/2019 20:30

Today, after countless failed rejections and derision from women, I've realized that the only time I experience any sort of happiness is when I'm eating. They say there's someone out there for all of us, but maybe that's not true. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1525

You deserved it

237

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By Anonymous - 29/7/2015 12:04 - United States - Camden

Today, my sister and I were planning a trip to get away from things and visit some faraway friends. My dad then decided to insert himself into our plans. He got mad when we said no, and couldn't understand why we wanted to go by ourselves. FML

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By well i'm fucked - 3/2/2014 22:47 - United States - Aberdeen

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks basically threatened to kill herself if I don't start thinking about having a child with her soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks

60994

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By Connor - 25/12/2010 18:33 - United States

Today, I spent the morning in the ER with a broken arm. My little brother was in such a rush to get his presents first, that he violently shoved me out of the way on the stairs. FML

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30928

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By Alice - 28/8/2013 10:33 - United States - Happy Valley

Today, my neighbor's daughter started learning how to play the trombone. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46020

You deserved it

5363

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By Christina - 29/6/2012 05:31 - United States - Aurora

Today, my mother decided to share with me that my father is impotent, and they hadn't had sex in a year and a half. Thanks, Mom. I can never unhear that. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28298

You deserved it

3070

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By Anonymous - 10/12/2019 01:00

Pleasant smell

Today, while watching TV in my dorm, I clearly heard my roommate yell to someone proudly, "I've only taken a shower 4 or 5 times since I've been here." He's been my roommate for four months. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1783

You deserved it

179

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By Disney - 18/2/2011 22:29 - United States

Today, I found out that to save on expenses, my wife booked a very small hotel room for ourselves and the kids while we visit Disney World. I've been officially cockblocked by Mickey Mouse. FML

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38055

You deserved it

8374

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By Anonymous - 21/8/2011 20:18 - United States

Today, I married the man of my dreams. At the after-party, my psycho grandma stood up, called for quiet, and engaged in a long rant about how this was "the beginning of the end" and advising everyone that the secret to a successful marriage is "cheating, plain and simple". FML

I agree, your life sucks

35152

You deserved it

3120

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By catherineratley - 6/5/2012 04:09 - United States - Carmi

Today, I shut my finger in the car door. The door locked. Then I dropped the keys on the ground and couldn't reach them. FML

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35313

You deserved it

2965

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By ZiggyTink - 9/7/2015 03:24 - United States - North Branch

Today, my boyfriend's brother and fiancé decided to preach to me about how I need to read the Bible because I'm agnostic. I'd be fine if it wasn't coming from two 19-year-olds who dated for 5 months, got pregnant, got engaged, lost the baby, and still wanna get married, "so they don't look bad." FML

I agree, your life sucks

27376

You deserved it

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By Anonymous - 28/7/2009 01:20 - United States

Today, I was sitting in a coffee shop when the weird guy who had been pacing the store talking to himself approached our table. He looked at me, and in all seriousness, said, "I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but your butt crack is showing." FML

I agree, your life sucks

17219

You deserved it

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By John Doe - 29/1/2015 17:01 - United States - Columbia

Today, my parents continue comparing me to my "perfect" friend. He smokes dope, is a compulsive thief, and has gone to juvie numerous times. I'm passing school with flying colors and have never been in any trouble with the law. Apparently I should be more like him. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31847

You deserved it

2371

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By "Jester94752" - 15/3/2019 16:00

Today, a co-worker who lives 30 minutes out of my way had broken down so I picked him up. We were both 5 minutes late and both got fired. Our department takes 30-60 minutes to even start running. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2225

You deserved it

139

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By drpepperking10 - 2/7/2016 23:27 - United States

Today, I was kissing my crush for the first time and her tooth fell out into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks

16193

Phew, glad it wasn't me

3232

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By soph511 - 30/7/2012 18:05 - France - Hy?res

Today, I woke up to find my cat has gone into heat. Her favorite thing to do right now is sticking her ass in my face and howling like a Nazgûl. FML

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24455

You deserved it

4633

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By Anonymous - 13/8/2019 06:00

Today, like every day for the past year or so, I went for a walk. And like every time I go for a walk, I got severely winded halfway through. I have no medical issues like asthma, I’m just out of shape. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1087

You deserved it

711

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By thatoneperson - 17/2/2012 12:43 - United States

Today, I discovered that you can't always assume your little brother is kidding when he says that you have a spider on top of your head. FML

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27302

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By Anonymous - 13/6/2014 09:27 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I had dinner for the first time with my boyfriend's parents. It was awkward enough without his mom asking, "So, what do you do for fun, besides my son?" FML

