Today, I broke up with my girlfriend because I felt unappreciated. She found it appropriate to sarcastically say, "Oh no, how will I ever be able to open my jars?" FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my plate. She responded by throwing an empty plate at my windshield. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was ecstatic. Apparently, she'd been trying to figure out how to break up with me for the past four months. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She then proceeded to ask for all the gifts she gave me for Christmas back. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, because I was apparently "too good" for her. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was so angry, she stabbed me in the hand with a plastic fork. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, all because whenever I laugh I say "lol." FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me by putting a Post-it note on my locker that said, "Consider yourself dumped." FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML
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Top comments
fifi125 21
Superglue them all shut and then see how much she needs you!
Steve95401 49
She will also miss your ability to reach things on the top shelf.
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Comments (119)
LastResort318 14
Depends on the situation wether you are a inconsiderate bitch or just a smart ass.
shino411cute 13
I like her she sounds funny
Nevrdai 5
... What a bitch.
psychiccloud 7
You can do so much better
niksatter96 20
Hey man don't sweat it just a girl who actually appreciates you because you obviously deserve better
nerdgrrl888 5
Sounds like you made the right call!
Medhi_fml 18
Good riddance. It's better this way :)
lalaney 14
Wow, good on you for dumping her. Usually when you're the one who cares more, it's way harder to break up. That must've taken a lot of courage!
Cebolamole 13
You're better off, OP.
Inciter 33
It sounds like you're better off without her.