Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old daughter holding a lit lighter to the underside of a spoon, which was full of baking powder. She was trying to breathe in the fumes to get high, and later confessed that she thought it's how heroin is made and used. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML
Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML
Today, I walked in on my fifteen-year-old son and his friends attempting to set up a rudimentary meth lab in his bedroom. I'm not sure whether to be angrier that they simply tried this, or that they thought burning up baking soda would somehow produce methamphetamine. FML
Today, my teenage daughter nearly burned down our house because she wanted to take "artsy" pictures with a lighter for Instagram. FML
Today, my mother accused me of "cooking cocaine", after she found a slightly discoloured spoon in my room. FML
Today, my daughter threw a can of hairspray into the fireplace because she saw someone do it on YouTube. FML
Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my daughter trying to cut her wrist with a plastic spoon. When I asked her why, she said her friend Lucy did that so her parents would buy her pretty things. My daughter and Lucy are both four years old. FML
Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to tan herself with her regular desk lamp. She won't believe that it wouldn't give her a tan. She's 16 years old. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML
Today, my mum accused me of doing heroin because some teaspoons had gone missing. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I went out to neighbour's just down the street and left my 12 and 14 year-old daughters at home. The 12 year-old found the fire extinguisher and thought it was whipped cream, put it in her mouth, and tried to eat it. The 14 year-old didn't even bother to call us. Luckily, the 12 year-old is fine, the stuff was safe. FML
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Top comments
fsomelife 26
Go lighter on the kid, will you? She's the heroine of an FML! ...Sorry, too spoon?
ChakatBlackstar 29
What's worse? That she wanted to do drugs? Or that she sucked at doing drugs?
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Comments (127)
lovepink2013 2
she needs help and check into her friends are
Derpinallday 2
We're going to get you out of that school.
baref00tmama 15
She's clearly a moron. You should be concerned that the first drug she decided to try (that you know about!!) was the most addictive. I would encourage her to try a drug that causes sterility, though...for obvious reasons.
ThedaRose 15
This really isn't funny, sounds like you need to have a very serious talk with your daughter
an3ph 20
Thanks, Walter.
vffjvsegb 11
Ok so what's worse? The drugs or the stupidity?
plantedrabbit3 16
Good to know that this is what my generation has come to....
RavenCheyenneC 12
I'd beat her ass
SingleDT846_CRD 6
She got some potential. Lol...
Ferreesley 3
bad parenting because the child doesn't know how to make drugs? I'd be calling some bad parenting if she were doing it correctly. this is disturbing nonetheless. I definitely think taking her to a shelter so she can see what drugs do is a great idea. scare any further attempts out of her. it isn't great to exploit those who have suffered with the addiction but if it prevents her from ending up that way or worse, you might as well do it.