Tim
United States
Today, I realized that as a U.S. Marine in the infantry, I'm more afraid to talk to girls than I am of getting shot at. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Big_gulps_huh
This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff
Minneapolis, United States
Shy guy
Today, I realized I am more confident running a million-dollar piece of construction equipment than I am around people of the opposite sex. FML
Female
Montebello, United States
Today, I was excited to finally get an interview after being unemployed since getting out of the military nearly a year ago. Turns out, they weren't even interested in hiring me. They'd just never met a female Marine before. FML
carboat
United States
Today, I woke up and I'm still in the Marine Corps. FML
Anonymous
Davis, United States
Today, I realized that I will be leaving for the US Marine Corps in June, and the presidential election is in November. I could potentially be serving with Trump as my Commander-in-Chief. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I realized the closest thing I have to guys hitting on me are the ones who ask to be my friend on Call of Duty because I have the word "girl" in my name. FML
Anonymous
Frying pan, meet fire
Today, I got back from an 8 month deployment but rather than being pleased to see me my wife wanted to continue the same argument we were having the day I left. I miss being shot at. FML
Fitz
United States
Benefits
Today, I overheard my mother and sister talking so I stopped to eavesdrop. I recently enlisted in the Marines, and they were talking about what they would do with the money if I died. FML
S3R1AL K1LL3R X
United States
Smooth brainrot
Today, in my college class, our teacher asked us what we wanted to do when we get out of college. I guess being a U.S. Marine gets you a lecture for the whole class to hear that I'm a war hungry pig, and should get a real job that requires a brain. My job field is Aircraft repair. FML
saywhat
United States
Today, I met the girl who dumped me because the distance between us was too great. We're in the same city again. She's now dating a Marine in Iraq. FML
Jaxter
United States
Catch!
Today, I was walking up to girlfriend's house when her terrifying Marine Corps dad threw a football at me. Not being very athletic, I surprised myself by catching it. He gestured for me throw it back and I watched it spiral wildy to the left and hit my girlfriend's mom in the face. FML
Top comments
dc4 12
Awww, that's cute :P
FreakinChaps 0
Girls aren't THAT scary...
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Comments (424)
YerMomsBalls 3
true #8. and if she turns you down, shoot her. that way you can make guns your ally, and women the enemy! wuahahaha!!
batgirrrl84 0
two one seven seven four one three six zero nine :)
tonyroan1 0
just tell them your a Marine and they will flock to you
reddawn85 8
It's a bad idea to use the fact that you're a Marine to pull chicks. Example: Take a girl who loves a man in uniform and put her in a place like Camp Pendleton where there is nothing but men in uniform. Most of which may be more experienced and/or better looking.
liekxombies 0
shut the **** up you stupid boot.
Swishmantastic87 0
If the marines wanted you to have a girl they would have issued you one semper fi
motocross74 2
dont be a bitch... 0331
corruptblackkat 17
just run into a girl at the bar and then tell her what you just told us.... guaranteed awesomness
maddie2015 0
Actually, girls find guys being shy like that really cute!(:
EmoVampire13 3
dont worry man, im just as bad with it. as for the gun thing, just think of the war as a really, REALLY competitive game of search and destroy on Call of Duty.