Health: Today, after having my jaw wired shut for 2 months, I finally... - FML

By Anonymous - 08/03/2011 23:23 - United States

Today, after having my jaw wired shut for 2 months, I finally got to eat. During the first bite of my sandwich I pulled my jaw out of place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 853

You deserved it 4 894

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

I'm fragile, OK?

By Anonymous - 13/09/2023 10:00

Today, I lost a tooth and got my jaw wired shut after my toddler managed to break my jaw by whacking me with a plastic toy. Hello at least 8 weeks of being unable to talk while only eating meals that have been thoroughly blitzed into a liquid form first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 698

You deserved it 110

By brokenface - 15/09/2015 21:48 - United States - Notre Dame

Today, I finally kicked my awful nail-biting habit. All it took was a fractured jaw. I haven't been able to chew anything for two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 669

You deserved it 2 644

By cherknobil - 07/07/2019 00:00

Today, I went to my favorite burger joint. Upon taking the first bite of my burger, I dislocated my jaw. The employees had to call 911. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 746

You deserved it 199

Hole in one

By Anonymous - 24/04/2023 02:00 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, I got a tooth pulled out. I now have a hole connecting my mouth to my nose. Drinking and eating is whole new experience. FML

I agree, your life sucks 684

You deserved it 93

Great idea

By dumbbb - 27/12/2011 08:30 - United States

Today, I tried to open the door with my mouth because my hands were full. I chipped a tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 263

You deserved it 46 015

Snap, crackle, and pop

By Anonymous - 30/09/2023 22:00

Today, I woke up from my wisdom tooth surgery… while they were still sawing my jaw. I had such a bad panic response that they also cut my lip, so I have stitches inside and outside of my mouth, as well as the haunting crackle of bone being removed from my skull stuck in my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 758

You deserved it 79

Numb

By A.J. - 13/04/2019 08:00 - United States

Today, I had a dentist appointment in which a nurse numbed my mouth. After coming home, I took a nap in which I unknowing bit through my top lip. I physically can't speak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 869

You deserved it 170

Hangry time

By Anonymous - 21/04/2011 18:18 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to the dentist to have a tooth pulled. The day before, I was too anxious to eat anything, so I went in with an empty stomach. There were complications during the extraction and now I'm not allowed to eat for the next 24 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 970

You deserved it 9 708

By braceface - 14/03/2012 20:12 - United States

Today, I got my braces put on. This is the second time I've had them. The first time was after my cousin opened a car door in my face. This time a jock punched me in the mouth for saying that Reese's taste the same as Snickers peanut butter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 047

You deserved it 6 919

By ouch - 05/10/2015 19:20 - United States - Stockton

Today, I cracked my tooth. I was so tired I put my pretzel stick in my tea and took a bite out of my spoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 868

You deserved it 3 760

Next

Top comments

track69 3

Wednesday 9 March 2011 8:36

wow that's terrible I'm sorry

scottovious 0

Wednesday 9 March 2011 8:38

That sucks. Jaw pain is horrid. So Sorry, I hope it gets better...

Comments

Hidden_Angel 0

Thursday 10 March 2011 10:44

I feel your pain on the not eatin much part, i had my jaw wired shut for about the same amount of time when i had jaw surgery about 3 years ago. Hope you get better, sendin tons of support to ya.

nvrbasik 0

Thursday 10 March 2011 12:06

got a tad bit excited eh?

LaciNic0le 0

Thursday 10 March 2011 23:29

awe :/

ballinballinb 0

Friday 11 March 2011 5:20

damn girl, how big of a sandwich were you trying to eat?

bobateme 0

Tuesday 15 March 2011 7:25

A rather jaw dropping situation :D

superman7268 3

Wednesday 16 March 2011 23:51

sewer if ur a girl then I'm sorry but if ur a guy.... HAHAHAHA

theybebitchin 4

Sunday 20 March 2011 4:17

wow, ******* retard much?

__doge__ 15

Friday 10 June 2016 15:07

Sexist... Very sexist

pfizzle16 0

Wednesday 23 March 2011 4:48

that is a real fml. like that is just awful im so sorry haha

birchknollbabe32 0

Sunday 1 May 2011 22:15

no shit fyl. that's why he said fml

poopy56 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 6:40

wait why would you ever get ur jaw wired shut

markcst 2

Friday 1 July 2011 4:01

your doctor didn't tell you only liquids for the first few days?

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Today, a person I've never met called me a whore and spat on me. Why? Because I was babysitting for my neighbors and answered the door for two well dressed women passing out religious pamphlets. I politely declined to take any. Apparently being a 15 year-old girl caring for a toddler makes me a sex worker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 565

You deserved it 61

Today, I realized that I'm the only person in my house not getting any. My sister is sleeping with my ex. My roommate is sleeping with my brother, and my mom texted me, asking to make it look like she slept in her bed so that she didn't have to do the "walk of shame" in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 457

You deserved it 2 906

The Top

Today, my girlfriend of two years called me over late at night. I got excited, assuming she finally wanted sex. No, she just wanted me to make her mac and cheese and talk to her because she was ‘restless’. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 535

You deserved it 903

Today, I met my biological parents for the first time, 29 years into my life. They turned out to be two of the most pathetic people I have ever met, and the meeting ended after they asked me to lend them money because I "literally owe them my life." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 779

You deserved it 2 688

Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 587

You deserved it 5 533

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night and had to go to the bathroom in my dorm. After coming out of the bathroom, I realized I'd let my auto-locking door close behind me. I had to go through the whole dorm, sprint across campus in my bra and underwear, and ask someone for my spare key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 401

You deserved it 1 869

Today, I told my mom that I wanted professional head-shots done for Christmas. When asked why, I said "I want to submit them to a modeling agency." My mom exchanged looks with my sister before laughing so hard that she wet herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 745

You deserved it 7 013

Today, after returning to the UK from my Australian holiday, I was fired from my job for no reason. My boss told me he'd waited till I'd returned to do it. I could have stayed in Australia with my mates traveling for a year if I had been fired before I left. I'm sure he did it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 909

You deserved it 2 861