By Username - 09/02/2011 03:27

Today, I got mugged. But luckily I had on my keyring the pepper spray that my husband had insisted I keep with me. Unlucky for me, my husband's co-worker, who borrowed my keys, emptied my pepper by spraying it on a brick wall one day when he was bored. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 393
You deserved it 3 109

Same thing different taste

Top comments

krazy_glu3 0

buy another and empty it on his face and tell him that's what the mugger wouldve felt when he was mugging you if he hadn't emptied it out.


I hate muggers. they need to get a life



buy a new can of pepper spray. spray your husband's co worker. then reply "I was bored"

AsianCookie247 14

you should keep wasp spray on you too since it can shot 20 feet away from you and blind them. Also you should go to they have tazers that are shaped normal, flashlights, walking can, an other looks. volts range between 100,000 to 1 million.

#78, are tazers even legal? I don't think they are here in Australia.

in the U.S. tazers are illegal however stun guns aren't. the difference between the two? one is used by police officers and shoots out cables that send an electric jolt through them (tazer) the other requires human contact and is less effective (stun gun). both are commonly (but mistakenly) called tazers.

azurablade 0

ydi for not noticing the WEIGHT of it!

Nightwing98 22

I hate muggers. they need to get a life

Today, I realized I made my name on fml xxxxxJORDYBEARxxxx. FML

therealdavid 0

65~ I gotta say, you look like a drunk Robert Pattinson (yes I misspelled it):P

mintcar 9

Wow, we're picking on people's usernames now?

krazy_glu3 0

buy another and empty it on his face and tell him that's what the mugger wouldve felt when he was mugging you if he hadn't emptied it out.

takeapieandrun 9

A nice way to get a lawsuit...

AsianCookie247 14

but an even better way to get your vengeful anger out! ")

AsianCookie247 14

oh wow- nvm that last comment haha :)

MaximilianMarche 0

25, that's what I was thinking!!!!

AsianCookie247 14

actually, I am. but not fully. I'm half Vietnamese and half Italian.

well that's steryotypical.... what Asians need to have slanty eyes to be Asians? Indians are part of Asia, Russia is part of Asia, are they not? your ignorance is bliss, oh and cookie your pretty! haha

wow, when u need it the most you are all out of it!

no pepper spray? use the assault. you don't need a reason to season, just jump in there and tenderise that mis-steak of a mugger.

go be a failure at being funny somewhere else.

you're pathetic assumptions are more humorous than your innate ability to produce comedy. gg.

*your also i assume you meant inability? otherwise, thank you for that lovely compliment! now i'm glad we're not friends. my friends are smart.

Misspellings fail to provide an accurate measurement of a person's intelligence. good try though.

misuse of words is a rather accurate representation of one's mental and social ability, however. you have work to do. go study!

I'm typing on an iPod. Go cry about grammar and spelling mistakes to your non existent friends. this is the internet. Trollolololol.

so am i. my iPod doesnt switch negative and positive word forms. is yours a special model? you seem pretty hostile. while part of me is concerned and almost wants to ask you what's wrong, most of me is amused. please keep commenting.

You're amused by people insulting you for kicks? Wow, wherever you spawned from must've been an interesting place.

actually it's quite an interesting place, thanks for asking! the last winter olympics was held here, and there's a neat improv studio near my house. our gay village is pretty rad, now that I think about it ... oh, and we're right on the water.

I didn't ask. I never will ask. why the hell would you take the initiative to answer a question that was never inquired. are you really that dense?

well, considering most materials don't pass through me without amassing a considerable amount of speed or force, i would assume that, yes, my body is quite dense. thank you for making sure.

I'm shocked, I thought for sure you would have posted a thoughtless, obnoxious pun riddled paragraph by now. you must be trying very hard to hold back.

it is quite difficult. thank you for acknowledging my guilty pleasure. it means so much that you understand what I struggle with, and that you still stick around and talk to me! gosh, what a charming, upstanding person you are.

you don't even know the half of it captain clueless.

why can't we be friends? why can't we be friends?

comments make this spastic happy apparently.

spastic? oh dear. are you getting upset?

How fitting for such a stupid person to ask a stupid question.

I_R_Genius 3

Wow, no need to fight on this site. I'm surprised the mods haven't removed these comments yet.

I also like trains! model trains are awesome.

perdix 29

The mugger probably would have used the spray on you anyways. If you are going to rely on weapons for self-defense, you have to know enough to keep them ready.

IHeartJimi02 0

I was thinking the same thing. Pepper spray won't do any good if they can not access it easily.