Embarrassing Health The pirate look

The pirate look

Anonymous - 13/11/2008 03:01 - France

Today, I scratched my cornea and have to wear a large bandage covering my eye. I'm off today, but I'll probably have to wear it to school tomorrow. FML

28 074

5 980

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Looks good

Anonymous - 12/08/2009 20:12 - Denmark

Today, I got stung by a bee. On my eyelid. I'm allergic so it's swollen up so much, I can't even open my eye. Tomorrow is the first day of a new prestigious school. I either have to go to school wearing an eye-patch or walk around looking like a monster. FML

48 844

3 340

Dante - 07/01/2011 00:26

Today, I fell and got a nasty cut above my right eye. The doctor in the ER sealed the wound with surgical glue. He also glued his glove to my eyebrow, and let glue run onto my eyelid. Not only do I have a scar and medical bill, I now have no eyebrow or eyelashes on my right eye. FML

34 842

2 481

dangeronpa - 14/06/2019 02:32

Today, I broke my glasses. My eyesight is horrible, I can’t see things that aren’t super close to my face. I'm supposed to drive to another state tomorrow. FML

1 713

219

Not now, honey

rhya4n - - Denmark - Herlev

Today, while I was applying some eyeliner, my cat jumped onto the counter and managed to headbutt me. The wand scratched a good portion of my eyeball, and now for the next few weeks, I will have to deal with the pain of a corneal abrasion. FML

25 339

3 454

Anonymous - 05/04/2012 01:41 - United States - Lindale

Today, I started my brand new job. I was late because while repairing my favorite pair of high heels, I got Superglue in my eye. They had to scrape my cornea and I have to wear an eye patch. I'm now the "New pirate" in the office. FML

15 817

20 736

RedEye - 11/07/2017 17:30 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, my contact ripped in half in my eye. One half fell out, but the other half got stuck too far under my eyelid. An hour and $100 later, Urgent Care finally got it. FML

4 658

340

Headshot

suhleedah18 - - United States

Today, I was working on my computer when my dad walks in, pointing his finger at me like a gun. Before I could even ask, it turns out he was aiming a rubber band at me. The doctor says I'll be able to take off my eyepatch in a couple of days. FML

35 372

2 748

Ahoy there!

sanza666 - 26/04/2019 00:00

Today, I shattered a coffee pot at work and ended up with a piece of glass in my eye. Now I have to look like a pirate until its healed, and it's nowhere near Halloween. FML

1 898

226

failedmusician - 03/06/2009 10:06 - New Zealand

Today, my band went to play a set for the first time. I'm the drummer. All was going well, and then before our first song I threw the sticks in the air, went to catch them, and one hit me right in the eye. I couldn't continue playing. Now I have to wear an eyepatch. FML

15 719

59 080

Now you tell me!

Anonymous - 13/08/2009 23:14 - United States

Today, I went to the eye doctor. He tells me that I've developed a severe allergy to contact lenses and must stop wearing them immediately. It wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't just visited him a week earlier, paid for a new prescription and ordered a year's worth of brand new lenses. FML

44 766

4 012

StephanieSays 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 20:33

Don't be a weenie. My friend got a paper cut on her eye and is now partially color blind.

mister_moops 0

Wednesday 18 March 2009 23:04

i don't understand. are you crying because you have to wear the bandage or because of the scratch?

TwinRoxas 7

Friday 22 July 2011 9:54

I come from a community wear eye patches are all the rage!

Allikayxolove 0

Thursday 28 July 2011 17:23

get over it.so did I.

mofran 0

Saturday 6 August 2011 13:05

was your eye THAT itchy?

RoLLiN_CoAL 4

Thursday 17 November 2011 15:44

I've crushed my cornea, and I didn't need to wear a bandage. I went to school like that, it's no big deal. who cares what people thing of it.

DanaxasRhosyn 0

Monday 30 January 2012 19:00

this has happened to me too, a couple times actually

loginword123 0

Monday 20 February 2012 4:54

"Probably" being the key word

Sunshine_753 0

Saturday 7 July 2012 16:51

I got my eye scratched, I had to wear it for only a day, and I just skipped school, big whoop

Faye2210 9

Saturday 8 September 2012 22:46

This isn't really that bad and it's not funny at all

CaliLoveFire 23

Wednesday 13 November 2013 18:01

happened to me in 5th grade. but instead of the bandage they gave me a pirate style eyepatch which my brother decided to glue a googly eye on

auro7 18

Monday 3 February 2014 7:55

Had that happen to me before. I just had these eye drops and protective contact lenses I had to wear for 2 days

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I found out that my dad has a therapist. That's cool. What's cooler is that she's a very nice lady, and even said to ME that I could talk too if I wanted to. Boy, do I want to. But if I did, then she would probably need a therapist herself, and the last thing my dad needs is his therapist needing a therapist. FML

257

411

Today, I went on a rollercoaster for the first time in years. Almost immediately, I realized that my shorts were no match for the forces of gravity. I spent the rest of the ride clinging to my seat for dear life while trying to subtly cover my exposed ass. FML

418

632

Today, my husband told me, "Your job is easy! You do nothing but play and have fun with children all day." Mind you, I'm a toddler teacher and have 10 children in a day. When I come home from work, he complains he’s tired because he was watching our only child who's a toddler. FML

1 328

142

Today, a guy took me out on a date. His imaginary friends joined us. FML

43 291

3 684

Today, I think I found out just how many times I've ordered through UberEats when my delivery guy told me that, "We should stop seeing each other like this!" with a chuckle. FML

1 524

530

Today, I was so insecure, I got scared of what people might think of my fingers. FML

22 677

6 050