Today, I arranged to have some flowers delivered at work for Valentine's Day so that my colleagues will think someone likes me. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I bought myself a flower for Valentine's Day to be delivered to myself from "Anonymous". FML
Today, I resorted to buying some expensive flowers and sending them to my boss anonymously with a mysterious love letter, just to get her to lighten the hell up and stop constantly harassing and berating me over every little thing. FML
Today, I got flowers from a secret admirer. Turns out they were from my sister's in-laws who own a flower shop. Apparently, everyone feels bad that I'm single and they are convinced I'm gonna die alone. FML
Today, I ordered flowers to be delivered to my workplace on Tuesday. To myself. For my birthday. Because even though birthdays are posted in the monthly newsletter, mine gets left out every year. For the past four years. FML
Today, I got flowers sent to my work, I happily opened them in front of my co-workers thinking they were from my crush, I open the card to see "Love you, from mom". My mother thinks my love life is so pathetic, thats she needs to send me flowers to cheer me up. FML
Today, I sent flowers to my ex, scheduled to be delivered after work in the evening. She texted me at midday thanking me for the flowers. I looked at my shipping order and they haven’t been sent yet. FML
Today, just so my family would think someone might actually be interested in me, I bought myself roses and attached a secret admirer card to them. My plan would have worked if I hadn't forgotten to take the receipt off the kitchen counter. FML
Today, I sent the girl I like flowers, only to have her later post a picture of them online, saying, "Ha! When losers send you flowers." FML
Today, I received a bunch of flowers from my 'lover'. This would be fine, except that I don't have a lover, and my boyfriend now thinks I'm cheating. FML
Today, my Mom came to pay me a short visit at college. She handed me some flowers, which were a Valentine's Day gift, because she "figured I wouldn't be getting any from anyone else this year." FML
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Top comments
spikey818 9
I do that every year.
muchagente 5
good idea... so everyone who might be interested in you will think "oh damn, she's engaged, i've got no chance anyway". makes sure you stay lonely.
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Comments (83)
herop 0
woow what an idea !!!
three3_fml 2
Loose some weight, and stop dressing like a boy, maybe someone will notice you.
xcarxcrashx 9
why does it ALWAYS have to be about weight?
catatonicsleep 17
Didn't you know, anyone above a 4 is instantly unattractive! (sarcasm by the way)
chocolatedream 0
Aww that's so sad :( But you shouldn't stoop that low just so your colleagues think you have somebody It's nice to be single, you can put your needs ahead of the other and you won't waste money on gifts! :)
n0obpr0 4
bitches do this every year.
sunnysurfchick 0
Why are they so important that you would go through all that just so they think you have someone special?
aback 5
Because *they're* the most meaningful relationships she has!
fayola 2
tbh they probably don't even care, an wouldn't have noticed if you didn't get any.
Person1233 13
Forever alone.
xcarxcrashx 9
People buy themselves flowers ALL THE TIME, (I manage a floral shop) it's okay!
sourgirl101 29
I buy myself flowers.(: every time my house is cleaned spotless. It's like the frosting on the cake. But I've never made people think it was from someone else. I think that's what makes the difference here.
mintcar 10
Theres nothing wrong with buying something for yourself, but the reason why you bought the flowers is ******* pathetic. it's Valentines Day, just like any other day. They don't care about you or about the made up guy who sent you those flowers.
rattusrattus 19
JESUS CHRIST YOU'RE A LOSER. Do you think you're validated by having a boyfriend or something? Grow up. It's not the 18th Century and a woman's worth is not judged by whether she has a man or not. Also Valentine's Day is pointless and a moneyspinner for business. Because it shows how much you appreciate another person by spending £20 on some cheesy, vomit-inducing card and gift then taking them out to a restaurant that is so packed you can't hear each other and it winds up being stressful for all. And yes, I am in a relationship, this isn't the single person anti-Valentines rant.