Health: Today, I found out after a lot of panic and a visit to the gynecologist... - FML

By stoolgal - 23/09/2016 06:19 - United States - Yukon

Today, I found out after a lot of panic and a visit to the gynecologist that the lump in my vagina isn't cancer. I was just constipated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 520

You deserved it 1 454

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Same thing different taste

Full of…

By weman - 04/09/2021 02:00

Today, I went to the doctor to see if she could check a lump in my vagina. She pushed the lump and asked, "Does this make you want to use the bathroom for a number 2?" I said yes. Turns out, it’s hard poop pushing against my intestines and the outside vagina wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 009

You deserved it 181

By Sostupid - 24/01/2011 03:41 - Canada

Today, I had a panic attack because I was constipated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 514

You deserved it 8 803

Full of it

By romoangel - 21/04/2020 05:00

Today, I felt a very sharp pain, like my appendix was going to burst. After going to the doctor, I was rushed to the hospital to get tests done. The doctors later told me there's nothing wrong, I was just constipated. I went to the hospital for them to basically tell me I'm full of shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 526

You deserved it 572

It all adds up

By Anonymous - 02/11/2022 12:00

Today, I went to hospital for a potential stomach bug. According to a CT scan, I also found out that I have uterine fibroids as well. Yay for being a woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 836

You deserved it 112

Hi there little guy

By NotAGoodDay - 10/08/2016 18:57 - United Kingdom - Sudbury

Today, I had severe constipation. I went to get some more laxatives when I felt something fall onto the top of my head. I reached up to see what it was and it turned out to be quite a large spider. Guess who isn't constipated anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 668

You deserved it 1 138

By billiams15 - 06/05/2012 21:57 - United States - Katy

Today, I got my colonoscopy results back. I had hoped they'd show what's been causing my stomach pains for the last few weeks, but instead it turns out that my colon is healthy and normal. I basically got cornholed for no goddamn reason. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 441

You deserved it 4 336

Hypochondriac

By Stepheroni - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, I went to the doctor to ask what the weird white lump was on my back, and if it was cancer. He told me it was the biggest pimple he'd ever seen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 844

You deserved it 692

Breaking news

By Anonymous - 08/10/2025 00:00

Today, after nerve pain and trouble sitting down, I found a lump in my ass crack. My doctor thought might be a tumour or cancer, so I was sent for scans. Apparently my whole life I’ve had an ingrown vestigial tail at the bottom of my spine hidden under the skin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 405

You deserved it 69

By blehh - 14/04/2009 20:40 - United States

Today, I had horrible pains in my stomach area so I went to the doctors. They couldn't find anything wrong and sent me to the Emergency Room for X-rays. After spending the entire day in the hospital, they tell me I'm slightly constipated. I had to pay $400 to find out I had to take a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 304

You deserved it 54 682

It's a sign!

By unknown951 - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff

Today, I went to the doctor because recently I've had a white liquid coming from my breast. I found out it's milk. I'm not pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 040

You deserved it 4 830

Next

Top comments

satanistxxangel 8

Friday 23 September 2016 18:23

Fmls like these need a wtf button

DrafteeSelf 24

Friday 23 September 2016 18:21

Constipated ******?

Comments

TheNerdyVillager 2

Monday 26 September 2016 20:17

holy ****

_RedRum_OG 4

Thursday 29 September 2016 21:10

how does that happen??

mrBearBear 11

Sunday 2 October 2016 14:44

For those confused the vaginal canal and rectum are very close together. If there's poop sitting in your rectum you'll be able to feel it when you insert your fingers into your ****** and press back/down slightly. If you're still confused look up a picture of women's anatomy and you'll see how close the two tubes are to each other.

lucasj23 11

Tuesday 12 June 2018 16:15

this makes no sense. why would constipation give you a lump in your ******. do you pop from there?

mymegangirl 7

Friday 31 May 2019 15:58

this makes no sense. what does your ****** have to do with being constipated?

TheGestalt97 11

Wednesday 3 June 2020 10:41

well I mean at least it wasn’t cancer

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