Today, I wanted revenge on the rabbit who ate my garden's plants. When he returned, he was standing next to my brand new above-ground swimming pool. I pull out my 22. rifle and shot at it, but the bullet missed and popped a hole in my pool. 15,000 gallons of water flooded my basement. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I heard a gunshot not too far from the house. This is not unusual, as I live way out in the boonies and hunters tend to roam the woods. What isn't normal is a stray bullet hitting my above-ground pool, which promptly split open and released a torrent of water that flooded my basement. FML
Today, while mowing my backyard, I messily discovered that a family of rabbits has been living out there in the tall grass. FML
Today, a few freshmen jumped my fence. They decided to take a dip in the pool, so I pulled out a paintball gun. I unloaded over 100 rounds, painting their backs bright yellow. It also dyed my pool yellow, and it'll apparently cost around $500 to repair. FML
Today, I wanted revenge on my neighbor, whose dog craps in my yard, so I spent a day at the dog park gathering up dog shit. I piled it up by the property line and ran over it with the mower, intending to spray his driveway and car with turds. Instead, it gummed up the mower. Now it stinks too bad to fix. FML
Today, my dog proudly brought home a rabbit he'd killed. The same rabbit that belongs to my neighbor's daughter. FML
Today, I was on my back patio talking with my husband. It got dark outside, and I saw something shuffling in the back yard. I freaked out so bad that I went to run inside, only to fly face-first into the screen door. Turns out the shuffling was a baby rabbit. FML
Today, my 6 ft snake got loose. I found it. It was in my neighbor's backyard, constricting their pet rabbit. FML
Today, I shot my boyfriend in the balls by mistake, twice. First it was a paintball gun I was using with my nephew, then it was a slingshot I use to scare away the bird who keeps eating fish from my pond. He is now sat icing his groin acting like I did it on purpose. FML
Today, I drove home on my birthday, and my mom said she'd meet me there. I was a little surprised to get home and find she wasn't there, but even more shocked to see my rabbit run over in my driveway. Turns out he'd gotten loose and my mom had run him over, panicked, and left. FML
Today, after I warned my son repeatedly that if he wanted a rabbit he had to clean and feed it, I checked on it. It wasn’t just dead, it was dead and rotting in a pool of its own pee and faeces. I yelled at him, but he just shrugged and told me rabbits are boring and he forgot it was even there. FML
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Top comments
narks 0
Not only did you try to kill it instead of just relocating it, but you tried to justify your shit aim with 'the bullet missed' instead of 'I missed'. This one calls for a YDI unfortunately.
tkmac 0
Sounds like a Tom & Jerry episode.
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Comments (868)
Tickle_Me_Kiki 0
I think you need some help. You should look into that.
amanda0 0
PETA would not be happy. i guess you could call it karma! you deserved that.
Program_fml 0
I don't blame you for wanting to kill the rabbit. I DO blame you for not seeing that one coming. A, you know, animal trap, like the ones that are sold at your local Wallmart, would probably have done the job with considerably less collateral damage. Plus, you wouldn't have had to wait around for the little bugger; just find him in the cage in the morning, drive out into the woods, and let him go/shoot him.
ZomgPiinkiie 0
YDI for trying to kill an adorable bunny, dickface
belladonna_1986 0
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My redneck grandpa does shit like that up in the backwoods from his kitchen window in his underwear! Just a glimpse into your future you f*ucktard! Poor bunny. What a dick lol
railguncannon 0
Op, YDI. Granola eaters, thanks for making one of my favorite websites into a political pissing contest. Yes the op is an idiot who gives a bad name to gun owners everywhere. One of the first things you learn in a gun safety program is to always be aware of what is in front of and behind your target. For forgetting that he should be beaten with a frozen tuna in Times Square. But come on people do you really think shooting a rabbit is so terrible? You do realize where your hamburgers and chicken nuggets come from right? Even you vegans who won't eat anything that casts a shadow still drive on roads that disrupt natural migratory patterns. You hand out flyers on paper made from the natural habitats of what you want to protect. You are an animal. An evolved form of omniverous primate with a particularly violent side. You have incisors that are specifically designed to grip, rip, and tear flesh. You don't negate these biological facts by choosing to eat soy and donating to the WWF. Stop pretending your lifestyle is on some pedestal. I eat meat, I hunt, and I don't have any fantasies about how wonderful a person my diet makes me.
dudemitch 0
hippies get fuct. id have done the same thing. but i wouldnt have missed ;] oh and 56 your a ******* idiot OMFG WABBITS ARE P3TTSSZZ!! not in my damn house. some people have pet mice and rats too, or spiders and snakes. doesnt mean that ALL rabbits or spiders or any animal for that matter is a pet. so shut the **** up and go to some protest. the 65455 people who voted YDI are all dumbasses.
humorizer 14
Dear hypocrites; For all you guys saying "boo hooo, you tried to kill a rabbit that's so wrong..." shut up. Why? Because I am sure that any of you who saw a spider walking on your wall or a little fly buzzing around would kill it without second thoughts. The only reason you feel bad is because they're relatively big and "cute" animals. I myself have been annoyed since this morning and unable to sleep because a fly kept buzzing around and hitting itself against the window. Most of you would have killed it on the spot. I for one try to respect animals' right to live, so I let it go on its way. Yes, I'm a bit of a loony perhaps for being nice to small animals/insects. But still, at least I'm fair and don't take "cuteness" or size into account. I only kill based on harm. Example: I leave ants alone unless they start invading my food stock (or begin to grow far too large in number in my house). I do feel kind of bad for blowing an ant off my laptop and letting it fall to the ground, a 4 foot drop). But... that's just me. And regarding the rabbit, in this instance, I suppose there was an instance of harm; in that it was going to destroy his garden. So if he took care of it humanely and made sure to kill it instead of maiming it, I suppose it works.
berettaguy17 0
i think we should all get together on different sides. the tree huggers and the realists(or dumb hicks as you call us) and brawl. i bet us "hicks" would kill every one of you *******
deja54 0
Heh, I'd have done the same thing. Just not without a huge thing of water behind it. LOL @ the "OMG CUTE RODENT" morons.