Today, I spent an hour explaining to a college student how you could have a baby and not be married. He still doesn't get it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tried to explain to my son that a 10.5lb baby can’t be born after only 6 months of pregnancy, and when he didn’t get that massive hint, I had to outright tell him his girlfriend must've already been 3 months pregnant when they met, and lied to him. I’ve raised an idiot. FML
Today, I found out my husband has been telling everyone he doesn't want a baby. He has been telling me he does. We have been trying for months. I'm now pregnant and confused. FML
Today, someone in class was making a point about premarital intercourse - "90% of teen virgins aren't saving it for marriage, they just can't get any." Another classmate pointed me out specifically. FML
Today, I had to explain to my husband that it's biologically impossible for cats and dogs to cross-breed, and that his "brilliant idea" of getting ours to mate is just plain disturbing. He still doesn't believe me. FML
Today, I explained to my boyfriend that I want to get my tubes tied, because I don’t want kids and can’t stand the fear of getting pregnant by accident, despite contraception, which has happened before. He summarized: “So, the main point is to preserve your fertility, right?” Wrong. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. Instead of being happy, he freaked out, then told me I was trying to "trap" him. We've been together for 12 years, and trying for 3. FML
Today, I told my parents I'm pregnant. I got a long lecture from my mom about using protection. It would have been fine hearing all that, but I'm turning 22, I moved out a few years ago, have a full time job with great benefits, and am getting married next summer. FML
Today, I'm 5 months pregnant. My 20-year-old boyfriend still refuses to tell his parents because he thinks he'll get in trouble. He thinks we can get away with "never telling them and just hiding the kid." FML
Today, I had to explain to my husband why I was assuming that he was planning to attend my graduation ceremonies for my PhD next week. He still doesn't understand why he has to be there, and is pissed that he will miss his weekly pub crawl with his friends. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't think he should marry me, because I have kids. They're his kids. FML
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Top comments
kinky44 28
Everyone knows genitals don't work until you get a marriage license and the state activates them.
PickledSweets 22
Oh, how I fear for the future of America.
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Comments (145)
Cookiee04 15
When I was little I used to think people only had babies when they got married
JazNim17 18
I did too....it really threw me for a loop when a girl in our community got pregnant at 16 (I was 5). I remember freaking out about it.
ZodiacalComa7 11
That's kinda nice... :)
sabine123_fml 5
She will get it when her tummy grows bigger
snippit 18
He needs to be sterilised! Poor bugger lol
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Red State sex ed strikes again.
ILookAtFMLs 13
Was he religious?
tuffykat 8
No he got it..its just not on his moral radar to do that - that is why he kept saying he didnt understand you. What you did not get that he was putting you down for allowing children outside of marriage, ydi! Guess only the college educated get his pov and humor!
Shade1982 21
Hi, and welcome to the 21st century...
bosox29 14
Were you the guy OP was talking to? If not than you have no idea what he was thinking but thanks for trying asshole!
babeababe 16
Are you sure he wasn't just messing with you? Haha!
Setareh23 34
Exactly! I have the feeling he was just being a total smart-ass.
ibanghellokitty 8
So this is how the economy goes down.
darkfireflame 15
Sex Ed in America ladies and gentlemen.