By no spank - 11/8/2020 20:01

The Breeders

Today, my family once again mocked and insulted me for being the only one to not spank my kids. Apparently, they’ll grow up entitled and in prison if I don’t. Odd, seeing as my kids are 10 times better behaved than their kids, who get spanked on a regular. Ah well, here’s to hitting kids I guess. FML
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By  blue_pitt  |  10

im a firm believer in spanking your kids but i also believe that you should talk to them and have them understand why they got it in the first place and if you are able to teach them to behave without it thats fantastic to me the spanking should only be a last resort

COMMENTS
By  anomynous  |  8

FYL for being mocked by the rest of your family, but props for being the only decent parent out of them. Remember, a solid portion of the world agrees with you!

By  blue_pitt  |  10

im a firm believer in spanking your kids but i also believe that you should talk to them and have them understand why they got it in the first place and if you are able to teach them to behave without it thats fantastic to me the spanking should only be a last resort

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  Mathalamus  |  24

Spanking is just abuse. A shortcut for people who uses violence to prove their right. Spanking is a sign of extremely bad parenting. I wasspanked as a child and you know wha it taught me? That violence was acceptable to my idiot dad who was too stupid to find anything better.

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  Win  |  9

There’s a lot of stupid adults, but do we go around smacking them if they don’t “listen” to us? No because that is a criminal act. Shocker, right?

So um how does it make sense to smack a kid who is even less aware of the world. Stop fucking up your kids folks. Spanking and smacking is abuse. If you can’t control kids in another way, you are parenting wrong. It isn’t an easy task being a parent, so if you can’t handle that fact - don’t reproduce. Better than misusing your larger size (compared to a tiny kid) and power in that situation. Just no.

By  icalledhisname  |  11

The thing is that different kids need different things, one size doesn’t fit all. Although it sounds like you’re doing the right thing for yours and your family has no right to judge, they might be doing what’s best for their kids. I never spanked my child and I have real regrets, she’s a problem child who likely would have benefitted from spanking. I’m glad I didn’t for the pure fact I can say I never did, but I have a lot of what if’s.

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  s_ve  |  7

Honestly, in a lot of cases When you spank your children it sparks fear in them that can effect them in the long run. It can also teach them that hitting is a way to resolve problems. It’s all about communication. You can punish a child in other ways that will show them when you are bad you won’t get tv or you won’t get to go to the movies or what ever. Hitting a child even if it’s a spanking just shows then violence will occur.

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  Win  |  9

I can make the same argument about “one size doesn’t fit all” for adults too. There’s a lot of stupid adults but do we go around smacking them if they don’t “listen” to us? No because that is a criminal act. Shocker, right?

So um how does it make sense to smack a kid who is even less aware of the world. Stop fucking up your kids, folks. Spanking and smacking is abuse. If you can’t control kids in another way, you are parenting wrong. It isn’t an easy task being a parent. Misusing your larger size and power in that situation is ridiculously disgusting. Just no.

Also here’s more, kids will not grow up to be perfect because there’s hundreds of factors to consider. Ex: Their neighbourhood environment; their school teachings & environment; parents presence or absence; presence or absence of alcoholic parent or drug addiction in household; personal traits & genetically inherited temperaments, and so on. Just like adults aren’t perfect, kids won’t be either. Kids who get smacked grow fucked up with an over-activated amygdala + a while strain of other things. Kids who don’t, have other issues. So how about we conclude that violence isn’t the answer but maybe something else is? It is wrong to conclude that your kid should have been beat. Do you believe you should be beat or smacked for things that you probably do in a “fucked up” way? Because, let’s be real: we ALL have those shortcomings.

Yes it’s infuriating & frustrating to see your kids go down a path of possible destruction. But children aren’t property, neither are they robots. Parents should only strive do their best. There are too many factors out of the parents’ control to be blamed for a child’s behaviours.

Your child is their own person. Don’t justify violence and fail to see the larger picture please.

By  Taurus_ChicKa  |  36

There's nothing wrong with spanking a kid. Spanking is not the same as hitting. Some kids need a pop on the butt. That being said, a spank isn't an instant fix. That's probably why the rest of the kids in your family are so ill-behaved. They need more than spanking. They need time outs, privileges taken away, stern talking to, etc. I don't even have kids and I know better.

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Yeah, in French we say "I used to have principles, now I have children." There's nothing worse than a smug child-free person telling parents how to raise their kids. Come back when you know what you're talking about.

As for spanking, all it teaches the kid is that sometimes they get hit. They rarely understand why because they are mostly spanked in the heat of the moment rather than cold-bloodedly after an explanation of their misdeeds. So they learn to be afraid of random violence. I suppose there are worse lessons when you live in a country of madmen touting guns. One might draw a connection between random violence in society and random violence in families though.

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Mostly children behave worse with their parents than with strangers. They trust their parents to love them. Situations where a child is not afraid of being left with strangers are red flags to people in charge of taking children into care.

By  Taylor Caldwell  |  9

There has never been any research to show that physically punishing kids is beneficial in any way, the data in fact shows that kids have a better chance of growing up with personal issues, aggression, depression etc. Don’t let people’s uneducated opinions weigh on your mind.