Today, I rode my bike to the grocery store. I left my bike on the small bike rack they have outside the door. When I came out 5 minutes later I found someone had tied their enormous, growling German Shepard to the same rack. I had to wait for the owner to come out who then laughed at me. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I saw a bike locked to a short bollard, making it very easy to steal. Being as nice as I am, I stayed, hoping the owner would come soon and no one else would take it. Then the guy who bullied me in highschool showed up, asked me what I was doing, laughed at me, took the bike, and left. FML
Today, I walked out of my college dorm to see that the intelligent person who locked their bike next to mine decided as an added security they would lock their bike to the rack, and to my bike. FML
Today, I rode my bike to the store because I only had a few things to pick up. When I walked back out after five minutes, my bike was stolen. I had gone to the store to buy a new bike lock. FML
Today, I went on a 50 km bike ride with a friend. We stopped for a break halfway through, and locked our bikes up. When we returned, some guy had locked his bike to mine. We had to wait an hour for him to return. FML
Today, I biked to the store to buy a new lock, since biking is my only form of transportation. I left my bike unattended for the last time, only to come back with a new chain, but no bike. FML
Today, whilst on a cycling holiday, in a somewhat hungover state, I accidentally chained my bike to the back of someone else's caravan. As I walked away, I heard a loud scraping noise. I turned around and watched my bike get dragged down a long gravel road and through a pile of horse shit. FML
Today, I was riding my bike, when I saw a large dog sitting in front of a house. I started to really crank the pedals, figuring that by the time it saw me, I'd be long gone. My chain popped off, I lost control and crashed onto the side of the road. The dog hadn't moved. It was a statue. FML
Today, I went out to where I'd parked my bike only to find that someone had stolen my bike seat. Not the bike, just the seat. I had to ride my bike two miles home in the rain like I was climbing a hill in the Tour de France, while other cyclists moved out of my way in confusion, all while trying to avoid me. FML
Today, I rode my newly-purchased bicycle to Lowe's to look at flooring and back splashes for our upcoming remodel. Upon leaving the store, I found out that my bicycle had been stolen by someone who had bought a hacksaw from that store while I was shopping. They left the receipt to mock me. FML
Today, someone had put a lock on my bike. While I was trying to saw it off, the police drove by. I was arrested for trying to steal a bike and released four hours later when they figured out that it was actually my bike. FML
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Top comments
HeyThereGorgeous 0
German Shepherds are beautiful and sweet if trained correctly. Clearly this one wasn't
Tehalon 0
You gotta admit that it's funny :P
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Comments (154)
UsingLogic 0
I meant "drive 15 minutes to reach a golf field" in my previous message. Not 1 minute. Screw the edit function, it's much too short. May have just as well not added it at all.
murfle 0
Yeah the owner is stupid. If you were a dick you could have walked just to the edge of the leash and gotten a small bite or even a scratch. Called the cops and demanded the dog be put down and then sued the owner.
MissyWissyKach 0
you should have gone up and let it smell you and pet a lil and get ur bike ur rly stupid for that FYL
piperian396 0
If it makes you feel better, that guy probably had a small dick. Why else would he feel the need to take a snarling dog to the grocery store?
Amorbis 0
The dude probably has self-esteem issues.. though is probably a good trainer if he is able to control this breed.
Skitl35 0
This is weak. Not FML-worthy.
Kitty34_fml 0
I hate when people tie their dogs outside grocery stores and malls. If you have to do errands - don't take your pet. It will get stolen. You should have bitched out the owner or called the SPCA.
DrCoxfan 0
That sucks if the dog is growling at you wait for the owner sense he laughed at you you should get your bike when he's not looking kick him on his junk and run as fast as you can
ishythedude 0
This isnt an FML I saw this in a Reno911 episode
donkeystyle 0
Veracity notwithstanding, I hate dogs. Dogs are evil.