Miscellaneous: Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint...

By FullOfNick - 10/09/2011 07:11 - United States

Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 629

You deserved it 35 775

Miscellaneous

Money, well, get back, I'm alright Jack…

Batman

Gonna need more details, please

By Anonymous - 06/05/2015 17:44 - United States - Riverside

Today, I got a text from a guy I hooked up with. I'm not really interested in him, so I rushed out of his house last night. He was letting me know I left my wallet at his house, and if I want it, I'll have to let him take me to dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 245

You deserved it 37 195

By Hardsleeper - 16/10/2009 09:23 - United States

Today, I learned that my car alarm only goes off if the car is unlocked a bit forcibly. Doesn't make a sound when some prick breaks the window out in the middle of the night to steal my cd player. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 891

You deserved it 2 295

By Miroslav208 - 20/10/2011 14:32 - United States

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why it would be highly offensive and inappropriate for him to go as Caylee Anthony for Halloween. I think he's still planning on doing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 069

You deserved it 4 858

Dirty rice

By Dirtyrice - 24/12/2019 20:00 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, my 8-year-old son decided to make some rice for lunch. When we had it, I noticed a horrid gritty taste. It turns out, he puts dirt in the rice to make "Dirty Rice". FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 663

You deserved it 381

By Anonymous - 30/06/2019 12:12

Today, my son got an email saying he could win an iPad if he just entered his credit card number. He asked for mine, telling me that it was so he could buy some school supplies online, so I gave it to him. The internet just conned a credit card number out of a 17-year-old nitwit. And me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 631

You deserved it 959

By CloroxDoggo - 24/11/2016 00:23 - United States

Today, I was meeting up with a friend in a town. He said he was at the restaurant we were going to meet at; I was too. Turns out I was in the wrong town. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 326

You deserved it 2 002

By cheesylad - 10/06/2017 06:00 - Australia - Sunnybank

Today, I was alone in the car with my crush. For reasons I will never understand, I put on the song 'Kiss a Girl' by Keith Urban. I could feel her cringing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 102

You deserved it 1 328

Thanks, I guess…

By leogs23 - 03/06/2021 06:01

Today, I was taking a shower with my girlfriend when she 'complimented' me by saying, "You’re cute, like a rat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 742

You deserved it 116

By jnr1234 - 20/06/2012 02:15 - United States - Princeton

Today, I was sent a letter by the vet, saying my cat was late for her yearly checkup. My cat died last week and I'd had her cremated by the same people who had sent the letter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 531

You deserved it 2 458

By tittyboomboom - 24/03/2016 13:16 - Australia

Today, I was taking the train home from another unsuccessful job interview. As I was sitting there, I felt the urge to yawn, but before I could raise my hand to cover my mouth some guy stuck his finger in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 873

You deserved it 2 032

By Anonymous - 25/02/2013 19:26 - United States - Grandville

Today, I heard from my dad for the first time in over six months. It was through Facebook, in a message blaming my brothers and me for his horrible life, and in which he spelled my name wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 417

You deserved it 2 489

By anonymous1 - 14/06/2009 00:43 - United States

Today, my sister and I got fitted for bridesmaid's dresses. It was pretty sheer material, so I took off my bright pink thong and left it on the changing room hanger. As I was looking at myself in the mirror, a woman came out of the room holding my thong. She had tried it on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 587

You deserved it 10 956

By Anonymous - 25/02/2013 16:14 - United States

Today, my mom tried to convince my dad that I was a lesbian. Why? Because she was bored. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 613

You deserved it 3 871

By Mr.P - 21/10/2011 15:35 - United States

Today, I was just about to sit down to watch my favorite TV show when my dog jumped over the back of my couch, landed on my head and tried to jump through the window. I now have concussion and a window to replace, all because of a bird. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 169

You deserved it 3 239

By mu5icadd1ct - 08/07/2016 13:22

Today, my sister stole my bike and gave it to her boyfriend. When I told my parents, they said it was fine, because I wasn't using it anyway. The reason I wasn't using it was because it needed a new tire, and I was saving up for one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 560

You deserved it 886

By Noname - 13/03/2009 20:03 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were choosing animals that reminded us of eachother. I said he reminded me of a tiger because he is really muscular. He told me I reminded him of a zebra. When I asked him why, he said it was because of my stretchmarks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 989

