Poopoo peepee, Gross and Roommate: The smell test - FML

The smell test

By sosadstudent - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Netherlands

Today, I realized I can tell which one of my 6 roommates has taken a dump, just based on the smell emanating from the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 098

You deserved it 4 449

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Same thing different taste

Glade

By stinkystinky - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff

Today, after cleaning the whole house, I still couldn't get rid of the foul smell. Later, my roommate revealed his new place to "stash and dry" his socks: The ventilation ducts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 931

You deserved it 964

Night time entertainment

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, I woke up next to my roommate staring in horror. She said I was singing and farting in my sleep. Loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 276

You deserved it 423

Close encounters

By Pinkie - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to announce to the whole house that I was going the bathroom, because the lock on the door is broken. Before I had the chance to wipe, my dad loudly burst through the door, stark bollock naked, to take a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 281

You deserved it 2 715

Stranger danger

By shit - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom taking a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself, "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard, "No, you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud, or that I wasn't alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 719

You deserved it 31 734

Compacted

By RatFailure - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I looked into my sink's garbage disposal for the first time since I moved in two months ago. Apparently, the putrid smell was not the food I've been throwing down it, but instead, a now what appears to be mutilated litter of rats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 937

You deserved it 3 847

How could you?

By Ashlee - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while on a date with my boyfriend, he broke up with me. The reason why? Because I took a dump in his bathroom and "that's inappropriate for girls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 230

You deserved it 7 910

Surprising

By Anonymous - 28/11/2019 20:00

Today, my younger sister had some friends over at ours. I was in the shower but was horrified to realize my clothes and towel were gone. Figuring that she took them, I tried to make it to my room without being seen, but one of her friends came up to use the bathroom. She saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 104

You deserved it 311

Piss poor prank

By peedonme - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - New Zealand

Today, I was in the toilet. Some idiots thought it was funny to throw a water balloon into the cubicle. The balloon didn't pop, but fell in the toilet, sending my own urine onto my shorts. I had 4 hours left of school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 261

You deserved it 2 941

Tough shit

By c.m.g. - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Today, I was taking a dump in a porta-potty at a fair. I had the runs really bad. All I have to say is that it's tough to take a shit that seems never-ending while other people outside are bitching at you and hammering on the flimsy door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 572

You deserved it 3 914

Dude, what the…?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I woke up to my apartment filled with smoke, fire alarms blaring. My roommate set my kitchen on fire while making hot dogs. This is the fourth time this has happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 032

You deserved it 4 741

Next

Top comments

Death_From_Above 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:45

that's a bit disturbing

chickunkey 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:49

You should expand your talents for all to see. Get your own show.

Comments

pandapoopDX 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:05

you should be a police dog

A7X_LoVeee 10

Thursday 21 April 2011 20:04

lmfao

RaineLee 5

Thursday 21 April 2011 23:16

LOL

joshosh420 2

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:08

Why would you post this it isnt an fml moment.

paprikacha 9

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:59

You need some other hobbies, man. That's insane.

sebastianduarte1 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 13:01

its a girl, smart one.

yadudewhatsgood 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:20

hahahha I totally do the same thing with my 5 other roommates. so funny.

hihi1212 1

Thursday 21 April 2011 14:37

disturbing .. just grose

AnagenisisZagus 13

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:28

You're like a police dog, man! Now, if one of them excretes their plump, smelly shit in the bathroom of their crime victim, you can close the case with a nice whiff of the turd! Be happy, man! :D

germanturk 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:20

well someone has too much time on their hands...

Heather_x0x0 6

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:21

well, I guess you could call it a talent...hey. you're gifted!

larryliggetts 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:56

lmfao you guys must have some good times

herroeverybody 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 10:10

that's not bad. you can tell which one made the mess by the smell.

Claytonic 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 10:25

That could be an epic game of battle *****!

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The Top

Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 025

You deserved it 5 457

Today, after waiting two weeks for an email with my online textbook access code, it still hadn't arrived in time for my quiz tomorrow, so I ended up spending most of my money on the expensive physical copy. Not long after I got back home, the email finally arrived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 204

You deserved it 5 035

The Top

Today, my friend, who I'm moving in with, flew up to drive from Pennsylvania to Texas, where she lives, with me. I went to the airport to pick her up and we discovered she accidentally flew to the wrong airport. On the other side of the state. I'm driving through the night to rescue her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 107

You deserved it 1 345

Today, at a philanthropic event in some old money rich family's garden, I told my daughter she'd have to improve her table manners if she wanted to marry a nice man like that. I looked up and our host was standing right there, looking sternly in our direction. I smiled but he didn't smile back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 184

You deserved it 990

Today, a guy tried to seduce me by talking about incest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 472

You deserved it 3 728

Today, my boyfriend and I were sitting on the couch and his legs were on my lap. We heard a loud firework from somewhere outside our window, we both jumped and I felt the pain of him kicking me in the nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 266

You deserved it 419

Today, I overheard my boyfriend admitting that he's only dating me because having me around "sucks a bit less than fucking my own hand". FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 779

You deserved it 5 321

Today, an old man, while I was working, asked me to spell average-length words. Confused, I refused. Turns out I was apparently taking too long counting the large amount of small change he'd given to me, and he assumed I couldn't count or spell. I study law, and I've learned basic calculus. Welcome to retail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 783

You deserved it 1 002