Today, I got a call about my dog who went missing a week ago. The guy who called said "We have your dog, but you aren't getting her back." Then he hung up. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a run with the family dog. I returned home to three missed calls and a hysterical voicemail from my dad. Why? The dog was gone. Not me, his 15 year-old daughter, the dog. FML
Today, I lost my phone. I called the number from my friend's phone, hoping I could find it. A guy answered, laughed "Thanks for the phone!" and hung up. FML
Today, I went to pick up my dog from a friend's place since she agreed to watch him while I went out of state for Spring Break. I arrived at her apartment. She’s gone and the apartment was vacated. She won’t answer her phone or texts, and vanished from all social media. I’m still making payments on the dog. FML
Today, I found a lost dog and called the owner. When he arrived, I thought it would be cute to put the dog down so he would run back into his owner's arms, like in movies. As soon as I put the dog down, it ran away again. FML
Today, my fiancé and I broke up, and he won't answer my calls or texts. I don't want him back; he has my dog. FML
Today, my dog ran away. Luckily my neighbors caught him before he got too far. Now they won't give him back because they think I did something to him to make him want to run away. FML
Today, I got home from work and found my dog missing. When I asked my neighbor if she saw what happened, I saw my dog sleeping on her couch. She tried to say it was hers. FML
Today, I bought a dog to make me feel less lonely. He ran away. FML
Today I adopted a dog. He ran away the same day. FML
Today, I searched our neighborhood for our lost dog. After screaming at the top of our lungs, driving around in circles, and asking strangers, we realized we took him to the groomers this morning. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
"If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it's yours. If it doesn't, it never was." You can either swallow that namby-pamby bullshit, or go house-to-house with a baseball bat until you find your dog and beat the shit out of Cruella DeVil and her henchmen.
zebrapattern 6
*69, figure out what the number is, then look up an address, and bring the police with you so they have to give it back. but take some proof that the dog's yours with you, as well.
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Comments (132)
Carlie_McCartney 1
Trace the call!
JBsGirlee 7
I agree with zebrapattern you have to call the police
PrettySure 3
Use the number to trace them, then take your dog back! I would flail.
bryan788 29
Call the cops,
AerBear115 15
Have the police trace the call.
imazaari 12
What if your dog was obese and they didn't want to return it because you're killing it with kindness? It's probably not the case but there are a ton of people in just my city that shouldn't be allowed to have pets.
teentee401 37
Call the police and track the phone call to the dognapper and your dog.
lolly_bags 18
I wish OP would come back on FML and say if he/she ever got his dog back!
doglover100 29
Can the police trace the call?
Baller_Bob 17
Trace that ************'s number down and kill him slowly by carving out his eyeballs with a rusty fork then make him eat one eyeball while you make the other eyeball watch it and then make him eat the other eye. Then rip his dick off and feed it to your dog while punching his nuts. Then put his body in the center of a pentagram and offer him as a sacrifice to Satan so he can butt **** him for eternity with his flaming barbed wire dick. And then take your dog back and live happily ever after.