Today, my wife made me a Sex Rewards Chart, where I get points by doing chores and such, and 50 points gets me some action. She refuses to even look at me if I haven't earned the points, and is contemplating sleeping alone in the guest room until I earn more points. FML
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Today, my wife has implemented a point-based system for sex. The list she sent shows I can I earn, for example, 20 points for washing the dishes, 50 for vacuuming the house, but only 5 for walking the dog. I get some action for every 5,000 points I earn, which should take about 4 months if I really work at it. FML
Today, I told my husband I was making a points system for him to earn sex by doing chores and favors. He said, "Okay, I'll make one for dates. Every time you go five days without whining or nagging me, you get a date." I give up. FML
Today, my wife flat out refuses to have sex with me, ever. Most days it's "What have you done to earn sex?" then when I point out all I do (pay bills, work hard, take care of her, the kids and the house) it's, "Oh, so that means I owe you sex?" I even got that excuse on my birthday. FML
Today, my wife made a system where I earn gaming time by either giving her money or doing her favors. Now whenever I use my phone, she accuses me of "secretly playing Xbox games" and gets pissed at me. I'm 28 years-old. FML
Today, my wife decided she didn't want to lose weight with me. We were trying to decide on a reward for each pound lost. I suggested sex as the reward. She felt it wasn't fair to punish her just because I lost weight. FML
Today, I got off early from work to catch my wife screwing her co-worker in our bed. I ask her what I did to deserve this. She told me she was “lonely” and that he “always makes her feel like a woman,” unlike me. She would come home from work and I would initiate intimacy, but she would decline every time. FML
Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her to do something for me to get me in the mood. She sighed and then went upstairs to get ready for work. FML
Today, my wife is treating me like I'm the devil, all because I refused to go on medication that would kill my sex drive, just so she wouldn't have to deal with me actually wanting to make love more than once a year. FML
Today, after my wife set a new rule to improve my health, one sex session for every three visits to the gym, which has greatly improved our sex life for two months, and I've never been fitter, but now she complains I'm not keeping her company on the couch anymore. FML
Today, my wife can't be bothered to do anything that isn't work, talk about her work, and sit on the sofa. Then she complains that I don't show any affection, when she can be bothered to even talk to me. FML
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Top comments
tanekdrachonae 19
Guess you should get to work then.
MelTheGreat 23
Sweep or weep.
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Comments (280)
joliebleuciel 3
ha! u should rack up those points like crazy and hold her to it. remember that nights and weekends get u time and a half on points. good luck!
emily689 25
Your wife seems very smart and she knows how to get what she wants
reaxion 25
Grounds and evidence for a divorce right there, or justification to find a mistress :)
gregnc_fml 18
I believe that's called manipulation and control. Doesn't sound like it's working too well for either of you.
JoeyJaws68 18
Use this to your advantage. Do a shit ton of work and she can't ever say no
emisara93 18
That's just cruel and unusual. My husband and I created kind of a chore to-do list, and we decide who gets to do what, and it's worked out just fine.
Golden_Rydes 3
(That looks like cruelty to me, which is grounds for divorce in Ontario.) Congrats on having or working to have good communication with your husband.
Elric97 9
Maybe they already tried that and he didn't do his part.
tehdarkness 21
Please don't take this as an excuse to stray. Talk to her and work on your sex life together. Manipulating you with sex is wrong, but so is dropping the ball on your duties as a husband. Good luck.
lil_mars 1
What the ****, #136? You're gonna have one hell of a time getting through life and love with that attitude, asshole. Anyway... OP, sounds like you two need to talk this one out. Help her out, man. At least you get a reward for doing simple chores that everyone should be doing anyway...
SoultheWolf 19
It also comes down to different perspectives. For instance, if he's working a lot and she isn't, then he shouldn't be the one who has to do the chores. On the other hand, if she is the one who is working and he's just being a lay asshole then I would be in favor for her. Yet she is refusing to look at him and wants to sleep in another room, that is a huge concern. If they can't work it out then it will most likely end in divorce. People have gotten divorced for less things. Either way, I hope they can work it out.
SoultheWolf 19
I'm sorry OP... But kinda sounds like a divorce waiting to happen...
ThatHorse 15
Divorce in 3...2...1...