Today, I attempted to ask a girl out by doing a flash mob and singing for her in the store where she works. Turns out, she suffers from anxiety and the overwhelming amount of attention caused a panic attack. No, I didn't get a date. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took my girlfriend out to a fancy restaurant for her birthday. I'd arranged beforehand for some of the staff to come out and sing happy birthday to her, but it all backfired when she started panicking and had a serious anxiety attack from all the attention. FML
Today, I asked a girl I like out. She ended up having an asthma attack because she was laughing so hard. I guess that's a no. FML
Today, while trying to score a date, I almost made a girl pass out. No, I didn't try to chloroform her, I just came across as so pathetic that she laughed hard enough to have an asthma attack. FML
Today, I worked up the courage to ask someone out after months of debating it. She smiled, said yes, and asked what time. I got so nervous that I gave her the time I start work instead of our reservation. We both showed up to completely different places and spent twenty minutes wondering why the other had ghosted us. FML
Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. She was so excited that she had a severe asthma attack and ended up in hospital. Her answer was yes, but her parents won't let me anywhere near her now. They say I'm lucky they haven't sued me for "trying to kill her". FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She promptly had a panic attack and screamed, "No!" FML
Today, I decided to talk to a girl at the gym I had seen there a lot. I walked up to her at the station she was at and asked her out to dinner sometime. I didn't realize she had been wearing headphones. She took them off and asked if I was waiting on the station. My courage left. I said yes. FML
Today, to help me get over my crippling social anxiety, my therapist encouraged me to sing in front of a crowd, since I actually have a fine singing voice. I ended up fainting onstage, mid-song. FML
Today, I asked a girl out and made plans to go see a movie. About 5 minutes in, I made a move to put my arm around her and smashed her in the face. FML
Today, I finally got the courage to ask out a girl I've had a crush on for months now. She told me I was very cute and then walked off. I still don't have an answer. FML
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Top comments
debbster7 18
Why go all out when something as simple as you saying "will you go out with me?" would work? Save that shit for marriage proposals.
Vidrill 22
Well, maybe try to tone down the extravagant gestures towards people you don't know very well yet? I hope she appreciated the effort, though....
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Comments (83)
La_Donna 3
Guess you shouldn't have tried so hard. It would have come off as insincere anyway. Also, "you didn't get the date"? Get over yourself. I feel bad for the girl! **** her life, man!
buckdharma 38
Maybe you should try secret admirer letters delivered by a man in a black suit next.
Dusty_Busters 15
Are you surprised?
theyreafteryou 5
An organized group of several dozen people suddenly appearing at your work place is not funny. And to top it off, it appears your scenario was to have the people play internet stalkers of the girl in question, with you being their leader. Anxiety or not, I just don't get what you thought the best case scenario would be...
titibug823 11
While the grand gesture is sweet... its best to ask someone out simply by asking them out, one on one.
silencebabyy 23
thats so sweet. it reminds me of a glee episode. i would love for a guy to ask me out like that makes me know he really cares. i hope shes ok and maybe theres still hope
CookieLovesBoo 16
That's really a attempt at least you went for it instead of waited because you were too afraid .
Dusksoul2001 13
That's so sweet! She doesn't deserve you for declining! I know she had a panic attack but afterwards she could've said yes.
A_la_asshole 2
Are you ******* kidding me? He gave her a panic attack but she doesn't deserve him? have you thought she might be embarrassed because of her panic attack? Or maybe just mad he gave her a panic attack in front of tons of people? Not only ghat but its her ******* choice. This FML sounds like OP didn't know the girl too well in the first place. So what you're saying is pretty much "this guy is really nice but you don't know him that well but **** him Anyways because he's really nice!" That's asinine and you sound moronc, you insolent little ****.
Axipiter 24
I agreed with you right up to the point where you went off on your little tirade. COMPLETELY unecessary.
Brownie101abc 7
YDI. A flash mob? Really?
Axel5238 29
Sorry OP, but a lot of these big gestures back fire. A lot of those proposals at sporting events don't work out. Some appreciate the gesture, but often times the pressure makes the person royally uncomfortable and forces them to say yes and if they don't people feel like they are being heartless.