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51605

You deserved it

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By Anonymous - 30/9/2017 13:00

Today, workers came to my house to fix residual moisture damage in my walls left behind by Hurricane Irma. Said workers then burst a water pipe and flooded my entire apartment in the time it took figure out how to turn it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3466

You deserved it

194

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By BadGirlfriend12 - 30/7/2010 02:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend actually offered me $1000 to break up with him, and to move back to where my family lives 5 hours away. FML

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41283

You deserved it

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By unluckymiss - 24/1/2010 06:03 - United States

Today, I was at the store when I ran into an old friend from high school. He didn't recognize me at first, but when I told him who I was, he instantly shouted "Oh! Yeah! The fat chick from Mr. H's class!" FML

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You deserved it

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By Anonymous - 22/6/2016 12:36 - Hungary - Budapest

Today, I had a horrible case of the flu. I have a fever of 102 degrees and I can't breathe through my nose. Choosing to sleep it off turns out to be enough for my mom to call me a lazy fuck and scream at me for doing nothing all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks

14221

Phew, glad it wasn't me

1407

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By Anonymous - 8/8/2009 22:16 - United States

Today, I drunkenly made out with my 65 year-old married female boss. I'm a 21 year-old male intern. I have a feeling work will be awkward tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks

13510

You deserved it

68842

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By reb2632 - 29/5/2009 20:13 - United States

Today, I picked up my 4-year-old daughter from day care. As we're driving home, a butterfly lands on the windshield. Just as my daughter comments on how pretty the butterfly is, I turned a corner and accidentally hit the windshield wipers and smeared the pretty butterfly across the windshield. FML

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50948

You deserved it

12680

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By Abandoned - 9/3/2009 05:50 - United States

Today, I tried to surprise my parents by coming home from college for Spring Break. I arrived to find a dark house, with all the doors bolted shut. After calling them, I found out that they have gone on a vacation to Hawaii for a week. I am now locked out of my own house, with no where to stay. FML

I agree, your life sucks

50666

You deserved it

13425

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By Deweyboy - 30/10/2016 04:23

Today, since I needed someone to talk to about it, I told my girlfriend how my dad was recently diagnosed with diabetes. My girlfriend's mother then told me, in graphic detail, how her father's diabetes led to his toes being hacked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9639

You deserved it

702

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By Anonymous - 16/10/2015 17:12 - United States - Eagle River

Today, four days after moving into my new house, I woke up to a guy yelling "Fuck you, Claire" followed by a brick smashing through my living room window. Now I know why Claire was so eager to finalize the sale. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27174

You deserved it

1551

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By olalala2382 - 2/4/2009 05:09 - United States

Today, as I worked the drive-through at Wendy's, the hottest girl from my math class pulled up to the window. As I handed her the drink, I asked her what she thought of our math test today. She screamed "How did you know I had a math test, you creep!", threw the drink at me, and drove off. FML

I agree, your life sucks

91886

You deserved it

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By give me an F - 5/1/2014 16:16 - United Kingdom - Corby

Today, was my first day as a male cheerleader in an attempt to flirt. The girls were stronger than me and it's now my job to be thrown in the air by girls. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45596

You deserved it

37371

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By weirdo - 21/2/2010 08:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend wanted me to send him a pic of myself being happy for his phone's caller ID. So I picked out a picture where I'm grinning a big grin, clearly very happy like he asked. He replies back, "You look weird there. Send a pretty one." FML

I agree, your life sucks

26169

You deserved it

4998

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By Anonymous - 5/11/2009 22:14 - United States

Today, I finally finished my art project which was worth 50% of my quarterly grade. I came in 1st period to give it to her. When she turned to look at it, her elbow hit her coffee and spilled it all over the canvas. I got 60%. She said I would have had a 100%, except for the giant coffee stain. FML

I agree, your life sucks

63446

You deserved it

3470

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By Anonymous - 21/10/2014 15:37 - Australia

Today, my parents told me off for reading, as opposed to watching TV like the rest of the family, because it was "anti-social". FML

I agree, your life sucks

37077

You deserved it

2813

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By Anonymous - 24/10/2018 14:00

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. When she saw the ring, she got so excited that she ran to kiss me and it flew out of my hand, over the balcony of our suite, and fell roughly 45 stories straight down. I could feel my wallet screaming as a £4000 diamond vanished into the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3627

You deserved it

464

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By badhairday - 26/12/2011 01:38 - United States

Today, after months of her begging me, I let my girlfriend cut my hair for the first time. It turned out so badly that we are now "taking a break until it looks normal again." FML

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31584

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Top comments

By perdix | 29

#659476 - Saturday 7 November 2009 19:51

But the Prince had lots of money, so all the "princesses" found him Charming enough.

