Today, I noticed that the walls of my apartment are ridiculously thin, when I heard my neighbor slowly walk up the stairs, slam the bathroom door, lift the toilet cover, take a pee and end with a nice "AAHH." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the walls in my house are so thin that I heard my roommate yell from the bathroom upstairs, "Hear my butthole roar." Now I’m scared to use the bathroom after him. FML
Today, sick of the unfiltered noise we hear from our neighbours in our upstairs apartment, as we're above their fence line, we signed the lease on an apartment downstairs. While I was downstairs, my partner clomped upstairs, opened the bathroom door, and took a piss. I heard EVERYTHING. FML
Today, the landlord of our building constructed a bathroom in the space under the stairs, outside my office, on the other side of a thin wall. He must have some kind of bowel disorder, because now I get to hear the sounds of his loud, wet and gassy pooping several times per day. FML
Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML
Today, I got home with stomach pain and immediately did a 10 second long farting, splattering, spluttering shit into the toilet. Now I know the walls are thin in my flat, but I wasn’t expecting the hot guy next door to say to me through the wall, “Jesus, are you alright in there?” FML
Today, I was woken at 4 a.m. by the sounds of someone crashing down the stairs. I scrambled out, still half-asleep, to find out that nobody was in an agonized heap at the bottom. The walls are so thin in my house that I could hear the neighbour falling down HIS stairs. FML
Today, I now know why my next-door neighbour can't look me in the eye without smirking. He can hear every grunt, groan, fart and strain that happens in my bathroom from his bathroom. FML
Today, I had to shit really bad while I was in bed with my girlfriend. Luckily she was sleeping. I didn’t want to be obvious, so I closed all the doors, crept into the bathroom and sat on the toilet. I accidentally let out the loudest fart. I got a text saying, “Walls are thin, you good?” FML
Today, at work, I had to use the bathroom to urinate. It's basically in an open plan office, so everyone can hear absolutely everything. After successfully and discreetly doing my business, I noticed a bit of dirt on the wall. I gave it a rub with my thumb on the smooth tile. It sounded exactly like a loud fart. FML
Today, I finally determined the source of the horrible smell that periodically invades my apartment: there's nothing wrong with the plumbing as I previously thought, I can just smell my neighbors pooping in their bathroom on the other side of the wall. FML
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Top comments
mandiepandie204 0
Move somewhere else, SOON.
takeapieandrun 9
Lol, have fun!
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Comments (157)
like_its_ya_bday 0
haha hope he doesn't get any bc then would be the biggest fml
nerdsgetmehot 23
Hearing someone pee isn't the most disgusting thing to overhear from a random person. Get back to us when you hear him masturbating.
potterwatch 0
this is awesome
jammywanks 0
one of the most underrated feelings in the world
skyeyez9 25
At least you didn't hear bubbly, squirty diarreah sounds and: "Wow, I don't remember eating that or Hey Shirley, come look at this before I flush it! And Oh no, the toilet is overflowing, its gonna seep thru the walls and in my neighbor's apt."
sataris20 5
not fml worthy. post better stories
kidwiththehair12 0
while he's taking a piss you should start slamming the walls and yelling "RON, STOP IT"
Hannerzzz 0
....Who said he was in the bathroom...? ;o haha
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
I know what you mean, sourgirl. I find few sensations as physically satisfying as the ol' Q-Tip eargasm. Then there are those acupuncture appointment days, when I'm in a lot of pain beforehand. Then about halfway through the session, the pain suddenly breaks and... Aah. I think I should stop myself here. :}
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
I'm guessing you're new to the building. I learned of my neighbors' preference for bathroom fights within the first week. Still, that's better than my last place, which was quite soundproof but not smellproof. They were nasty cooks with a nasty cat. Yuck.