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By  Chazzster  |  21

OP, obviously your mom is not equipped to help you deal with your depression. There are other resources. If you are in school or college they have counselors who may be able to help. If you have health insurance coverage your medical doctor can usually recommend a mental health professional. It will cost but it is worth the cost. If you belong to a church the pastor or minister or priest may be able to provide counseling or recommend you to someone who can.

OP, speaking personally - My own childhood was mostly happy and balanced. But when I got to be a teenager I began to feel depression. It was at its worse when I was in college. In my case the episodes of depression were generally episodes and not long term depression - meaning they lasted sometimes hours and occasionally for a couple of days. In my case I learned that they always passed - that knowledge helped me to get through the bad times knowing it was not permanent. I also eventually observed that sometimes the triggers were situational meaning caused by something said or done and occasionally they were not apparently triggered by any event - just a mood that came on for no reason. Understanding myself helped some. Knowing that I could survive even the worst episode gave me hope to get through other episodes. Do not make decisions or take actions that cannot be changed while depressed - You are not thinking well at this time and are prone to making mistakes.

I well understand that when the emotional pain is at it’s worse, sometimes you start envisioning your own death. That is a trap that pushes you away from real solutions to your problems. And never act on such thoughts because if carried out the results are permanent and you will miss out on the good things that life can bring. Remember that depression is usually temporary and passes.

OP I eventually learned coping mechanisms that worked for me - including listening to music and writing out my thoughts and trying to figure out how to overcome the things that triggered my depression. Alcohol or other drugs may be tempting at times when you are hurting - but it’s a trap. It can leave you dependent and does not help you solve things that trigger the feelings and can leave you in a cycle that repeats the pain.

By my early 20’s I rarely experienced the kind of episodes I felt earlier in my life. But as an adult later during difficult episodes in my life I reached out for help. I found that professional counseling was the most helpful long term. They can teach you techniques to help solve the underlying issues that prompt depression. And I also found it helpful to unburden my mind having someone neutral to talk to who would not judge me. I also rediscovered the advantages of journaling. The act of organizing your thoughts to write them down helps you to work things through logically. Antidepressants can be prescribed and they will give relief but it’s always temporary - The body tends to develop a tolerance and higher dosages with more side effects are then required causing it’s own problems. Counseling, on the other hand, builds up to success - the relief starts slow but it’s ultimately more long lasting. In extreme cases both together may be required with the goal of eventually getting off the antidepressants and dealing with things with the techniques learned in counseling.

OP, hang in there. There is more than one way out or through the difficulty. There are a few traps to avoid. Many of us have been through this - It often runs in families. I wish you well.