"Stop being dandy, showing me you're handsome"

By papadugg | 0

#659513 - Saturday 7 November 2009 20:01

Kids are really literal~probably thought narrator meant "Prince Handsome". Follow it up with "was the Prince Charming?" and you'd get a "YES!"

Comments

By perdix | 29

#659476 - Saturday 7 November 2009 19:51

But the Prince had lots of money, so all the "princesses" found him Charming enough.

"Stop being dandy, showing me you're handsome"

blackie123 | 0

#659487 - Saturday 7 November 2009 19:54

good song ^.^

boredperson | 0

#664935 - Wednesday 11 November 2009 2:20

dude kids don't have raging hormones like the rest of us, also, who are you, a serial molester, to care about what kids think.

MissyWissyKach | 0

#763986 - Saturday 9 January 2010 15:11

i think the picture was cute :]

gwinsdavineraven | 0

#764680 - Saturday 9 January 2010 20:48

It's just a story so calm down...
Asshole

e3r4 | 0

#766172 - Sunday 10 January 2010 17:13

yeah dude. don't have to be a dick.

LOLSMILEYFACE331 | 0

#771251 - Wednesday 13 January 2010 2:44

Who cares.!!!? LITTLE KIDS ARE SO BLUNT..

WorldCupCheer | 0

#1000293 - Friday 21 May 2010 7:37

oh come on op they're 5

thatonek1d | 0

#1033334 - Thursday 17 June 2010 7:12

not an fml. ydi for playing a charcter who is nearly as big a douche as that bieber chick/guy. lol I type in bieber on my iPod and it change it to norbert

Celesta | 11

#1191955 - Thursday 5 August 2010 5:09

Yay an illustrated FML from Kuwait! ;p

By velvel | 7

#659479 - Saturday 7 November 2009 19:51

kids don't lie! too bad but... you'll live.

deathmajestic | 0

#766282 - Sunday 10 January 2010 18:50

oh yes they do

Tigg3r | 3

#766408 - Sunday 10 January 2010 20:23

oh god kids lie so much that they are telling the truth within a lie. Confusing aint it?

CarryOnAgainx | 0

#766654 - Sunday 10 January 2010 22:52

Ehh, you got "Kids don't lie!" from Shane Dawson.

Remegy | 3

#842653 - Thursday 11 February 2010 0:30

Nope; Shade Dawson got that from him DUH!

zmed | 0

#864966 - Wednesday 17 February 2010 9:22

uuuhhhh...what? since when?

By Starfire22 | 5

#659500 - Saturday 7 November 2009 19:57

even little kidsare repulsed by you!!

By f_me247 | 0

#659503 - Saturday 7 November 2009 19:58

YDI for not being charming.

analo_fml | 8

#764931 - Saturday 9 January 2010 23:56

who said he wasn't charming? you mean being handsome?

By papadugg | 0

#659513 - Saturday 7 November 2009 20:01

Kids are really literal~probably thought narrator meant "Prince Handsome". Follow it up with "was the Prince Charming?" and you'd get a "YES!"

sezza1987 | 0

#765829 - Sunday 10 January 2010 11:38

kids aren't stupid, they would have understood

Lim23 | 0

#856531 - Monday 15 February 2010 2:42

You'll be surprised...

By papahmarioulez | 0

#659565 - Saturday 7 November 2009 20:20

to the OP, if you really care enough about what 5 year olds think about the way you look, then your messed up

bartmasta | 0

#659699 - Saturday 7 November 2009 21:43

this

fatraptorjesus13 | 9

#2954672 - Saturday 23 July 2011 1:03

I'd care more about 5 year olds cause they're honest, Ppl older than middle school lie to hurt you so he's not messed up

By erowlyn | 0

#659715 - Saturday 7 November 2009 21:55

ouch fml indeed

By Mortanious | 0

#659725 - Saturday 7 November 2009 21:59

YDI for letting 5 year olds get to you, grow some balls bitch

franfran_fml | 0

#777161 - Saturday 16 January 2010 3:22

They probably didn't really care about what the kid said, they were just trying to get their story on FML, so calm down man.

Mr_Tuff_Guy | 0

#792796 - Saturday 23 January 2010 8:44

Ahahaha!

By lostfaithinpppl | 19

#659738 - Saturday 7 November 2009 22:06

Hahaha!!! Come on! They are kids. You are acting like a 5 year old yourself if you let it get to you :D

By gpstyne | 0

#659749 - Saturday 7 November 2009 22:13

you'll live