Today, the guy that I've recently became close to texted me, wanting to hook up. He's very cute and I was definitely interested, so I agreed. The drive to his house lasted longer than the actual sex. He lives less than five minutes away. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I walked to my boyfriend's house, which takes literally 2 minutes since we are also neighbours. He wanted sex straight away. The walk took longer than the sex, by over a full minute. FML
Today, I got off late from my bartending job, which is close to my house, but my boyfriend begged me to come to his place half an hour away. I decided the sex would be worth the drive. He was sound asleep. FML
Today, I hooked up with a guy. He didn't last 30 seconds before finishing, Then his car wouldn't start. I ended up walking home after a hook up that wasn't worth it. FML
Today, I got a text from a guy I hooked up with. I'm not really interested in him, so I rushed out of his house last night. He was letting me know I left my wallet at his house, and if I want it, I'll have to let him take me to dinner. FML
Today, I had sex with this guy I had been crushing on for five years. It took longer to put my clothes back on than he lasted. FML
Today, I drove over 3 hours to hook up with a guy I've been talking to for a couple of months. When we start having sex, he lasted less than a minute, and then couldn't get it up again afterwards. I slept uncomfortably the entire night on his twin bed while he snored. FML
Today, I got a phone call from my cheating ex, asking if I would go out with him tonight. After 3 years of no contact, I decided to give him another chance and gave him my address for his GPS. I was then told that I lived too far and he didn't want to drive. He cancelled. I live 15 minutes away. FML
Today, I thought it would be fun to have a sex session with my boyfriend. I sent him a suggestive message, and 30 minutes later he texted me back to let me know he was done. FML
Today, I went home with my cute coworker. What started out as a little dirty talk and teasing ended with him admitting he was in a terrible emotional place, then sending me home in an Uber so he could sleep. FML
Today, things heated up with the new guy I've been seeing for a couple of weeks, he kept saying things like "I want you so bad" and "it's going to take hours" to the point that I was so hot, I decided to go for it. Apparently he has "a problem sometimes" getting it up. FML
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Top comments
tyrob911 0
let's get this straight here. he texted her wanting to hook up. if you really understand that text, you'll know that the guy didn't care about pleasing her. all he wanted to do was nut and he did. he could care less how long it took him. his mission was accomplished.
summerloolooloo 0
I heard that there are new kinds of condoms which have some sort of a numbing cream on them. How about giving those a shot? HAHA.
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Comments (60)
animalcrosser5 0
Maybe you should live farther away.
dirtybriar9 0
Your a huge **** by the way.
OMGitsME432 1
I have the oddest feeling that most of the people calling her ****** and ***** are guys.. Yet their not saying anything about the guy texting HER to hook-up and HIM not lasting long. When a girl goes off and has sex just to hook-up, their automatically *****? But a guy can have sex when ever he wants and nothing.... SMFH...
niesenator 0
Can you say BOOTY CALL. How pathetic.
niesenator 0
btw omgitsme432 stop whining about how no one is pissed at the guy. him texting her for sex IMPLiES that he's a douche it doesn't need to be said. I'm a girl too but jeez what's with the sexist hating who cares? everyone knows guys are ******, little known fact get over it.
insidejokeswithm 0
Please, just shut the **** up.
ibhead101 0
i hate it wen guys cant last long or chose not to...it givs da rest of us bad names
cellycrunk 16
improve him if he's s hottie. :) teach him the ways!
itsohsoabsurd 6
how lazy are you to get in your car and drive to someones house if they live less than five minutes away?
Colonel_256 0
That's sad... I've only had sex three times and I can already last longer than my girlfriend. She has to pull me off of her
SexENic 0
Not smart!