That's not a real thing
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By just_friends - 27/10/2010 17:19 - United States
Life goes on. Since she friendzoned you, she provides little to know value to you anymore so I'd ignore her. Maybe block her if it's mentally stressful to you. Move on and keep doing you.
In the USA there was a common line “It’s not you, it’s me” that was a way of trying to break up without hurting the other person’s feelings. Now another perspective in essentially the same thing is “friend zone”… It matters less what reason she said than the fact that the two of you just didn’t have the chemistry for her. And frankly there is nothing that you can or should do to change that. All you can do is to move on and find another possible partner who will be as interested in you as you are in them. Human relationships are complicated and there has to be a compatibility on both parts for it to work. But despite what some might say, there is no “one love of my life” there are only people who are more or less compatible with each other - That means that if a relationship doesn’t work out there are other possibilities out there. But focusing your attention on one person who has told you that they don’t find you appealing only keeps you from eventually finding someone who will value you for who you are as will you value them for being themselves… So move on from this relationship that was not to be and don’t spend any more time pursuing them. But look carefully at yourself and talk to a hopefully, brutally honest, friend who will tell you if there are minor things about the way you present yourself that could be polished up a little. We need to be ourselves and be honest about who we are, but you need to show your best qualities without being a braggart or self-centered which is highly negative.
A little less conversation, a little more action, please. She probably concluded that you are all talk, no action.
Keywords
In the USA there was a common line “It’s not you, it’s me” that was a way of trying to break up without hurting the other person’s feelings. Now another perspective in essentially the same thing is “friend zone”… It matters less what reason she said than the fact that the two of you just didn’t have the chemistry for her. And frankly there is nothing that you can or should do to change that. All you can do is to move on and find another possible partner who will be as interested in you as you are in them. Human relationships are complicated and there has to be a compatibility on both parts for it to work. But despite what some might say, there is no “one love of my life” there are only people who are more or less compatible with each other - That means that if a relationship doesn’t work out there are other possibilities out there. But focusing your attention on one person who has told you that they don’t find you appealing only keeps you from eventually finding someone who will value you for who you are as will you value them for being themselves… So move on from this relationship that was not to be and don’t spend any more time pursuing them. But look carefully at yourself and talk to a hopefully, brutally honest, friend who will tell you if there are minor things about the way you present yourself that could be polished up a little. We need to be ourselves and be honest about who we are, but you need to show your best qualities without being a braggart or self-centered which is highly negative.
Life goes on. Since she friendzoned you, she provides little to know value to you anymore so I'd ignore her. Maybe block her if it's mentally stressful to you. Move on and keep doing you.