By emydoll - 28/04/2014 03:28 - United States - Honolulu
emydoll tells us more.
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Can't blame you. No way you could have predicted that. But maybe you should check your phone less and look around you more.
I don't know about you, but personally, and I know a lot of people are the same, the last thing I want to be doing while sitting in a public place alone is to be looking around, I want to avoid awkward eye contact whenever I can.. I would much rather look down at my phone even if I was staring at nothing. OP should have definitely kept the comment inside their head rather than let it out loud..
Two reasons, 30: they may look normal on the surface but be secretly crazy, and I also know that I, personally, do not want to hear some stranger's life story whether they're crazy or not. Some people are chatty and love human interaction, and others prefer to keep contact to a minimum. For those of us in the later category, smartphones are a godsend!
I was in a waiting room once and a guy said "good text?" to me. I was actually doing work, but I laughed and put my phone away. We then chatted for half an hour. It was just us in there. Not everyone finds it hard to strike a conversation with a stranger, especially if it's small talk. You don't have to say "why are you here?"
7, that's what can cause an addiction to phones. Everywhere I am, I talk to people. I even scared an old lady because i said hi, she didn't know me so it scared her. No idea how, but that's how some people are. Just talk to people, you make a lot of new friends. Don't talk to anyone, you could be missing a chance of a really good friend or even partner.
Some people have a social anxiety. They're already having trouble dealing with being in a public place and the last thing they want is to be speaking to someone they don't know, other people just don't like to have conversations with random people. Yes for some it is nice to have a small chat while waiting but for others it is a big no no and there's nothing wrong with that. Some people simply just don't want to associate with strangers.
137, if the talkee is clearly reading or otherwise preoccupied, that should be a clear sign that they're not interested in idle conversation and have every right to be mad, or even just irritated, that you interrupted them. It's fine to approach a stranger, as long as that stranger is giving cues that they're willing to be approached. The people on this thread who are all for whipping out a smartphone to specifically avoid potentially stress-raising interactions with people they don't know would not be that amenable.
there seem to be 2 schools of thoughts here, one being its ok to start a conversation with strangers and the other who think strangers talking to you is annoying. If you belong to the group who think its ok to strike a conversation with strangers, you're the annoying one while the remaining group is just being polite. The problem with OP isn't that he should look around more or not, but he shouldn't talk out loud to himself in public places, not only does it cause awkward situations but its also disturbing to others near by. If by chance thats what he's seeing a doctor about then, my bad!
I agree with #167 ... I have social anxiety, strangers coming up to me and talking to me makes me feel very anxious and near panic. I can socialize with friends just fine, but public situations greatly upset me. I hardly touch my phone when I'm with people, but waiting rooms and the like turn into zoning out into phone games or just reorganizing my apps!
52 - But what I'm saying is that the antisocial behavior wasn't the norm 20 years ago. I enjoy meeting new people. I've made tons of friends I would have never met if we didn't strike up conversation. On top of that, I've received quite a few job offers because you never know who you are talking to. It might be a future boss, friend, or girlfriend.
That's great that you enjoy meeting new people under random circumstances, 197, but I don't, nor, I suspect, do most of the people on this thread. It's one thing to be antisocial in a situation that's specifically intended for networking and making new connections--a conference, a dinner, a dating event. But I know that when I'm waiting in a doctor's office, I'm doing so in order to see the doctor, not the Chatty Cathy sitting next to me. Maybe I am missing out on new friends and job opportunities because I happen to find chit-chat mentally draining, but I'm already happy with the friends and the job I have. Also, the introvert vs. extrovert demarcation isn't new. Before smartphones, quiet types simply read a magazine or pulled out a book to avoid public discomfort. Smartphones are just another, more portable tool now available for an arsenal that's been needed for a long time.
#34 I can think of a few reasons someone wouldn't want to accept a friend request from someone they "knew" In high school for example: one they may have not been nice to them at school and are just trying to be noisy, two they could've just been "friends" at school and didn't socialize with each other outside of school so why do it now, three their friendship could've of ended badly and maybe the girl forgot depending on how long it's been since OP'S graduation, four maybe she had a crush on OP and OP didn't feel the same way about her, and five maybe they didn't actually know each other she could've just seen OP around school or had some of the same friends and decided to just randomly send a friend request but those are just some things off the top of my head however the question I'm wondering is why didn't she just go up and say Hi to OP first before sending a random friend request.
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That's mean sounds like she didn't do anything to you.
I probably should have made a few things clear first, this girl was a total bitch in high school and made fun of me daily. So you can imagine how surprised I was in that horribly awkward situation.