You deserved it 7 905

By Anonymous - 18/02/2016 00:53 - United States - Taunton

Today, I worked such a long shift at Panera that when my boyfriend called later, I answered, "It's a fresh day at Panera Bread in [town], this is [name] speaking. How may I help you?" He thought it was hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 901

You deserved it 2 344

By duh - 27/01/2009 08:10 - United States

Today, I sang the itsy bitsy spider song with a class of thirty 20 somethings because we're going to be kindergarten teachers. She made us do the hand motions too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 266

You deserved it 26 774

By Anonymous - 02/01/2013 19:02 - Canada - Belle River

Today, at a house party, I finally got the guy I've been seeing alone in his room. We started making out, and I got on top of him to take control. He responded by saying he couldn't do it because he needed to go make pizza for his friends, and then bolted out of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 857

You deserved it 9 829

By windthroughmyflab - 13/05/2015 23:19 - United States

Today, I stuck my hand out the car window and noticed my arm fat flapping in the wind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 672

You deserved it 10 424

By YAABOIII - 05/04/2009 22:04 - United States

Today, the 7 year old boy I was babysitting studied my upper lip and said "It's okay, my daddy won't let me shave yet either." I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 123

You deserved it 8 782

By maebyf - 31/08/2010 14:48 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend of three years proposed to me. He brought me to our favorite restaurant and ordered expensive champagne. It was all very romantic, until he got on one knee and I farted out of surprise. Loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 906

You deserved it 8 346

Unknown number

By Whoisshe - 17/01/2020 01:00

Today, I gave my phone number to a guy at the movie theatre. I was excited to receive a text a few minutes later, sure enough when I unlocked my phone I had received a message from an unknown number. It was his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 928

You deserved it 389

By Anonymous - 03/01/2011 01:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I realised it takes me longer to take a dump than it does to have sex with my boyfriend. I also realised taking a dump is more satisfying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 686

You deserved it 6 541

By -- - 04/09/2011 16:42 - Canada

Today, at my dental practice, we received a shipment of the stupid flavoured gloves my boss ordered to make the place more "friendly to the kids". I started working in an adult patient's mouth, when he decided to start creepily making out with my fingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 544

You deserved it 3 046

By Anonymous - 28/05/2016 23:05 - Netherlands

Today, my brother "borrowed" my car and keys without asking me. He came back 4 hours later, alone and pale faced. It took half an hour of questions, interrogation, and finally threats before he admitted that my car is sitting in a ditch a few miles away, probably totaled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 210

You deserved it 871

Who's that weird guy?

By Anonymous - 27/12/2020 10:59

Today, I was trying to get a girl's attention, because I had a question. I shouted her name. No answer. I shouted again but louder. It wasn't her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 275

You deserved it 667

By ._. - 05/06/2013 00:08 - United Kingdom - Letchworth

Today, my wife uttered the soul-crushing words, "But we're married now, why would we have sex?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 629

You deserved it 8 829

By 1415926 - 22/01/2015 05:22 - United States

Today, I got a large envelope from a college I applied to earlier. My mom, expecting big news, made my family gather round as I opened it. It ended up being a letter of rejection from not just that school, but all 3 campuses of the state college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 186

You deserved it 2 746

By Bigfoot - 02/09/2017 01:30

Today, I participated in an obstacle course. As I was going over a set of monkey bars, my balls got crushed between the bar and my gut. I barely managed to get down before blacking out in the middle of the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 932

You deserved it 369

By Nola - 13/09/2018 22:00

Today, my fiancé got his associate degree in the mail. Wanting to surprise him when he got home, I opened it to display it before going out to buy groceries. His dog got a hold of his degree and shredded it to pieces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 249

You deserved it 1 732

By Anonymous - 07/09/2013 11:26 - United States - North Easton

Today, my sister-in-law pooped with the bathroom door open until my husband had to tell her to close it, then she came out with unwashed hands and started rooting through the cookies. This isn't even the most unhygienic thing she's done today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 736

You deserved it 3 575

By bad dad - 05/06/2019 06:00

Today, trying to be a good co-parent, I asked my ex if he’d like to go to the circus with our kids and I. His new girlfriend of a whopping five days said it made her uncomfortable. He stood us up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 093

