Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old daughter holding a lit lighter to the underside of a spoon, which was full of baking powder. She was trying to breathe in the fumes to get high, and later confessed that she thought it's how heroin is made and used. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML
Twisted firestarter
Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML
Now we cook
Today, I walked in on my fifteen-year-old son and his friends attempting to set up a rudimentary meth lab in his bedroom. I'm not sure whether to be angrier that they simply tried this, or that they thought burning up baking soda would somehow produce methamphetamine. FML
Today, my teenage daughter nearly burned down our house because she wanted to take "artsy" pictures with a lighter for Instagram. FML
Today, my mother accused me of "cooking cocaine", after she found a slightly discoloured spoon in my room. FML
Today, my daughter threw a can of hairspray into the fireplace because she saw someone do it on YouTube. FML
Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my daughter trying to cut her wrist with a plastic spoon. When I asked her why, she said her friend Lucy did that so her parents would buy her pretty things. My daughter and Lucy are both four years old. FML
Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to tan herself with her regular desk lamp. She won't believe that it wouldn't give her a tan. She's 16 years old. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML
ADMIT IT!
Today, my mum accused me of doing heroin because some teaspoons had gone missing. FML
Babysitters for hire
Today, my girlfriend and I went out to neighbour's just down the street and left my 12 and 14 year-old daughters at home. The 12 year-old found the fire extinguisher and thought it was whipped cream, put it in her mouth, and tried to eat it. The 14 year-old didn't even bother to call us. Luckily, the 12 year-old is fine, the stuff was safe. FML
Top comments
fsomelife 26
Go lighter on the kid, will you? She's the heroine of an FML! ...Sorry, too spoon?
ChakatBlackstar 29
What's worse? That she wanted to do drugs? Or that she sucked at doing drugs?
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Comments (127)
NodakN8V 25
Another child left behind
Mikain 7
Either i just had the biggest dejavu ever or this fml has already been posten twice before :S
TogeBara 12
You people have no clue what these parents are like. I've seen loving families that raised a respectable kid lose that same kid to drugs. Hell it happened to my cousin. o you arseholes need to back off and shut up. Sorry about your kid op. Keep track of anything like pills or any can of aerosol. Keep track of certain types of markers and you might even want to keep an eye out on alcohol. (people with drug issues can get alcohol issues too fairly easily i might add) Watch what kind of social gatherings she attends and make sure she doesn't do something stupid like this again.
Beepbeep7 14
Finally someone else who doesn't jump to blame the parent! I have seen many kids loved and respected by their parents only for them to turn around and do stupid shit. For people to immediately blame the parent is bullshit.
plantedrabbit3 16
I blame the child all the way, this is just stupidity at its finest
kalbrek009 20
Does she watch "breaking bad" by chance or just have some dumb friends...either way she needs to speak with a counselor before this gets out of hand for real...especially since she had the idea of trying to use albeit "fake" heroin to get high
BriCx 8
I am not sure which is worse, the fact that your daughter was trying to get into drugs or the fact that she's too much of a ditz to get it right. This is how you know you've failed as a parent...
silvanawernli 5
TALK TO HER ABOUT THIS INSTEAD OF POSTING THIS FOR EVERYONE TO READ.
MrMillz 6
tell her that she supposed to snort cinnamon
imbedderdenu 23
seriously? wow.
SasquatchDeluxe 10
Good thing she's so stupid.
MissSoul 6
the Betty Ford Clinic has discounted rates for people under the age of 18. I'm just sayin.