Today, I'm laying in my holiday apartment with the patio doors open, listening to the german man next door take dirty pics of his wife on the balcony. I'm too scared to get up and shut the door. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, after staying at my boyfriend's house for the first time, I got in the shower. His bathroom door doesn't lock, so half way through my shower he walked in. Trying to be sexy, I pressed myself up against the glass, which turned out the be a door that opens outwards. I fell on the floor. FML
Today, I found out that my shower area is in direct view from my neighbours' balcony. I realised this when I caught my neighbour and his wife watching me while I was getting dressed. I've been living here for 7 years. FML
Today, while looking at a house to buy, I opened a bathroom door. There was a naked man on the toilet. FML
Today, after taking a refreshing shower, I found out that due to a newly-built platform, people in the apartment underneath can see right into my bedroom. While I was standing there completely naked, some guy smiled at me. FML
Today, I found out that I bought a house next door to crazy people. She asked me if I would mind not showering when her husband is at home, because he can hear me and knowing I’m naked on the other side of the wall turns him on, which is a nuisance for her. He’s unemployed. He’s always at home, the creep. FML
Today, I heard my neighbors having a violent argument in their front yard. I listened in, and soon found out why the wife wasn't happy with her husband. Apparently, she had caught her husband peeking through my windows for the second time this month. FML
Today, I'm on vacation in Germany and in our seemingly normal hotel my fucking door won't stop opening and closing by itself, and I can't fucking sleep. Jesus Christ ghost, go away, I don't wanna die as well. I thought this hotel would be nice. FML
Today, my fiancé has been jumping out of closets and from around corners with a video camera, trying to catch me naked. He says he wants to post a video online so his old high school friends can "rate" me. I'm now afraid to get intimate, shower, or even change my clothes in my own home. FML
Today, sick of the unfiltered noise we hear from our neighbours in our upstairs apartment, as we're above their fence line, we signed the lease on an apartment downstairs. While I was downstairs, my partner clomped upstairs, opened the bathroom door, and took a piss. I heard EVERYTHING. FML
Today, after taking a shower, I realised that my landlord was peeking in the whole time through broken ventilator. Once he tried to get into my room, using his keys. I couldn't tell the landlord's wife, as I didn't have any proof so I left the house, even though my rent was long due. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
torrtorr 17
OMG, so funny. Just get up and shut it. Grow up lol
goodread2200 10
What will they do? I'm guessing they are already comfortable with people seeing. You know what would be really funny - paper planes flying out your balcony door while they're doing the shoot.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (17)
torrtorr 17
OMG, so funny. Just get up and shut it. Grow up lol
sunshine1421 14
they want you to see them... suck it up maybe youll enjoy it
Glowworm56 27
"Ooh yah, Helga! Now bite into that sausage!"
Jenmic 16
Essen meine Scheiße! Okie Dokie.
Konarika 11
You tried, and you failed.
Winchesterbride 9
food my shit? nopes. how about versucht es gar nicht wenn ihr es ned könnt please
ArbiterOfFML 24
eat my shit.
species4872 20
Do you get fries with that?
goodread2200 10
What will they do? I'm guessing they are already comfortable with people seeing. You know what would be really funny - paper planes flying out your balcony door while they're doing the shoot.
Lillysar91 20
Oh heilige scheiße
RichardPencil 32
They're probably normal pictures. It's the German that makes them seem dirty -- it sounds like BSDM talk!
skippydoda 32
Start shouting encouragements to her. "work it! " "make love to the camera " "remember to smile with your eyes "
Colon_Man 17
When I got to, "dirty pics", I reread the whole thing in Larry The Cable Guy's voice. "Got them dirty pictures on my phone..."
Winchesterbride 9
ah die deutschen. immer nackig trotzen.