You deserved it 172

By good job bf - 11/01/2013 04:06 - United States - Southampton

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me at my grandma's funeral. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 104

You deserved it 2 872

Best words

By "Kilamo" - 25/01/2020 14:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years got down on one knee and asked those words all girls love to hear "would you do me the honor of performing fellatio on me"? with a Lifesavers gummy ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 897

You deserved it 377

End of the road

By Anonymous - 02/04/2021 21:30

Today, I landed my dream job with an international company. I figured I could work this until retirement, only to find out they hired me to shut down operations in my market. FML

I agree, your life sucks 874

You deserved it 60

By Msmerfner - 03/08/2013 08:40 - United States - Hemet

Today, I was trying to be sexy in the bathtub for my boyfriend. I leaned back and caught my hair on fire with the candle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 403

You deserved it 16 061

By Anonymous - 26/07/2013 03:15 - United States - Kannapolis

Today, I was in a training about the newest changes in CPR. The trainer was discussing chest compression techniques and said she prefers "good, fast, hard pumping." I was the only one who snickered out loud, drawing several annoyed looks from the other trainees. I'm a 45-year-old doctor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 744

You deserved it 20 460

By Anonymous - 06/07/2013 07:11 - United States - San Marcos

Today, I had a dream about marrying Hitler. I've had this same dream three times now. My subconscious is starting to scare me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 861

You deserved it 5 220

By Ignored - 13/07/2011 06:47 - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend can name each and every Pokémon, but can't remember my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 264

You deserved it 9 347

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FMLRelapse 4

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:56

They do look similar......

CoughDrops 5

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:56

How . . . do you NOT see that?

FMLRelapse 4

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:56

They do look similar......

cwissi 5

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:58

How did you find the picture :|

hannahcorrine 0

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:58

Hahaha I'd like to see your teachers face when they see that.

musicfreak9821 6

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Saturday 10 September 2011 17:08

Yeah, so similiar!

abbyelizabeth 9

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Saturday 10 September 2011 17:17

That would be a power point I would like to see.

enonymous 8

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Saturday 10 September 2011 17:52

Knowing Kiwi sheep herders close enough.

indielove 13

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Saturday 10 September 2011 18:20

So did your teacher like the presentation? Don't leave us hanging!

isaidexcuseme 0

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Saturday 10 September 2011 18:38

did he give you bonus marks;)

Keyman1212 14

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Saturday 10 September 2011 19:36

I'm sorry, but did you make the PowerPoint on a phone from the 1990's??

zukinihudini 0

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Saturday 10 September 2011 21:04

Were they in New Zealand?

zachherbert 10

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Saturday 10 September 2011 21:11

This happened to me! Except I got a picture of thousands of sheep when looking for naked men.... Go figure

Aysian 0

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Saturday 10 September 2011 22:04

Maybe if your gay

shybear15 0

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Saturday 10 September 2011 22:18

I've seen that picture... I didn't notice until my friend told me:)

NotAPedo 0

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Sunday 11 September 2011 0:35

If I was the teacher I would give him an A++

tjv3 10

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Sunday 11 September 2011 1:20

hahaha hahaha that made lol .... do they really look that similar??

MrShizzBear 0

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Sunday 11 September 2011 5:12

Sound really Baaaaahhd... but seriously I'm not the only one who went to look up the picture now am I?

R34luver 5

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Sunday 11 September 2011 6:51

131- i went to look it up too, god i need a social life -__-

CoughDrops 5

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:56

How . . . do you NOT see that?

ZebulonPike 8

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Saturday 10 September 2011 17:01

The picture is one often used as an optical illusion, it always looks like sheep in a field at first because the men are crouching.

Enslaved 36

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Saturday 10 September 2011 17:24

Ruebenspot: Thousands of Naked People Yeah, they look like sheep at first but if you look a tad bit closer, you can easily see that they're nude people. Hope your teacher grades on a curve!(:

ArcadePie 10

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Saturday 10 September 2011 19:11

I put the illusion as my profile picture if anyone wants to see it

poppylamonzo 0

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Saturday 10 September 2011 19:51

Omg that picture..

KiddNYC1O 20

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Saturday 10 September 2011 22:33

Op was mesmerized by the optical illusion their spincters created...

