Today, I found out that my boyfriend is a Mormon, when his mother greeted me saying how happy she was her son had found himself a Mormon girlfriend. I know nothing about Mormonism, except from what I've seen on South Park, and I'm an atheist. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my boyfriend's family for the first time. We got on the subject of theatre, and his dad brought up "The Book of Mormon", how finally someone was making fun of those "nasty, polygamist, cultist freaks", and if his son ever dated one, he would disown him. I'm Mormon. FML
Today, I answered the door to two Mormon girls from America. I live in the UK and am not religious at all, but I was too polite to slam the door and ended up letting them in. An hour later, a copy of 'The Book of Mormon' and 'My Pathway to Baptism' and I think I'm now a Mormon. FML
Today, I was hanging out with a friend out of state. He had some friends with him and we were all having a great time, until they found out I live in Utah. They instantly assumed I was Mormon and started to act weird around me. This is a frequent occurrence. FML
Today, I found out my hot Mormon neighbors can be gay, but they can’t act on it. FML
Today, I found out that my parents think my boyfriend is the devil. FML
Today, I discovered that the guy I've been seeing is a firm supporter of the Westboro Baptist Church. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he is homophobic. This wouldn't be such a big deal, if my mother wasn't a lesbian. He doesn't know this yet, and I'm afraid to tell him. FML
Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his parents and siblings for the first time. Their first reaction was, "Oh? You're her? All this time we thought you're some cartoon character from yet another lousy anime he keeps babbling about." FML
Today, my son announced he was leaving our religion. I told him that, as sad I was, that I accepted and loved him. He seemed disappointed, and I noticed him discreetly fiddling with a camera. A little snooping led me to his Reddit account, where he called us all, "inbred, illiterate, bible-thumpers." FML
Today, I found out that me having a boyfriend is an on-going family joke. FML
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Top comments
Pentium_4 27
bravo for watching south park!
pretty_coin 11
Can't you just ask him to teach you more about it?
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Comments (38)
Enslaved 38
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Get ready to have him want to marry your sister, too!
perdix 31
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Politely tell your future mother-in-law that you have never actually mormed, you are looking forward to learning how to morm. BTW, in the next few months, you'll learn everything you ever want to know about Mormonism with the rise of Mitt Romney, until Barack Obama kicks his elitist, one-percenter ass to the curb, and then South Park will again be the leading source of information.
cntryiscntrywide 0
Id refuse to be religious for a man, I only believe in what I believe is right.
perdix 31
I'd bend like a pretzel to make the woman I love happy . . . or to get laid.
jmad109 3
Yes because obama did such a good job
doubleroses 3
Funny....-_-
perdix 31
#31. He didn't have to. When the best the other side could come up with is a corporate raider who likes to fire people, he just has to be the non-asshole in the contest to win it easily. Frankly, I think the only candidate who would have had a shot dropped out yesterday.
Freefallingdown 1
You're not seriously implying that Romney is NOT part of the 1%, are you?
antmanzero 8
Ah, FML. The best place to rant about politics and religion.
TheGreatAlexande 12
Forgive me if I'm wrong, but isn't Obama and all of the people who are helping him get to his 1 billion dollar campaign fund goal in the 1%?
perdix 31
#73, most of the people helping Obama get to that goal are dirty, unwashed 99%ers. #43, I implied nothing of the sort. I did infer from your comment that your literacy skills are lacking.
Enslaved 38
^ twisted. Lol
jellenwood 35
Who dropped out?
Pelreskovich 11
I always thought religious beliefs were a quick topic to learn about someone before you start dating.. Learn more before committing.
AngryBeaver32 8
Well said
TheSithAssassin 15
They are not radically different. The Pope has accepted it as one of the three beliefs that could get you to heaven.
girl112891 7
I was going to say the same. It is one of the first few things you should learn about someone in the beginning. Far before meeting parents. It's time to sit and talk to your boyfriend because this is one thing you can't lie about or go around. The sooner the better.
scoobyfiend 0
How does it feel to be dating a soulless creature?
allyboss78 16
That episode of south park pretty much covers it.
crystalou_fml 3
It totally makes fun of them, but aside from the caricature of the family itself, the historical portions are actually quite accurate.
cntryiscntrywide 0
My boyfriends best friend is a Mormon. He's 27 and a virgin
mudkipsan 19
Only 3 more years and he'll become a wizard!
perdix 31
13 more years and he's Steven Carell!
cntryiscntrywide 0
My boyfriend has been trying to get him Laid for over 10 years lol. He's waiting until marriage.
josiefay 0
Nothing wrong with that. Religion or not it's his choice.
DeviantBreeder 7
Sounds like your boyfriend's bestie should be writing FML's. Haha. He certianly will be once he realizes he missed out on sowing his wild oats in his prime years.
Psycho_Babydoll 26
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Start watching Big Love. You'll learn all you need to know about Mormons.
ShyAnn29 15
Except Mormons don't practice polygamy, there's the FLDS, but they're not part of the mainstream Mormon religion
GoW_Chick 15
So just because they're not mainstream they don't get recognized as Mormons?
philzilla 1
Op you're in for a wild ride, just not sexually
Avalanches 9
Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb!
CaptainCats 14
"Big Love" has nothing to do with traditional Mormonism, it just elaborates on a very small cult like sect of the religion. Don't listen to these guys.
crystalou_fml 3
Actually Big Love has everything to do with "traditional" Mormonism. Hence the term "fundamentalist latter day saints"