Love: Today, I had my first real meeting with my girlfriend's parents....

By Brian - 04/05/2009 23:27 - United States

Today, I had my first real meeting with my girlfriend's parents. We had dinner at a pretty upscale restaurant and everything was going great. When the check came, I offered to pay and I stood up to take out my wallet. When I opened it, 3 condoms fell out on the table in front of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 542

You deserved it 64 557

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Same thing different taste

By Otherguy - 18/11/2008 07:36 - France

Today, I was at a restaurant with a girl I like, and as I was getting my wallet out, I dropped a condom. She didn't see anything, and I didn't dare pick it up in case I drew attention to the "object". The waiter walked past, picked up, and held it out to me with a huge grin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 972

You deserved it 9 411

By Anonymous - 01/05/2011 05:50 - United States

Today, I wanted to take my girlfriend to a nice dinner before prom. Her parents followed her in, and joined us to "keep an eye on me." They interrupted all our conversations, ate an expensive meal, then got up and walked out when the waitress brought the $95 check, leaving me to pay for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 710

You deserved it 4 468

By Anonymous - 24/06/2013 20:26 - United States - Houston

Today, I took my girlfriend of nearly 2 years out to dinner so I could propose. When the waiter brought the check, I caused a bit of a scene to get everyone's attention. When I got on my knee and proposed, she said no and asked if I could hurry up and pay, because she was embarrassed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 734

You deserved it 18 290

By mark - 05/03/2012 22:55 - United Kingdom

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a nice restaurant for our anniversary. Mid-way through the meal, a guy at the table across left for the restroom. My girlfriend reached over and swiped the guy's wallet from the table. My gonads went AWOL, and I couldn't even bring myself to call her out on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 214

You deserved it 29 145

First impressions

By medik - 23/02/2010 12:51 - United States

Today, I went over to my girlfriend's parents house for dinner. This was the first time I was meeting them, so I bought a $70 bottle of red wine to try and impress them. I tried to be smooth while popping the cork. I did, but the bottle slipped and red wine poured onto their white carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 963

You deserved it 8 207

Not now, guys

By Sonofa - 17/05/2013 15:52 - Canada - Cold Lake

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 232

You deserved it 3 802

Good one

By bf. - 19/12/2013 02:59 - Canada - London

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Dinner was going well until her dad secretly fed the asparagus to the dog under the table, and then "discovered" what a childish thing I had done. My girlfriend believed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 211

You deserved it 3 000

By waterspike - 29/01/2010 13:18 - France

Today, after finally getting a date with the girl I like, she invited her new boyfriend along as well. I ended up paying for their first date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 788

You deserved it 9 965

By BrokeAsAJoke - 29/03/2009 13:38 - United States

Today, I got a chance to have dinner and a movie with a girl I've liked for a while. I ran late, so in a hurry to make the movie, and trying to be smooth for her, I told the waiter I'd "take care of him" if he made it fast. He did. When he brought the check, I realized I had forgotten my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 298

You deserved it 64 268

By totallyembarassed - 07/07/2012 04:08 - United States - Charlotte

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 993

You deserved it 28 756

24788 6

Tuesday 5 May 2009 9:07

Who put those condoms in my wallet?

imintheair 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 9:13

ydi, for not listening to your high school sex ed teacher when they told you that keeping condoms in your wallet can cause them to be exposed to higher temperatures and/or weird conditions that affect their effectiveness.

Comments

haha_fail88 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 2:27

what kind of grown man still puts condoms in his wallet?

Nakedsquirrel 5

Wednesday 6 May 2009 2:28

Wallets are a bad place to keep condoms; your body heat isn't good for them. I used to do that till I was cautioned.

cinderelly 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 3:15

didn't you pay attention in health class? if you keep condoms in your wallet they will get warm and expand which will make them easier to break. have her keep them in her purse.

7_______7_______ 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 4:06

What the **** do you need three for? Everyone knows wallet condoms are just for emergencies. So, like, two should totally cover it

nightngale 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 4:08

Why would you be carrying around 3 condoms in your wallet if you're in a relationship? I thought only single guys who never knew when they're having sex next would carry them around.

k_ristenn 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 4:29

didn't know know it's bad to put condoms in your wallet? they're more likely to break because of the friction of constantly opening and closing it. trust me.

happycat_fml 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 6:46

Don't keep condoms in your wallet, moron. You can mess them up that way.

applesaucers 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 6:41

Well, at least we all know you're trying to be responsible. . . and a little uneducated on the 'condom in wallet = unwanted children' thing.

pennygoo 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 7:25

hey at least you're having safe sex, eh? i would be fine with my daughter's boyfriend having condoms... but just keep them somewhere other than your wallet, next time.