Miscellaneous and ACAB: Today, I got pulled over and ticketed while taking cookies to... - FML

By Anonymous - 25/04/2019 16:00

Today, I got pulled over and ticketed while taking cookies to the local police station. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 880

You deserved it 796

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Same thing different taste

By yulis - 30/11/2013 19:21 - United States - Hagerstown

Today, I got pulled over on the highway for going over the speed limit. The cop seemed nice, and I was sure he'd let me off with a warning, until my husband piped up with, "Didn't think you folks came out this far. What, the donut store got shut down or some shit?" I got the ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 449

You deserved it 7 295

By fatty magoo - 29/07/2014 18:20 - United States - Kirkland

Today, I was pulled over for distracted driving. I'd been eating a donut. Let's just say the officer didn't appreciate being offered one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 300

You deserved it 15 981

Panic mode activated

By Man in car - 11/10/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I got pulled over by a cop car. As I was fumbling for my license and registration, I handed the officer a half-empty bag of Doritos I’d forgotten was in my glove box. He thought I was trying to bribe him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 176

You deserved it 298

By Anonymous - 29/06/2016 02:17 - United States - High Springs

Today, while working as a highway patrol officer, I pulled over my girlfriend for speeding and was required by law to ticket her. Another officer was with me, so I couldn't not ticket her without being reported. We share a joint account, so I basically ticketed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 427

You deserved it 2 763

By Anonymous - 04/02/2017 19:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, at an MA meeting, I ran into the cop who'd pulled me over and given me a ticket for marijuana possession. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 512

You deserved it 1 317

By notdrivinganytimesoon - 04/03/2015 02:35 - United States - Richardson

Today, I got pulled over during my driving test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 270

You deserved it 7 694

By annoyed - 10/02/2009 03:59 - United States

Today, I got a ticket. From my dad the cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 711

You deserved it 18 358

By Sarah-D - 29/07/2016 05:31

Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 274

You deserved it 2 266

By Wick - 26/05/2009 19:47 - United States

Today, I got a speeding ticket while driving to my court date for a prior speeding ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 014

You deserved it 115 357

By Anonymous - 06/01/2012 04:06 - United States

Today, I got pulled over for a busted tail light. The officer gave me a warning and told me to fix it. Ten minutes later I was pulled over again for the same busted tail light by the same cop. This time he wrote me a ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 878

You deserved it 3 700

Next

Top comments

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 25 April 2019 16:42

As far as sucking up to the cops is concerned: Give it arrest!

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Thursday 25 April 2019 17:21

This all depends on why you were pulled over.

Comments

manb91uk 22

Thursday 25 April 2019 16:05

You shouldn't have been in such a rush to take them over there then...

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 25 April 2019 16:42

As far as sucking up to the cops is concerned: Give it arrest!

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Thursday 25 April 2019 17:21

This all depends on why you were pulled over.

dasin 18

Thursday 25 April 2019 21:08

way to stick to the story. we all know it was a bribe that didnt pan out

joi9496 13

Friday 26 April 2019 1:04

Everyone knows it's donuts cops eat 🙄

Giovanni Adamo 16

Friday 26 April 2019 2:13

and an invisible typewriter is good for them too. (chuckles) I m in danger

honestjane 22

Friday 26 April 2019 1:27

Nice thought, but no one that worked at my department would eat anything dropped off by random people. It's just too much of a chance to take, no matter how nice and well intentioned the gift may be.

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Saturday 27 April 2019 5:41

You should've brought donuts instead of cookies. They wouldn't have ticketed you then!

Jonkbaby 22

Saturday 27 April 2019 8:11

do you think you should get a pass?

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The Top

Today, my thieving, layabout stepmom planted weed in my bedroom and showed my dad. Well, maybe I'm jumping to conclusions here, but her smirk and telling me later that I shouldn't fuck with her again seems conclusive to me. Goodbye freedom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 127

You deserved it 3 083

Today, the girl I love who friendzoned me called to talk. She shared the marvelous things she'd done for her friend's birthday, then said, "You had a recent birthday too." Then she laughed. We'd talked multiple times without her mentioning my birthday. She ignored it on Facebook. Time for no contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 194

The Top

Today, I was eating ice cream and struggling to chew a particularly hard chunk of chocolate. After finally breaking it into pieces, I spat it out because it tasted terrible. Then I discovered that I was missing my temporary crown. Now I have no upper molar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 199

You deserved it 6 417

Today, my teenage son reacted to the news of his cousin's death like I’d just told him a bug got squashed on a car windscreen. He didn’t even look away from his computer screen, or react in any way. He seemed more annoyed that I’d interrupted him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 942

You deserved it 198

Today, a man easily 30 years older than me said hi in a bar, but I didn’t engage. Apparently that meant "Please rub your junk on my leg." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 528

You deserved it 281

Today, I disciplined my cat for meowing too loudly in my apartment and disturbing neighbors by picking her up by the scruff. She then proceeded to scratch the ever living crap out of my hand, now it looks like Wolverine got a hold of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 267

You deserved it 2 200

Today, my husband lost his keys again. It's a daily struggle to find them. This time they were in an ice cube, literally. He said he must have accidentally put them in there when making ice. He's going to be the father of my future children. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 373

You deserved it 8 702

Today, my love life is so pathetic that when I got a sample of cologne in the mail, I kept sniffing it just to remind myself what a guy smells like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 850

You deserved it 3 547