Today, I had to take my 15-year-old son to the hospital. He'd gone out dressed as some My Little Pony character and encountered someone who'd had the same idea. They then got into a fistfight, and my son got the shit beaten out of him. I wish I'd never bred. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML
Today, our daughter was going to a cosplay event, until her dad saw the costume, or lack thereof, that she was planning to wear in public, with people taking photographs of her. He got so mad, he actually burst a blood vessel in his neck and had to go to hospital. She still went to the event. FML
Today, a punk-looking college kid was making fun of my mentally handicapped son. Out of anger, I punched him in the face. I got handcuffed and thrown into a police car. The kid stood there laughing and pointing at me. FML
Today, my son visited for the first time in three years, asking to stay a while. It turns out he insulted someone online and gave his address in case they wanted to fight him. They accepted the offer, and so my son's imaginary Muay Thai skills went AWOL, along with his testicles. FML
Today, my ex had the bright idea of trying to bond with our son by taking him to a UFC fight. Our son is only 8 and autistic. It’s been hours and he hasn’t stopped crying about the "big scary men that kept hurting each other." FML
Today, my 15-year-old son got so enraged at a fly that kept harassing him, that he ended up slapping himself in the face as it flew by him. This caused him to fall out of his chair, at which point he broke down into a mess of tears, humiliating me in front of everyone. FML
Today, some muscle-head showed up at my house and started beating on me. Turned out my son had been posing online as a Navy SEAL, using a picture of me, and had dared this guy to come over and fight him. FML
Today, my son, who to my great shame is a typical bully, was suspended for bullying a disabled girl. Her father must have been the biggest, meanest, most tattooed ex-marine I've ever seen. He blamed me for bad parenting, and I actually peed myself a little in fear, which he saw too. FML
Today, my son broke his hand when he and his best friend had the genius idea of punching each other in the fists as hard as they could. FML
Today, I grounded my son after finding out that he's been bullying other kids at school. He got mad and screamed at me, calling me a "bastard". Instead of defending me, my wife got pissed and accused me of having taught our son to swear like that. I can never win. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Nyx_fml 23
I bet he was Honeysuckle. That one seems like a tough pony.
CommunistBanana 8
Friendship is not always magic :(
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (220)
underthesea12 24
your son was a brony lol
Crono_brony 2
wow. adding lol at the end of that just pisses me off. you think it's just a joke to be different. to be unique.... I bet you have a secret guilty pleasure that you COULD display, but you're too insecure about it, and just won't say anything just to seem 'cool'.
AKAR2521 4
why is a 15 year old boy dressed as a my little pony character? why would any 15 year old do that boy or girl?? grow up people, halloween is for children, i think its okay to dress up when youre and older kid or a parent but dont go trick or teating and expect candy for yourself
MzZombicidal 36
How is that in any other situation a 15-year-old is considered a child but now they're suddenly too old to Trick or Treat? Let kids be kids, man.
Mifflicious 18
We don't do trick or treating here, but something similar on easter ( except there's no trick, we're just there for the treat! ) and last time I wen't knocking on people's doors was when I was 15. Sure people though I was too old but hey, free candy! I'd still go if I had someone to go with :')
flea_of_death 23
I'm 18 and I went trick or treating with my 17 year old boyfriend last night =) to quote my little pony..."you're never too old for free candy!"
cblock94 7
I'm 19 and my brother is 20 and last Halloween we both dressed up for Halloween as My Little Pony characters. How is it wrong to dress up as character in a show that you love?
AKAR2521 4
you peoe are entitled to yoir opinions but i'm not? MLP is a cbildrens sbow, excuse,me if i think,its weird that TEENAGERS are dressed up like characters from a childrens show, thats a bit creepy, that wasnt my poimt though. i beleive its extremely immature for anyone,over the age of 13 to go trick or treating and EXPECT candy if they go without a child. grow up. lots of people feel tbat way, its not just me
SecsNoises 6
Too old for free candy? NEVER!
flea_of_death 23
154 - I might listen to your opinion if you could type properly =)
AKAR2521 4
like you've never made a type-o?? i was possed off writing that beacuse all the ignorant people. stfu
pazuzus_intern 10
177 you are royally ****** in the head if you think that monstrosity was "just a typo". Also you need to realize that nobody gives a shit about what you think we should be doing on Halloween or our spare time.
AKAR2521 4
lol what makes you think u give a shit about what you think? and excusw you but no i'm not '****** in the head' douchebag, **** off please, thanks, bye :) was my typing better for you that time? :)
AKAR2521 4
I'm pretty sure if i was in agreement with the other comments, you people wouldn't be commenting on my spelling. it happens, no need to get so bent out of shape about it.
pazuzus_intern 10
Evidently you do care what we think because if you didn't you wouldn't bother replying. Please learn the meaning of "immaturity" before commenting on other peoples choices whilst calling strangers "douchebags" and spelling like a first grader and maybe you wouldn't receive rude comments. By the way, your typing has not gotten better.
AKAR2521 4
i dont care what strangers think, i'm just defending myself to you douchebag :) now why dont you shut the **** up WHILST you go **** yourself :)
askingandy 23
Mother of the ******* year award goes to you. How's your son's self-esteem doing? Whether it's over his costume, his love of My Little Pony, or because he got in a fight, you're just absolutely terrible. No mother should ever say that shit. If you don't want him dressed as the MLP character, say something. And for anyone questioning the boy's love of My Little Pony, grow up. My boyfriend and a lot of my male friends are bronies. None of them are the creepy outcasts you're picturing.
Raum 19
67 - 15-year-olds do stupid things. Especially boys, since society kind of puts pressure on them to be tough, which is possibly why teenage boys get into fistfights in the first place. Getting in a fight doesn't excuse the fact that the mother apparently has so little love for her child that this incident makes her wish he'd never been born.
howdoilogin 9
That feeling must be terrible to learn you bred a brony....and the fact that they got into a fistfight over that show only shows who the target audience is. It's okay, just get him some psychological help and a hooker or two and he'll have a 70% recovery rate, odds I would bet on.
Crono_brony 2
are you serious? what have bronies ever done to you? You don't know why we do what we do. You have no excuse to think that we are bad people. Despite this whole scrap with this kid, I bet he's overall a nice person. And why would he need help? Are you trying to deprive someone of something that makes him happy? How about I took whatever you liked and snapped it two, huh? Think before you type, I know I have.
pazuzus_intern 10
You're an idiot
Jelbeztok 17
you shouldve told him to dress as Snowflake. i dont think anyone would bother him then.
lazy_girl 12
YYEEAAAAHHHHHH!!!!
flashback_fml 14
I'm assuming his father committed suicide a while ago
TheJMB 15
YDI and more for saying such an awful thing.
johnpaisley 6
I wish I could vote you deserve it 1000 more times u basically said I wish he was never was born with the quote"i wish I never bred" I don't get the pony thing but u deserve it for saying such a cruel thing and posting it on line thinking u will get sympathy
Eivana 37
Yeah. You should have never bred.
awesomeamandas 37
And you never should have been bred.
ViviMage 40
Yet another reason I can't stand ponies/Bronies.