Today, I was sitting shotgun in the car. A huge bug came inside, and everyone began to freak out so naturally I began to swat at it. I got the fly, but I also cracked the windshield. I paid $229 to kill a bug. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, about to fall asleep, a bug started buzzing behind the screen to my window. Losing my sanity, I punched the screen, forgetting all about the glass. I now have a cracked window and one still annoying bug. FML
Today, as I was driving, a massive cockroach clicked its way across my windshield. I pulled over to fling it out the window, but it spread its wings and flew around like a hook-armed stabbing machine. I lost it in the dark car and now I can't find it. It's going to be a long drive home. FML
Today, I ruined my computer screen trying to kill a fly. FML
Today, while I was eating, a fly kept pissing me off. After three minutes of it buzzing around, I caught it and killed it. Then, without realizing it, I smeared its guts all over the front of my shirt. FML
Today, as I was hanging washing out in the sun, a huge cicada flew into my face and somehow got behind my glasses. I screamed and ripped them off and ran away. I came back to a broken pair of VERY expensive glasses. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to pee on a small bug in the toilet. A much larger bug thought it would be funny to fly into my eye while I was doing this. FML
Today, while I was relaxing outside drinking a beer after a long day, a moth decided to fly right into my ear canal. I instinctively threw my hand up to swat it out. With the same hand holding the beer. I soaked the side of my face and down my ear. At least I got the bug out. FML
Today, I noticed an extremely large bug buzzing around my room. After several attempts, I stomped on it with my shoe. I was trying to get a closer look at my victory when it flew into my nostril. Turns out it was just playing dead. FML
Today, I was taking a break in my work truck when I saw a huge swarm of bees flying my way. I have a hand crank window so I started cranking it up as fast as I could and the knob snapped off before it closed and I got stung by the whole swarm before I could get out. FML
Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML
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Top comments
kelseysue92 0
Are you the hulk?!? Fly make hulk angry....HULK SMASH!
a_b_c_soup 0
so....you hit THAT hard to swat a fly? fail...
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Comments (132)
bubs_AKA_vermin 0
8 is win. but hey, i'd prob'ly do the same thing... ...except with a newspaper.
kyueb 0
Lying shit. Did you use a ******* waffle iron to kill it?
exthalion 0
For those of you that don't know where the term shotgun comes from, it is because in the westerdan days during the pony express, the gaurd was hired to "ride shotgun" he would sit at the front of the wagon with his shotgun to protect it from bandits.
spikeyhair4me 0
Dude, dont stress about it. I know exactly how you feel. Been there, done that. And for all those of you who say it is impossible to do so, its not. I can happen.
Imnotlinda432 0
The fly's ghost punished you :O
jkilla6 0
no you paid $229 to fix a windshield because you're a spaz.
Dane_fml 0
Where you wearing brass knuckles by chance?
VLLYBLLKAY 0
you hit THAT hard to kill a fly? That's ridiculous, i would understand if it were like a bird or or even a bee but a FLY? it must've been the biggest damn fly you've ever seen.
24788 7
Lol, the fly owned you!
DrishelxFTxFyr3 0
Today, I saw a really shiny car, so I flew over to check it out. This weird person was staring at me. I flew into the car, and I felt safe. Then a sharp pain. FML