Today, I bought a $300 gym membership that gives me access to the company's non-premium gyms. The non-premium gyms are all closed due to construction, because they're being turned into premium gyms. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as I'd been going to a gym with my wife as a guest on her account, I joined as a regular member. However, before I had time to go under my own membership, the gym closed down due to the coronavirus. FML
Today, I paid $500 for a gym membership after moving into a brand new house, since 12 years of software development has taken its toll. When I told my instructor about my goal to lose 35lbs in two months, he simply said, "Yeah... That's not going to happen. Try another gym," and left promptly. FML
Today, I applied to a new gym. Now I have a hernia. FML
Today, it was my first day at a new gym, which cost a fortune. Some skinny teen who had clearly never lifted in his life dropped a weight while I was stretching and broke my ankle. Money down the drain. FML
Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months and couldn't figure out how to use any of the equipment. FML
Today, I was denied membership to an all-women's gym. Why? Because "men are not permitted to join". I am and have always been female. FML
Today, I bought a $450 elliptical machine to get in shape of the new year. After 5 hours of putting it together, I realized that all the ceilings in every room of my apartment are too low for me to use it without hitting my head. I can't return it. FML
Today, I went to the gym after months of procrastinating. I walked straight into the glass wall next to the entrance instead of the door. A guy lifting near the front desk winced in sympathy. I still worked out, but I could see my face slowly swelling in the mirror. FML
Today, I went to the new gym I recently signed up for and started exercising in the men-filled weights room, despite being intimidated by them and the strange looks they were giving me. Workout over, I left the room and saw in front of me a door marked, "Women's weights room." Oh. FML
Today, I determined that the only reason I still have a membership to my gym is that the special gummy bears they have in the vending machines are amazing. FML
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Top comments
OneBigMessUp 5
Hopefully you can get a refund?:)
Soloman212 28
Why is everyone saying it's ironic? It's not. What would have been ironic was if he used to have premium, and DOWNGRADED to non-premium.
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Comments (165)
Stylin_Since_97 10
You don't need a gym membership to exercise or work-out. Sucks to be you bro!
alisidewinder 9
should have asked for a week's pass before buying. that way you would have KNOWN that the gyms are all upgrading. YDI
katyglaze 3
I can't believe someone sold you that membership and just let you walk away thinking you were going to the gym later, and the entire time they were probably thinking 'good job - you just wasted $300.'
sunnydaleslayer 4
Well surely you'll be able to get a refund, if you paid for a non premium gym pass, and there converting into premium gyms, either they'll refund your money or let you use the premium gym at the non premium gym price, its a win, win =)
physicist48 0
You should be able to get a refund.
HomeAl0ne 20
You'll still be able to get exercise by jumping up and down and crying. On the plus side, the construction work for the other guys should be finished just that little bit faster now, thanks to your donation.
sammarrythatgirl 2
I'm more worried about the fact that you paid $300 for a non-premium gym membership. Are there any Planet Fitness' around? I think they're only about $10-20 per month, depending on the plan you choose.
sparxva 12
Go back and demand access to the premium gyms under your existing membership. If they refuse, cancel and refuse to pay since they did not provide access to the non-premium gyms as agreed. Decide which outcome you prefer and take charge of the situation.
sparxva 12
Finishing the thought: this is actually a "my life is awesome" as soon as you get your access to the premium gyms for the discounted price you paid. But first you're going to have to grow a pair.
dlocruz 0
Fail!
Calyx_fml 22
Buy some running shoes and a kettlebell and you don't need a gym.