Transportation: Today, I discovered that, because my boyfriend has locked himself...

By novdestiny - 30/06/2017 16:00

Today, I discovered that, because my boyfriend has locked himself out of his car so many times, he now keeps a coat hanger to break in. He keeps it IN the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 285

You deserved it 372

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Same thing different taste

By artmfanforever - 22/09/2010 20:39 - United States

Today, I locked myself out of my car. While walking home to retrieve the spare, I realized I locked my house keys inside the house this morning. Now I must decide whether to break into my house or car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 335

You deserved it 25 766

By losing the plot - 08/04/2015 19:36 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, after locking myself out of my house, I let myself into my car to wait on someone with a spare key. It took me 15 minutes to realise the house and car key share the same ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 592

You deserved it 17 508

By seththing - 22/05/2016 03:49

Today, I locked my keys in my car. I had a spare key in my wallet, that I also left in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 098

You deserved it 3 173

By cockalicious - 01/03/2011 05:29

Today, my boyfriend let me know he wanted me to leave by repeatedly jabbing me with my car keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 705

You deserved it 5 020

Paranoia

By Anonymous - 24/05/2022 00:00 - Australia

Today, when I got up for work, I went into the bathroom and saw a coat hanger sitting in the crack of the window. I had a panic attack, thinking someone had tried to break in and grabbed a knife. I ran into the room where my boyfriend was sleeping and he said he put it there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 610

You deserved it 285

Did you smash?

By Silverfeathery - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Lewiston

Today, I was making out with a guy in his car, when we decided we needed a minute of fresh air. We stepped out, only to completely lock ourselves out, with our phones and the keys inside. We had to smash a window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 858

You deserved it 3 021

By Smile - 27/11/2008 04:21 - France

Today, after numerous attempts, my car door still wouldn't unlock. After going ballistic on the lock, the key broke off inside. I then realized it wasn't my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 472

You deserved it 31 413

By WhatTheF - 11/07/2016 05:42

Today, after far too many times of my brother stealing food out of my own personal mini fridge, I bought a lock and chained the handles together. I came back to find that my brother had responded by breaking the doors off their hinges. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 903

You deserved it 1 126

By Anon - 30/01/2019 00:00

Today, the little bell in my car that lets you know your keys are still in your ignition went out. How did I find out? I locked myself out of both my house and my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 968

You deserved it 573

By ApparentWeirdo - 06/06/2017 14:00

Today, my boyfriend called me weird because I keep gloves in the glove box in my car. He's never seen that before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 886

You deserved it 334

anyoldnamewilldo 23

Friday 30 June 2017 18:14

Please do not reproduce with this man

Lobby_Bee 17

Friday 30 June 2017 16:17

Pro Tip: Replace the antenna with the coat hanger. Your boyfriend will never have this problem again.

Comments

Lobby_Bee 17

Friday 30 June 2017 16:17

Pro Tip: Replace the antenna with the coat hanger. Your boyfriend will never have this problem again.

anyoldnamewilldo 23

Friday 30 June 2017 18:14

Please do not reproduce with this man

WeirdUS 29

Friday 30 June 2017 19:56

If he doesn't understand why this is a bad idea here's your sign

GhostFox 33

Saturday 1 July 2017 0:40

I give him an A for intentions but an F for execution.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I told my ultra-Catholic mother that I was hanging out with a girl. While walking out of the flat, I didn't realize that I'd dropped one of my condoms out of my pocket. My mother saw it and ripped it apart, then yelled at me that, "Sex is for having children! You're giving yourselves to Satan!" I'm 20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 244

You deserved it 319

Today, my daughter is not only an expert in escaping her diaper but also in leaving her mark on every surface possible. Today's masterpiece: a poop trail on the hotel room rug. It was like a modern art installation, but with a distinctive smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 174

The Top

Today, my daughter had ice cream while I was napping. She didn't want me to know so she put the bowl in the trashcan and put the spoon in the garbage disposal and turned it on, because she thought it would make the spoon disappear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 821

You deserved it 5 720

Today, I visited my doctor upon coming home from University. I found out that I'm severely allergic to our pet bunny, which has resulted in a rash taking over my body. She suggested that we get rid of the bunny. I told my mom. She told me to come home less often. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 940

You deserved it 3 164

Today, I had to ride in the back seat of a car, next to a large, hyperactive dog who experiences nervous bowel movements. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 513

You deserved it 1 655

Today, I had my wisdom teeth pulled. I woke up right as the dentist pulled my last tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 391

You deserved it 3 484

Today, the cute guy in my class asked if I wanted to come over to his house to "study" on Saturday for our finals. I went to his house expecting a good time. He actually wanted to study. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 753

You deserved it 54 320

Today, I created myself a Dropbox folder named "Traffic fines". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 299

You deserved it 5 631

Same thing different taste

Paranoia

Did you smash?

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