Embarrassing Health The pirate look

The pirate look

Anonymous - 13/11/2008 03:01 - France

Today, I scratched my cornea and have to wear a large bandage covering my eye. I'm off today, but I'll probably have to wear it to school tomorrow. FML

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Looks good

Anonymous - 12/08/2009 20:12 - Denmark

Today, I got stung by a bee. On my eyelid. I'm allergic so it's swollen up so much, I can't even open my eye. Tomorrow is the first day of a new prestigious school. I either have to go to school wearing an eye-patch or walk around looking like a monster. FML

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Dante - 07/01/2011 00:26

Today, I fell and got a nasty cut above my right eye. The doctor in the ER sealed the wound with surgical glue. He also glued his glove to my eyebrow, and let glue run onto my eyelid. Not only do I have a scar and medical bill, I now have no eyebrow or eyelashes on my right eye. FML

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dangeronpa - 14/06/2019 02:32

Today, I broke my glasses. My eyesight is horrible, I can’t see things that aren’t super close to my face. I'm supposed to drive to another state tomorrow. FML

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Not now, honey

rhya4n - - Denmark - Herlev

Today, while I was applying some eyeliner, my cat jumped onto the counter and managed to headbutt me. The wand scratched a good portion of my eyeball, and now for the next few weeks, I will have to deal with the pain of a corneal abrasion. FML

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Anonymous - 05/04/2012 01:41 - United States - Lindale

Today, I started my brand new job. I was late because while repairing my favorite pair of high heels, I got Superglue in my eye. They had to scrape my cornea and I have to wear an eye patch. I'm now the "New pirate" in the office. FML

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RedEye - 11/07/2017 17:30 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, my contact ripped in half in my eye. One half fell out, but the other half got stuck too far under my eyelid. An hour and $100 later, Urgent Care finally got it. FML

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Headshot

suhleedah18 - - United States

Today, I was working on my computer when my dad walks in, pointing his finger at me like a gun. Before I could even ask, it turns out he was aiming a rubber band at me. The doctor says I'll be able to take off my eyepatch in a couple of days. FML

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Ahoy there!

sanza666 - 26/04/2019 00:00

Today, I shattered a coffee pot at work and ended up with a piece of glass in my eye. Now I have to look like a pirate until its healed, and it's nowhere near Halloween. FML

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failedmusician - 03/06/2009 10:06 - New Zealand

Today, my band went to play a set for the first time. I'm the drummer. All was going well, and then before our first song I threw the sticks in the air, went to catch them, and one hit me right in the eye. I couldn't continue playing. Now I have to wear an eyepatch. FML

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Now you tell me!

Anonymous - 13/08/2009 23:14 - United States

Today, I went to the eye doctor. He tells me that I've developed a severe allergy to contact lenses and must stop wearing them immediately. It wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't just visited him a week earlier, paid for a new prescription and ordered a year's worth of brand new lenses. FML

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StephanieSays 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 20:33

Don't be a weenie. My friend got a paper cut on her eye and is now partially color blind.

mister_moops 0

Wednesday 18 March 2009 23:04

i don't understand. are you crying because you have to wear the bandage or because of the scratch?

hallucinog3n 0

Thursday 5 February 2009 15:07

boo ******* hoo

xlostwithoutu 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 6:53

U little shit

XBCX96 4

Wednesday 24 February 2010 8:54

i agree w/ #1, so ******* what? id be excited to where that to school, i've always wanted to be a pirate:) lol

goldenone 2

Saturday 13 March 2010 8:49

that's bad ass... not an fml.

animalfreak4ever 0

Monday 26 April 2010 20:15

Oh stop whinning! I've done that before and yes it's painful, but who cares about what other people think? You should be ******* thankful that your not going blind like I am. Grow up.

Cjw1220 0

Tuesday 20 July 2010 22:45

I would love wearing that, suck it up and be a pirate!

SadNemo 0

Saturday 14 August 2010 22:15

It's probably cool looking. I saw an eye bandage at the store, and it looked awesome. Come on, I doubt there is a person out there that is such an asshole that they make fun of a guy who hurt his eye.

Notimetobleed 14

Saturday 11 December 2010 7:51

#1 how high are you in your profile pic?

jstar20 0

Monday 23 February 2009 0:09

i did that the first day of school this year and missed the next three.. which consisted of my first volleyball game of the season and two quizzes i couldn't make up. shit sucks.

StephanieSays 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 20:33

Don't be a weenie. My friend got a paper cut on her eye and is now partially color blind.

kindofgocrazy 0

Saturday 15 August 2009 9:21

She got a paper cut on her eye? Holy shit... how'd she do that? Looking too close to the edge of a paper, and just 'happened' to fall on it?

animalfreak4ever 0

Monday 26 April 2010 20:17

I've done that. it's a lot easyer then you think. And a ton more painful then you'd think

chloelauren23 3

Tuesday 17 March 2009 2:40

been there...it sucks.

mister_moops 0

Wednesday 18 March 2009 23:04

i don't understand. are you crying because you have to wear the bandage or because of the scratch?

dumbfounded 0

Wednesday 18 March 2009 23:36

Shut the **** up, you ass pirate.

Epic_Fail_Sauce 0

Friday 20 March 2009 0:01

Pirate is win :D

Taylorxterror 0

Friday 20 March 2009 11:51

I did that, although I did it at the right time, I was in the second grade, and everyone thought I was badass, being a pirate and all. Sorry buddy

dk_fml 0

Saturday 21 March 2009 23:54

Ya know, I heard from my doc not long ago that the bandages really aren't necessary--takes the same amount of time to heal without them. Still sucks for ya, though.

ash14 0

Tuesday 1 February 2011 0:48

Yeah I don't understand why they HAD to wear one. Two months ago, I had a scratched cornea, bruised retina, and a swollen iris, and it wasn't necessary at all to have a bandage over my eye.