By Ineedlotsofwater - 23/01/2015 16:41 - United States - Seattle

Today, I found out why I receive random drug tests at work. The safety department was specifically told by my boss to check up on me because I always seem way too cheerful to not be high. I've passed every single test. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 727
You deserved it 2 736

Same thing different taste

Top comments

On the bright side, you'll probably cheer up about that situation very soon with how cheerful you are, buddy.

I personally feel like in a sense that's a compliment! A lot of people wish they could seem as happy as that I'm sure! Congrats on passing every test, really showed them! :)

Comments

saffy66 34

They are right. Nobody should be that cheerful at work ;)

Well done OP you get a gold star ⭐️

Heres what you do. Start eating poppy seeds a lot. Then when you get another drug test they will get a false positive. They fire you. Immediately run to a doctor to have bloodwork done to test for drugs be sure to tell him that the poppy seeds gave you a false positive at work and you need to prove its a false positive so they do extensive testing.. He will find out it was just poppy seeds. Sue the company for wrongful termination. Profit.

gintwinsmoore 20

sounds good to me!!!! he'll I'm gonna try that one!!!! thanks #38!!!!

Scorpio1691 29

Just make sure you have a dated photo and 3 independent witnesses (your boss if possible being 1) of you eating said poppy seed food item - otherwise the drug test vs your word.

gintwinsmoore 20

keep passing, OP. that'll show them Assholes not to just single you out.

For someone with a natural marijuana attitude, I'm surprised you even have FML moments. Maybe this is your way of telling people to calm down!! I like it.

I'm also really cheerful at work, and I'm surprised this hasn't happened to me yet. But I sympathize.

Same thing happened to me. I also passed all of the tests. After the fourth test my work figured it out and talked to me....I explained that I am just a happy person and motivated. I informed them that I would have to consider quitting if they couldn't trust me to not be on drugs. or at least just give me regular tests with everyone else. They have since left me alone. I am happy to know that they think I am good enough at my job and decided not to fire me. Working with people who now trust me has also been. plus at work. I still don't think I was that crazy....I just smile all the time and am optimistic. What is wrong with not being upset or mad and with always being happy? I would rather keep the feelings for home or a counselor.

Scorpio1691 29

That's good to be so happy and motivated all the time. Its a rare quality - one i know i definitely don't have.

Not if they have 'probable cause'. Luckily for your boss, that term is so incredibly vague, he can make up pretty much anything and it will be ok. You can try reporting it to the HR department, but it really depends if you will be successful...

A total lack of professional trust that should certainly be reported for.

At least you are always a very positive person!