Today, I attempted to ask a girl out by doing a flash mob and singing for her in the store where she works. Turns out, she suffers from anxiety and the overwhelming amount of attention caused a panic attack. No, I didn't get a date. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I took my girlfriend out to a fancy restaurant for her birthday. I'd arranged beforehand for some of the staff to come out and sing happy birthday to her, but it all backfired when she started panicking and had a serious anxiety attack from all the attention. FML
Today, I asked a girl I like out. She ended up having an asthma attack because she was laughing so hard. I guess that's a no. FML
Today, while trying to score a date, I almost made a girl pass out. No, I didn't try to chloroform her, I just came across as so pathetic that she laughed hard enough to have an asthma attack. FML
Today, I worked up the courage to ask someone out after months of debating it. She smiled, said yes, and asked what time. I got so nervous that I gave her the time I start work instead of our reservation. We both showed up to completely different places and spent twenty minutes wondering why the other had ghosted us. FML
Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. She was so excited that she had a severe asthma attack and ended up in hospital. Her answer was yes, but her parents won't let me anywhere near her now. They say I'm lucky they haven't sued me for "trying to kill her". FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She promptly had a panic attack and screamed, "No!" FML
Today, I decided to talk to a girl at the gym I had seen there a lot. I walked up to her at the station she was at and asked her out to dinner sometime. I didn't realize she had been wearing headphones. She took them off and asked if I was waiting on the station. My courage left. I said yes. FML
Today, to help me get over my crippling social anxiety, my therapist encouraged me to sing in front of a crowd, since I actually have a fine singing voice. I ended up fainting onstage, mid-song. FML
Today, I asked a girl out and made plans to go see a movie. About 5 minutes in, I made a move to put my arm around her and smashed her in the face. FML
Today, I finally got the courage to ask out a girl I've had a crush on for months now. She told me I was very cute and then walked off. I still don't have an answer. FML
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Top comments
debbster7 18
Why go all out when something as simple as you saying "will you go out with me?" would work? Save that shit for marriage proposals.
Vidrill 22
Well, maybe try to tone down the extravagant gestures towards people you don't know very well yet? I hope she appreciated the effort, though....
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Comments (83)
meloman95 7
You got a video of that?
hannahsnyder69 16
I've never heard that one before
RubbarDuckie 9
i think it was a cute gesture. Sorry OP
Anonymous_17221 11
I would still have gone out with you because of the sweet idea :D
unixdude 9
Know your target market when attempting any marketing.
Sacytrl 28
Sometimes, being simple does the trick. No need to go so far to garner all the attention and put unnecessary pressure on the poor lady. Hopefully, you get a second chance with her
thatisfuckedup 6
Please explain to me what in god's name is wrong with "will you go out with me?" Still, if that relationship progressed, it would be interesting to see what the MARRIAGE proposal will look like, now wouldn't it? FYL though, but I suggest directness. It worked for me in all four of my failed romances.
Layswag 3
It's the thought that counts?
nurchok 15
Just talk to her and explain yourself...
violette_tiger 7
You tried to sweep her off her feet ;)