KiddNYC1O 20

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Saturday 10 September 2011 22:35

sphincters*

Enslaved 36

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Saturday 10 September 2011 23:24

"Sphincter says what?" Name that quote(: Party Time....excellent.

KiddNYC1O 20

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Saturday 10 September 2011 23:32

Well, you just said "what", sphincter.

zelricthestrong 4

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Sunday 11 September 2011 5:07

Hey man, we don't judge here...

Eval_fml 9

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:57

Oh, that picture! Took me a few minutes to realize that aswell. Reallt funneh though :D

marmlr339 14

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Sunday 11 September 2011 0:02

Send me a link to the picture.

sxe_beast 11

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Sunday 11 September 2011 0:10

Google "Sheeple"

ArcadePie 10

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Sunday 11 September 2011 1:48

Look at my profile picture

charlie43 1

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:57

Whats the purpose of that picture anyway?

indielove 13

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Saturday 10 September 2011 18:23

It's supposed to be an illusion. At first you think it's sheep, then soon you start seeing the naked men.

ThreeSheetsGone 12

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:57

Hey, that sheep has a boner! Wait...

mrlopez 13

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Saturday 10 September 2011 17:41

Are you sure? I think it's the next one to it :)

lakaiskate 12

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Saturday 10 September 2011 17:42

Why would any of those men have boners? Unless they were all secretly gay

Enslaved 36

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Saturday 10 September 2011 18:38

Did you check out the boner on the black sheep?

sandyandellie 5

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Sunday 11 September 2011 6:01

I did not need that visual...

Jdeluxh 12

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Sunday 11 September 2011 6:47

Or openly gay.

Checker 20

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:58

I know that picture...

X3liteXHunterX 12

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Saturday 10 September 2011 18:19

Lol at your picture

marthagayo 14

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Saturday 10 September 2011 18:29

Omg! I love ur pic

AaronTkr 0

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Saturday 10 September 2011 18:32

this dudes pic Is epic

thatguy326 0

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Saturday 10 September 2011 18:50

Amazing pic

Checker 20

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Saturday 10 September 2011 20:40

I see I have some fans...

Jdeluxh 12

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Sunday 11 September 2011 6:49

I don't think it's that funny...

CryMoreFMLs 14

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Sunday 11 September 2011 11:09

2 comments and you have 34 total thimbs up(from when I comment). Congrats. Yes I DID stalk you too :)

Checker 20

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Sunday 11 September 2011 15:49

I am honored that I am worth stalking

yougotapes 7

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:58

Lol that must be embarrassing lol Or cool Depends on how your peers see it

Kyzahhh 7

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Saturday 10 September 2011 18:39

Well I'm thinking they will see it as sheep then on closer inspection see a whole bunch of naked men

yougotapes 7

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Sunday 11 September 2011 6:19

I only say cool cause I think a person who did is pretty neat in my book... My opinion

Checker 20

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Sunday 11 September 2011 15:52

Is your name 'You-go-tapes' or 'You-got-apes'?

cherrypie22 6

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:58

I bet that turned some people on ;)

DEADTR00PER 0

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:59

Someone played you haha.

AGswag 8

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Saturday 10 September 2011 16:59

What a whore

evanedwards85 6

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Saturday 10 September 2011 18:16

what?

Aysian 0

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Saturday 10 September 2011 22:06

This guy^

Nearly

Today, I feel like I'm going crazy as I'm in a 2-year relationship with a guy who's 17 years older than me (I'm 23). He's a wonderful partner and I'm totally in love, but the age gap causes monthly, sometimes daily, shifts between wanting to have it all with him, and wanting to leave him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

Today, it has been 7 years of me submitting FML’s. I don’t know what worse, that I’ve submitted so many of that none have never been featured. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33

You deserved it 17

Spicy

Today, I found out my husband has to take Viagra to get it up with me. He never needed it with his ex-wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 257

You deserved it 66

Today, my boyfriend has spent all morning claiming there’s nothing to do when it’s raining outside. Sex is always an option, but he’s missed all my hints, including stripping naked and kissing him, because he thought I was on my way to get a shower instead of trying to fuck him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 696

You deserved it 214

Dirty rice

Thanks, I guess…

Unknown number

Who's that weird guy?

Best words

End of the road

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